Help me get the best c/s experience possible.

[{sarah}]

I have decided for our next little one we are going to schedule another c/s. For my own reasons I have decided against trying for a VBA2C and am at peace with my decision. Now seeing as my two previous c/s weren't planned, I have no idea about how to go about it. What things should I be thinking about? Do I make a birth plan? Is there really anything that I can have control over? I'm thinking, music, having support in recovery, skin to skin, being able to touch bub straight away, type of closure (I'd prefer not to have staples again for eg).....

So please help me!! (only early days, I have 8 months to plan!)

[briggsy's girl]

i think if you can get your wishes in writing it's always better - that way you don't forget in the moment

DH and I talked a lot about c/s before DD was born as an "in case it happens" thing - all the things you've mentioned above we discussed, but also what drugs in the post birth period are something to consider - was there anything with Z or J that left you feeling too out of it? type of anaesthetic etc might be worth talking about too

there is still enough that you can have a say in - just because you're choosing the c/s birth doesn't mean you're choosing to be walked all over. you still deserve and empowered birth!

[Arimeh]

Good job deciding on what is best for you my love Its a hard decision to make.

I wouldn't choose staples again either, I recovered much better with stitches, but I think its up to the actual OB to choose which is their favourite closure - thats what I've found anyway

I hope you get everything that you want - definitely write up a plan and let them know your desires. Are you going to be going for a maternally assisted c/s? Have you considered that?

I'm so stoked that you are pregnant again - you make such gorgeous children!!!!

[grub17]

hi, good luck with it! just wanted to share what a midwife from our private hospy told us if we have a c-sect re: skin-2-skin... if you want bub skin-2-skin in the theatre, just tell them that' what's happening. they CAN'T say no without good medical reason and there's no reason you can't have your first feed straight afterwards while in the theatre.

we aren't planning C-sect - but i've never been so happy to hear something in my life lol.

hope that helps a little.

[ladybird11]

Other than the things you've already mentioned I am a big fan of great post natal care (something I'm yet to experience ).

Due to the lack of mobility afterwards I'd schedule visitors - even if they can be 'on call' so to speak, even if its just DH and a close friend or two, so if bubs is in a basinette / cot and he or she cries and you're unable to turn to reach him / her there is someone to pass bubs over to you for a cuddle / feed. Someone to help you with showering and getting mobile for the first time etc - as I've found its not best to rely on hospital staff as they're always flat chat it seems.

It might sound silly, but I had to get out of bed and walk around it to get DS a few times as nursing staff rarely answered the bell and DH wasn't there to help either at times.

HTH.

[~mamaspice~]

My suggestion would be to see if you could have a maternal assisted caesarean. You may or may not have seen my thread about it here in the caesarean section support section but attached to my thread is an awesome story with heaps of great tips to help you to have an empowering planned caesarean (maternal assisted or not).

[julie_ann_jules]

Hi!
I also had two c/s then decided to attempt a VBA2C. When writing my birthplan I spent ALOT of time writing the "in case of c/s section" to ensure I had an empowered birth.

Here is a copy of my birthplan
In case of Caesarean

As we mentioned before, we realise there may be problems (some we may not have taken into consideration here) and we are willing to co-operate, all that we ask is that our informed consent be sought before any procedure or medication is used.

We also realise there is a chance that Julie-Ann may require a caesarean, and all the points mentioned above then become mostly invalid. If Julie-Ann does need a caesarean the important points are mentioned below.

In case of caesarean:

-Lee and our independant midwife to be present.

-Julie-Ann to remain conscious during the operation if possible.

- If caesarean under general anaesthetic, then baby to be given to Lee straight after birth and held by him until Julie-Ann is awake and can be told of the baby's sex and well-being by Lee.

- Lower the screen so Lee and Julie-Ann can view the birth. Julie-Ann has had two previous caesareans and it is still a bit unreal, as she has never actually seen a baby leave her body - they tend to just appear from behind the green screen and be held up for a quick look before they disappear to be wrapped up and tested.

- A verbal description of the birth as it occurs. Julie-Ann especially has felt left out of her previous caesarean as her body and labour have been discussed as though she wasn't there.

-The cord to be left longer so Lee can still experience cutting the baby?s cord.

- Baby to be placed immediately on Julie-Ann?s chest in its naked newborn state with a warm blanket over them both. It would do a lot to make this surgical delivery a bit more natural for mother, father and baby. And it may even resolve a few inner conflicts that are faced after the birth.

-baby to be breastfed soon after birth

-baby to remain with Julie-Ann in recovery.

- We would like to view the placenta.

Thank you very much for taking the time to read our Birth Preferences, and I hope we can discuss any problems you see with it.
We thank you in advance for your support and kind attention to our choices, as we look forward to a wonderful birth. Your support and co-operation is really appreciated.
Sincerely,

Anyway I wish u an AMAZING and EMPOWERING birth!

[{sarah}]

Thank you for that Julie-Ann

[Rouge]

First of all congrats on making a decision I know it's been something you've been churning over for a while It will be an awesome birth!

Have you checked out my c/s plan? It's around somewhere... pretty similar to J&J's.

You're having a baby WOOHOO!

[suse]

Sarah - (and I've just realised I'm about to out myself here ), I'm facing the same thing, except that I don't have a choice in the matter. Which in some ways is easier as I can't second guess a decision I don't get to make, but anyhoo.

We might end up being c/s buddies - I'd say you're probably due around the same time as me. Yay!

Anyway, as well as things that others have suggested, I'll be doing the following:

- pushing for a surgery date as close to full term as possible. E was born ECS 14 days post dates after spontaneous labour, and was in no way overcooked. I'm also going to ask them about the feasibility of allowing labour to start prior to going into hospital for the surgery. Don't know whether they'll agree to this one though.

- Not telling anyone (except maybe one or two people) the date, to try to keep an element of spontaneity to it. Also to avoid the constant 'oooh, are you excited' calls leading up to the actual date. I'm just telling people that I'm due in July and will leave it at that.

Depending on the hospital it's usually unlikely that you'll get to have bubs with you in recovery itself, even if they have a midwife who can stay with you. This is primarily because there are other patients in recovery. If that's the case, I'd push for as much early contact whilst still in theatre. I've also been told that having bubs skin to skin whilst being stitched up is not a problem with a non-problematic surgery (which is normally the case with an elective), but if there is any haemorrhaging, for example, they will have to work on you quickly without you having skin to skin.

[{sarah}]

SUSE!!!!!

I'm also hoping to go as close as possible to EDD, Z was 8 days over & J was 10 days over so history says it shouldn't be a problem.

I was thinking the same thing about not sharing the date, though at least *someone* will have to know because I'll need a pair of hands to look after the kids. One thing that I have already made clear is that I will be introducing the new baby. Noone is to visit, including Z & J, until I am on the ward with my baby. I missed out on seeing family's reactions to my first two & I don't want to do that again.

Rouge, I decided that I'd prefer to enjoy my pregnancy than fight the whole way through like last time. It took a long time to get here, as you know, but I'm happy with the decision. That said, if I happen to go into labour before the c/s date I will absolutely be going for it. I'll have a hunt around for your old birth plan, I used it last time & it had great stuff in it.

[Hollybolly]

Sarah,

DH & I have been talking this over too - & Dr S has asked what our expectations/wishes are.

There's so many things, I don't want to miss anything out so I'm going to subscribe to this thread too

When I had Luke he was an emergency c/s, so I know I won't be completely exhausted & out of it after labouring for 3 days beforehand & with numerous drugs in my body.
I know I want the skin to skin contact as he was just taken from me & then Ex DH took him downstairs to meet everyone & I was stuck being sewn up by myself & missed everyones reactions to seeing him for the first time

So like you, I'm going to ask that noone gets to meet the baby until he/she is in the ward with me so I can share their first reactions as well

I'm going to ask about having the baby with me in recovery... and also about delayed cord clamping (and for DH to do it).

I'd love to ask for the screen to be lowered (wow julieannjules! I didn't know this was an option) - and my main one is being able to try & feed as soon as possible as it was really delayed with Luke (After I came out of recovery) & it was an issue for the first few days to get him to attach. May not have been the complete reason why but its important to me to make sure I can do this as soon as I can.

We already have our date booked in (about 10 days earlier) - for a few reasons... Dr S is a busy man & I want to make sure there is absolutely no way I run the risk of getting another doctor (I know this is minimal as a private patient, but he is the only one I trust now after so many issues with surgeries in the past) - and its also booked in early as he is concerned about my uterus holding up with all of the damage with a baby if it gets too big

We haven't told too many people the date (BB people, but that doesn't count ) - but obviously there are some people, for example my mum as I'll need her here to have Luke as our baby will be delivered in a hospital 2 hrs from our house
We've elected for DH to stay in hospital with me - one so he can help picking bub up etc & also so he is part of everything.

I can't think of anything else just yet, but desperately trying to think of more before Tuesday at our next OB appointment

ETA - AND SUSE!!!!!

[suse]

I was thinking the same thing about not sharing the date, though at least *someone* will have to know because I'll need a pair of hands to look after the kids. One thing that I have already made clear is that I will be introducing the new baby. Noone is to visit, including Z & J, until I am on the ward with my baby. I missed out on seeing family's reactions to my first two & I don't want to do that again.

We've told mum that we'll either be 'booking' her for weekly babysitting duties towards the end of the pregnancy (that will coincide with the date), or we'll tell her the night before. She looks after E a fair bit during the day now so it's nothing out of the ordinary for her. Fortunately all of our family is interstate or two hours drive away, so no sneaky visits until we tell them. As far as everyone else is concerned, it will be a normal birth, in that it won't have have a scheduled date.

As for the screen - last time we could see everything in the reflection from the lights anyway, the screen was a bit pointless. It was quite fascinating really.

[Michelle71]

Sarah - congratulations on your decision!! My only c-section experience I was unconscious for so not much help really. There are some great suggestions though.

Mainly sneaking in to say Suse - Another one around the same time

[Janie]

A friend of mine recently had her second c/s, she was most concerned about being apart from baby while in recovery, as she found that to be very traumatic after her DS's birth. But her hospital had changed their procedures, and this time her baby and husband stayed with her the whole time! She was so happy, said it made an enormous difference . Definitely something to push for, if you feel comfortable doing so .

Good luck ladies!

[paradise lost]

Sarah, many congrats again and congratulations too on finding the birthing direction you want to take.

I don't know if this would appeal/interest you, i think i talked about it ages ago on BB, but you could see if they can do a gentle c-s for you and babe? It's where they deliver just the head, and then the body to the chest, and then the rest, to mimic the slowness of VB, then immediate skin-to-skin on mama with the cord left unless there is a compelling reason to cut it etc. etc. If they lower the screen you can see babe emerge bit by bit, and babe gets more of a "clue" what's happening and apparently they can be more alert immediately after birth due to that.

There are some UK obs who do it, i'm not sure how widepread it is internationally.

TBH you are quite early on (i assume! lol) and i think you should think what YOUR ideal is and then talk to the Obs about getting it. Tell them that you feel their help (surgical) is what you need most and youd be grateful for them to work with you to give you and babe a really empowering, peaceful, loving birth - i bet they don't get requests like that very often, you might find they are really open to helping you achieve your goals.

Best of luck sorting out the fineprint hun, and congratulations once again on your little natural miracle!

Bxxx

SUSE! *whispers* congrats!

[Tanya]

Congrats on coming to a decision, Sarah.

I will be keeping an eye on your thread to see what you and Suse come up with to have an beautiful empowered birth.

xx

[maz]

SUSE!!!! you sneaky girls!!!!!!

Sarah - after having 2 emergency c/s with the first 2 I wanted to take control over our next one with V.

I have to have a GA due to make problems and not being able to get the epi or spinal needle in my back.

We had written into our notes that Jed is to be near so he can have the 'baby' as soon as she was born. I was to have my baby and husband in recovery as soon as I awoke, groggy or not and I wanted skin to skin contact so we could bond and I could attempt breast feeding.

V's birth was the most beautiful out of all my children because of it.
I went into labour and as my pelvis is twisted due to a work place injury I am unable to give birth naturally . I begged and begged and honestly it does me no good cause no baby can come out that shoot. Labour started at midnight...V was born via GA emergency c/s at 3.40am.
I woke at 4.30 amish and had Jed standing next to me in recovery and handed me V. The midwife was with us and the 3 of us were crying like dorks. She attatched straight away and snuggled in as if I had just birthed her 5 mins before hand.
We had asked for her to be unwashed so I could have 'that' natural sent and feel with her and it was wonderful.
I had NO PAIN after the c/s what so ever. Honestly..nothing.

Yet I planned number 4 c/s with M and it was nothing to what I wanted no photo's in theater, no skin on skin afterwards, no baby straight away, no breast feeding...just me sitting up smiling that I had had my baby but crying because he was so sick and all I wanted to do was hold him. I must of looked like a craze woman...big shiat eating grin yet tears streaming down my face and sobbing. Ahh the drugs..I'll blame it one them.

I think yourve choosen the perfect time Sarah to plan it out. I really think you need to write down everything that you want, take things from here and stuff from there. That way you wont forget anything at all. Try taking things you wnated and didnt get out of your other birth's and make sure you put them down and work from there.

Oh and another thing....we told people our c/s was the day AFTER the actual date because you need that first day for yourselves.

honey.....Im so excited your expecting another beautiful addition to your family.