My DD loves to suck, so of course the dummy is her best friend. At nearly 8 weeks, we are still trying to establish proper breast feeding, and I think she may suffer nipple confusion.
I have been to the BF clinic twice, where they told me to take away any bottles, nipple shields and dummies. This seemed to work, and our feeding got back on track. I then gave her back the dummy after a week as she settles much better with it, and has such a strong suck reflex.
Now when she feeds, she will constanly pull off and scream whilst I am trying to attach her. I know she can feed perfectly, and by this I mean stay attached and drain the breast for at least 20 minutes. Does this sound like nipple confusion?? Is there any way to fix this, besides taking the dummy away? Or do I just have to bite the bullet and say no dummy??? And when would be a good time to try and reintroduce the dummy, if at all?
Thanks for reading, and any insights would be greatly appreciated xo
Hun, what happens after she pulls off and screams? Do you get her attached? It is hard to know what is going on, but if feeds are easier when she doesn't have a dummy then the dummy probably is the cause. There are other reasons why she might pull off and scream - fast flow, slow let down, pain, not being hungry etc, but these would be the same whether you are using the dummy or not.
If it is nipple confusion, generally once a baby is a bit older this will stop and you can reintroduce the dummy.
What happens when you don't use the dummy? Does she settle at all? How many feeds would you say she is having in 24 hours?
Congratulations on your beautiful daughter and a big WELL DONE for perservering with breast feeding you're doing a fantastic job
I personally prefer no dummies at all - however lots of people successfully combine breastfeeding and dummy use If you're at all doubtful though, it might be best to just get rid of it altogether. Lots of babies don't have any problem with switching between nipple, dummy, teat, etc - but some babies are really picky about what they like. Some suggestions for helping her stick to the boob are: giving her constant access to the breast, letting her feed until she falls asleep, and letting her come off the breast by herself.
Is she arching her back at all, when she's pulling off and screaming? If she is, perhaps look into whether she might have reflux - which can be dealt with fairly easily, without having to stop breastfeeding
Another thing could be trying to do baby-led attachment - go skin-to-skin, holding your baby in the classic way, and gently moving until your nipple is pointing to her upper lip and then letting her attach herself. This is probably very diferent from how the breastfeeding clinics etc have shown you - but the thing about breastfeeding is that it is a relationship between mother and baby, and whatever way works for you is the right way to do it
Sometimes having a nice warm bath together can help facilitate successful attachment too, mum and bubs both being relaxed, and the all-important skin-to-skin contact.
Remember too - it's still early days and you're both still learning and getting used to this whole breastfeeding thing! You'll both get the hang of it very soon, and it will all fall into place for you Big hugs to you both xoxo
Hi MantaRay.Thanks for getting to me so quickly Generally when she pulls off screaming, I just persist, and get her reattached eventually through the screams. My gut tells me that it is the dummy that is the cause. She generally has 6 to 7 feeds in 24 hours, and she seems to take more when there is no dummy. Her last feed for the night is at about 9, and she will pretty much settle straight away with or without the dummy. She wakes at about 3, and settling takes longer after this feed, and again, made much easier with the dummy. During the day, she wont sleep unless she is rocked in my arms, but, she will go down in her cot if she has the dummy.
I'm really at a loss here, cos she will either sleep well or feed well, but not both! I'm trying so hard to keep BF, but how long should it take to establish?? Surely we should have it together by now!
You are doing really well hun. Hopefully things will get easier soon
I am a firm believer in mums' instincts, so I think following your gut is the way to go. Many babies that age have 8 or more feeds in 24 hours, so perhaps you could try not using the dummy, and squeezing an extra feed in instead to see what happens? Some times just a minor change to the routine can make a difference. Does that sound do-able?
hey, i'm going thru a similar scenario, wondering the same things, but throwing into the mix the fact that i have been giving EBM in a bottle at times, and also formula at times, and also he has thrush that i haven't been able to get rid of, so i really have NO IDEA why he feeds well sometimes (thru the night) and during the day comes off and screams, and re-attaches then cries again... i feel like his mouth is sore, but then why does he feed okay in the middle of the night.... so what happens is i give up on the feed and give him the dummy, however if i gave him a bottle he would drink, so i really have no idea...
he is 7 weeks and i thought we'd have things established now too.... sometimes i want to give up, as during the day which is when we are out, i never know if he is going to feed, and if he doesn't, it means i have a cranky hungry baby to try to console while i am busy trying to get things done, whereas if i had a bottle i could feed him.... so the whole convenience/ease factor of breast feeding while we are out and about goes out the window, as its just not happening.
i'm going to give it a few more weeks then re-assess the situation.
Have you tried wearing her in a sling during the day to help with settling? It sounds like your instincts are probably correct on the dummy, so perhaps you could try techniques for settling her that don't involve the dummy for a while, and see if you can work on that on its own.
Sounds like you're reading your baby beautifully though!
Thanks for all the advice girls. We have been dummyless almost 2 days now! I'll admit there have been moments where i've nearly caved, but I've held strong. She is still screaming before she attaches, but once she is on, she has a good feed.
MantaRay - I would have to wake her to get an extra feed in. I am currently demand feeding as she is a big girl (5.6kg) so am letting her set the pace.
Emma - I know exactly how you feel! Hope things are getting better for you
Jennifer - DD will only sleep in the sling if I am walking out and about, she wont just around the house. Atm, during the day I have to rock her to sleep. I am quite worried that she will get used to this though. I have tried to put her down in the cot 3 times today awake with no dummy, but she only screams at me, so then i rock her.
Marcellus - good to know it can take some time, and we're not alone!
There is a breast feeding drop in centre near me, so I am going to go to that tomorrow to see what the LC thinks is going on. I just really want to get this sorted, for both our sakes.
I'm glad the no-dummy is helping with the feeding - you're a clever Mummy to have figured it out and trust your instincts.
Re the worry as to rocking/holding her to sleep. Just remember, she's only very small still. Eight weeks ago she was rocked/held/continuously fed 24 hrs a day, 7 days a week. I doubt you're holding her even as much as 12 hours a day, so considering she has halved the amount of time she was used to being 'cuddled' is significant! Babies grow out of their need to be held and comforted as they get older. Nothing you are doing to provide that reassurance will stop her detaching when she is ready. In fact, the opposite may very well be true. A baby that is secure in its attachment and knows it can depend on you for comfort is likely to be much more settled as she grows.
Personality comes into it, but it sounds like you are being careful to meet your little one's needs now, and that's the most important thing.
Good work Manhattan!
Have to second what Jen said re rocking etc. DS was like that - we could not put him down at all for the first 8-9 weeks. But you know what? By 12 weeks he could put himself to sleep in the cot. (ok, it didn't last very long, but that's another story)
Just do what she needs you to do now. It'll all change so quickly.
Just an update on where we are at - DD has been diagnosed with silent reflux, which is why she initially refuses to feed as it hurts her, and when I try to put her to the breast, she only remembers the pain. Poor little DD, but at least now we know, and can treat it.
Jennifer and Marcellus - thank you for your reassurances about settling. Jen, what you said makes so much sense, and no one has put it that way to me before. Glad to know that I am not alone, and that following my insticts is the right thing to do.
Thanks again to you all, your advice is very much appreciated xo
Nipple Confusion
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you're doing a fantastic job 
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