husband in delivery room ? fainter

[gill]

Hi

a strange story.

I know all the men are there for us now in the delivery room. my partner is a fainter and although he wants to hold my hand etc he is very worried that he will faint during the delivery and cause a hassle to everybody. doctor etc, OB.. which he does not want to do. if anyone has seen coneheads, (movie) thats what I see him doing.

He thinks he can run in and out if that makes sense. I want him there of course but I agree he will fall down on me. He gets fainty watching me get blood tests. one good thing is once he faints he is okay after a few minutes and doesnt faint again.

He is not afraid of anything, its just a phobia from childhood (long story)

does anyone think its safe and acceptable to let him pop in and out etc or will that be a hassle too as I have no idea of this except from tv, as its my first baby.

he is way more scared of it all than me.

thanks all

gill


ps this forum has been a lifesaver so thanks to all including admins.

[Mumma2three]

he can run in and out if you want, they would understand. He might find he will be fine, and he can always be in a position where he doesnt' have to see all the gory bits. I was in a sitting position resting on DH's legs, so he didn't have a front on view, just from above, and he didnt' have to watch if he didn't want to. Talk to the Dr or midwives you're seeing also, they will know what to do. Good luck xo

[Trillian]

I'm sure they would be very understanding if he wanted to do that. I know men like that too, who wanted to support their wives, but didn't want to see the 'business end' of things. They could put a sheet over your knees like a screen if you want.

[jaspen]

my DH is the same and almost fainted in my caeser but the staff were really good and just took him out for a bit to sit down and brought him back as DS was born (I barely noticed cause I was too busy spewing sorry if TMI). He is sure with a full labour he'd be just as bad if not worse so in many ways would rather I just had another c/sect. is there someone else you can have there also in case you need someone while your DH is out of the room (says me who should be thinking along the same lines if I VBAC)?? But with respect to it being an issue with staff talk to them but I'm sure they've dealt with it on more than one occassion and may even expect it.

[BellyBelly]

Have you thought about having a birth attendant or doula? the last thing you want to worry about in labour is if he is okay, you need to worry about you or the anxiety will only slow labour. Continuous care during labour is exactly what the doctor ordered, but you have to get your own these days Check out https://www.bellybelly.com.au/birth-support for more info. I am also finishing off an article at the moment for men about birth support & their partner in labour.

[Freya]

I ditto everyone else. I wouldnt worry too much if he does faint, nothing you can really do about and I think he'll be more embarrassed and youll be busy giving birth!

Funny thing though, on our hospital tour the nurse made comment about the amount of skinny tall partners there were there that day, and that theyre always the ones to faint lol My hubby is a goner if she's right :shock:

[~Kim~]

From the nurses point of view - don't worry! Tell him not to either.
When I was a junior sister in theatre, that was my job - the dads. If they faint they faint. We won't let them hit their heads and hurt themselves and we promise we've seen it a thousand times.
We are your advocates, and that includes those nearest to you. I'm sure the midwives would rather let him in and out than have you both stressed. I know I would.

[gill]

thanks all

we both feel better

he may not lose it, his job actually involves often seeing car accidents, dead bodies etc.. not often live.

but in the hospital, live, blood, noise etc, the environment is all a bit much for him. he is going to get hypnotized to see if it all works.

but again, thankyou all.

cheers gill



ps i asked him about cutting the cord, but he said his friend (mate) did it and put him off. he was told it was like cutting a grizzly, like sausage. i must say im very very happy for the doc. OB....to do that too. my partner is a good fainter though, he feels it coming on and can usually lay down and save banging his head. his only gone for one minute. his fainted about 15 times (his 41) so he has it down pat.

anyone else have a preference for cutting the cord. ?