How do I phase out BF gently? Need to get AF back so can TTC

[Honeybee]

Hi everyone

I'm in a bit of a quandry. DS is almost a year old. I have been combining BF and bottle feeding due to low milk supply since he was 3 months old.

I don't really BF during the day, except to get DS to sleep for his afternoon nap. I also BF him to sleep at night. When he wakes at night he comes into bed with me and BFs as much as he likes.

If I try to get him to sleep without BF (I walk him) he screams his head off until I BF him, then often he will fall asleep in seconds. I think he is addicted to the boob as his way of falling asleep. Often it's not really BF at all - just comfort sucking.

This is all fine with me, except that I still haven't got AF back and I am getting very anxious about TTC again. I am almost 35 and had to have assistance to conceive DS. I know that the clock is really ticking for me if I want another baby and especially if I want to have the option of a third.

I can't get any useful advice - because I won't do controlled crying and that's pretty much all anyone suggests. I'd be happy to continue to BF him to sleep until he gets sick of it, except that I really need my cycles to come back asap. I feel awful wanting to take his source of comfort away, but I also really want another baby.

Does anyone have any advice for how to start some gentle weaning, or how to get babies who are addicted to the boob to fall asleep without it? I don't think he gets much milk from me, it's more that he needs to comfort suck to sleep.

Is there any way I can help AF to come back without totally weaning him?

Any advice will be greatly appreciated.

xxx

[teruteru]

im not great with advices so I wont try.

DS (almost 16mths) is still BF round the clock, he doesnt sleep thru and feeds during the night as well. But ive gotten my AF back a few months ago. Partly because I have work 1 day a week but I was really thinking that I needed to wean him so we could TTC again.

sorry for the rambling, but what im trying to say is that she'll come back and you wont need to wean him completely. Hope you find a solution soon and Good Luck on TTC!!

Oh, and you can fall pg without AF as ive been told many times.

[onthefly]

Have you read Pantley's No Cry Sleep Solution? She has some good suggestions for helping with this.

You can try cutting feeds shorter and shorter. Or delaying them further and further.
Or you can try getting your DH to settle in the night, rather than you. That's the only thing that worked for us.

You probably don't have to wean completely to get af back, but you may have to cut back on the night feeds, cause that's when prolactin is higher. We cut out night feeds at 14 months, and cut back day feeds also to 3, then af returned at 16.5m.

Just note, this may get af back but probably won't stop your little one waking. It might seem like it's just comfort sucking, but he is getting milk and may well be hungry and/or thirsty. When we cut out night feeds we had to start giving DS bananas in the middle of the night . Like you, I wanted to cut back to get af back, otherwise I would have just gone back to breastfeeds cause that was much easier

Good luck!

[Sterla]

Have you tried the book "No Cry Sleep Solutions"? I'm slowly reading through it now (not very far in), and from what I've heard it's really good for overcoming feeding to sleep associations.

HTH

[Winter]

:yeahthat:

The Pantley Pull-Off has worked for us.

at feeding A bananas in the middle of the night Marcey!

[onthefly]

The PPO did not work for my little booby addict
And yeah, I felt pretty silly feeding my son bananas in the middle of the night - and all to try and get my period!

[Honeybee]

Thanks so much everyone. I do have the No Cry Sleep Solution, but I got really put off by all the sleep logs etc - it just seemed too hard even to start. I'm sure it does work if you commit to it though.

I am reassured to hear that the most important thing will be to cut out the night feeds, and perhaps I could still BF during the day.

I'm sure he is getting milk during the night, and perhaps more than I think. We do give him a bottle during the night as well, if he seems unsatisfied by the breast.

We have started giving DS supper most nights - some apple and custard just before sleep to try to fill him up a bit. He still likes his very early morning BFs though.

We are heading off overseas in a week, and I have decided that I will really start this process once we get back. I'm dreading it though, it feels really mean.

Thanks again
xx

[Junglemum]

i never used the sleep logs in the book, but i did use some of the methods suggested, like the one to help a baby wean off feeding to sleep. Don't be put off by the logs, just skip to the chapters that are relevant to you.