My son loves his dad and I am really happy about that. However listening to the constant 'daddy do it' and all the affection that daddy gets with me getting little look in really hurts. I start to doubt myself and whether I'm a bad parent. I know it is natural to favour the parent that is least at home but even when I come back from work he won't give me a cuddle. Does anyone else go through this?
I totally know what you mean. DS has just started this. I'm thinking hey I carried you for 9 months, gave birth, breastfed you and got up to you a million times month and now it is all Daddy, Daddy, Daddy. I wasn't even allowed to read a bedtime story last night I got told 'no Daddy read it' (lol)I think it is do normal for kids to favour a parent and before you know it you'll be the favourite again.
Sam has always adored his daddy... At first it was great, then just understandable because daddy spent so much time at work... then it became downright annoying and I just sat back and figured I'd get a look in once daddy was the full-time stay at home parent and I was back at work.
Not so much!
But... I'm off work today with a sore throat (nothing worse than a sore throat for a teacher) and was trying to just stay out of the way so as not to mess up the routine for the boys too much... And Sam just refused to go down for his morning nap for daddy... After a while daddy gave up, Sam was handed to me and happily went to sleep inside of two minutes!
There's still moments for us when nothing other than mummy will do - and I savour them when they happen, because it's mostly daddy that he wants.
But it does cut to the core when you take Sam away from daddy so daddy can get 5 minutes break to go to the toilet in peace and your child just screams in your arms until daddy takes him again.
We will be away from DH for 3 weeks soon and im not really looking forward to it.. i hope he just adjust easily because my brother & dad will be around.
Thanks ladies. I think I take it too personally but it is hard when all you hear is daddy, daddy, daddy!!! He's a very independent little boy now so he doesn't need me as much.
Butterfly warrior, I'm a teacher too and have had the day off today because of a sore throat. It's a virus going around at the moment, very pleasant!
Interesting that you say it's a virus going around. I took today off as well - was our cross country carnival and even though I'm fine apart from the throat, I didn't think sitting outside in the dust and heat (forecast was 34 for today) would do me any good.
Will say one thing - picking up Sam from daycare certainly shows that even though he seems to prefer daddy, he does love mummy too. I hope you get some moments like that soon.
I've been through this- I wrote a post about it a few months ago about how much DS seemed to prefer his Daddy. It really does hurt!
But now matters have swung the other way in our house and its all about mummy- which is really nice, but I can't even go to the toilet alone!
I guess they just kind of swing back and forth and we have to not take it personally when we're not in favour, and enjoy it when we are!
(although for those of you with boys, all the reading I've done suggests that when they get to around 3 or 4, they really do start to look more to Dad in a deeper and more permanent way as they start to develop their male identity, and we as mums need to try to not cling on to them....boy that's going to be hard!!)
oh i feel for u.
my bub is obviously to young to do this yet but if she did i know it would really upset me
i mean i carried her for 9 months i went through the birth i fed her and got up to her millions of times, i was there for her a lot more than DF .
All i can say is hang in there, spend as much time as u can with ur little one and hope that this is a phase and u will be the fav soon
Ur a great mum and doing an awesome job just remember that
Well, my 16 month old is all about Daddy.. yeah its all fine when DH is at work, although even when he is at work, I still get pushed aside sometimes... DH never gets pushed away.. DS will cuddle DH and choose him over me ALL the time, when he is hurt or just wanting to play.. It hurts so much... Plus I am expecting again, so the hormones are just out of control.. and Its really starting to upset me... I know that is probably just a phase and I know that because I am always home, he will favour DH more... still hurts though..
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DS favouring dad, gee it hurts!
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