thread: Partners with ADD - forgetfulness etc

  1. #1
    Lucy in the sky with diamonds.

    Jan 2005
    Funky Town, Vic
    7,070

    Partners with ADD - forgetfulness etc

    Peeling off from the Passive Aggression thread...

    Dealing with a partner with adult ADD can be terribly hard. Whilst it may seem they are either PA, rude, dismissive or just don't care about you this may not be true.

    What are the issues you have in this situation, how do you deal with it?

  2. #2
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Jun 2008
    In snuggle land
    4,499

    I don't have a partner with ADD, but have ADD myself. I was reading that in the PA thread and thought, yes it can be confusing - what is deliberate (PA) and what isn't (ADD). ADD behaviour could be perceived as malicious, when often it's uncontrollable distraction/inability to judge time or plan. eg, it take sme 90-120 minutes to get ready most mornings, which includes getting distracted by a myriad of things. I actually changed my work hours to take it into account.

    Will be tentatively coming back to read this thread. I've read "support" stuff for partner's of ADDers before and got really depressed. I think the main issues to deal with are 1) are they aware they have ADD? and 2) how to they handle it?

    My best driend's DH probably has ADD, but when she finally got him to a GP for diagnosis, it was dismissed. The crap she's had to deal with over 10 years of marriage is unbelievable and I don't know why she's still with him - can't handle money, racks up enormous debt, can't delay gratification, kept starting different uni courses and not finishing them, getting bored at jobs and quitting, exaserpating their financial problames, and eventually going bankrupt. This as well as an addiction to Wow, severe depression and the list goes on.....

  3. #3
    Registered User
    Add fionas on Facebook

    Apr 2007
    Recently treechanged to Woodend, VIC
    3,473

    just subscribing - BBL as I may write a novel.

    Thanks for starting the thread Lulu!!!

  4. #4
    Lucy in the sky with diamonds.

    Jan 2005
    Funky Town, Vic
    7,070

    I'll move your post over from the other thread Fi.

    Dr Phil did an AWESOME show on this recently, everything applied to xp to a t - and it made me feel differently towards him in a few ways.

    Tashy, I think you would be wonderful helping us out in here.

  5. #5
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Jun 2005
    Blue Mountains
    5,086

    I'm just subbing for now too.. kinda got my vent out in the other thread LOL.. but will definitely be contributing in here! Thanks Lulu

    Would love to hear & share strategies on living with it. DH isn't on any medication.. he got himself off it cos he didn't like the feeling on it. He does have bad "cloudy" days and he hates it. He's not too bad in general.. just the usual frustrating stuff like not finishing things or interrupting things all the time.