DS is 4 and going to school next year.
He goes to kinder, went to 3yo last year and has been to daycare since an early age.
We are always told by carers that he makes friends easily, plays well generally other than the normal boy things, likes to be in charge, can be bossy but not over the top.
He is also very good at things like puzzles, likes to draw etc so he can sit and do something on his own for 30 mins easily
But 4yo kinder teacher calls us aside and says he's not resiliant. he gets hurt easily if the children say things to him.
I'm not sure what to do about this, or why if its a problem its taken 4 years to notice (or if its new?)
He also has begin doing sign language sometimes instead of talking to us (his own made up sign language not one hes been taught) ut wil use the corect words if i ignore the signing or ask him to
Whats waoorying me the most is this though:
We will be outside, say getting in to the car to go somewhere, or going for a walk, and someone walk by miding their own buiness.
DS will pipe up with 'Look at that stupid ugly man mum' loud enough to be heard by anyone on the street including the person in question.
When we go to my parents place, sometimes he will stand outside and refuse to come in. Other times (60%?) its fine.
He has no idea how to play with kids at the park if he doesnt know them, sometimes he will growl at them and make tiger claws! but hes really social once hes met them say 2 times or more. Now I'm, really quite shy, so I dont know if its just that he takes a while to comeo out of his shell? I think it must be becuase he always makes friends at kinder, creche etc?
I dont know what to do.
Kinder teacher also says he is behind in motor skills because he cant use scissors. I thought this was normal, esp. since they werent allowed to use the scissors at 3yo kinder? hes left handed, and no he doesnt use them that well but we've been trying since she mentioned it and he is getting better. Hes also much better at holding a pencil now, but will still sometimes do mirror writing.
Mum (my mum) is worried he is dyslexic but I'd heard it was not uncommon for left handed kids to do this at an early age?
I guess Im worried they will say hes not ready for school, but he as an above average vocab, maths etc, hes just a bit behind on using scissors and writing - no more than half the kids i went to school with?
DD1 is also 4 and will also get upset and hurt by things people say to her. I think at this age they do get quite sensitive as they are starting to understand feelings more and also the power that you can weild against others with these feelings. They don't fully understand empathy either so they do say and do things that hurt others.
I have found that she is going through a "silly" phase where she will say things like "that person is a bumbum throw them in the bin" loudly so that the person hears. I think she does it to get a reaction. I just tell her it isn't nice and I don't like hearing her say those kids of things.
It does sound like the tiger growling could be a shyness thing. If he isn't comfortable approaching kids he doesn't know or doesn't know what to say to start playing with them maybe do some role playing with him to get him to practice saying hello and asking names.
My 5 year old is very emtional her teachers call it, alot of things get her very upset and she worries way more then a child should.
Every child is dif, and i have heard that scissors skills for a lefty can take a while to get. Unfor with teachers now a days everything is lumped into the average catagory, well to get that average a few have to be a bit behind and a few a bit ahead.
I think if it wasnt something you were worried about b4 and its only just now they have picked up on it i wouldnt stress too much, as a parent you can concentrate on those areas for a while and see if he improves.. it may just be the activity has nevr interested him therefore he hasnt done it often enough to develop the skill
He sounds ok to me, alot like my 4yr old, he is very sensitive and easy to get hurt , but hes very rough and tumble too, but he wont hit back if somebody hurts him. He has moments when hes really stupid silly and inapropriate and alot of the time he wont "call" people when we ask him to ( say hello to my boss etc) he has to do things a certain way or not at all. these are all normal things. I know left handers take abit extra time to do some things and some never write nicely. I went to school with a boy who was a lefty and his writing was almost unreadable but his was very very clever, he finished H.S at 15 and went to uni -that kinda clever. dyslexia isnt a propblem if you get extra help for the kids- its just a different way to think and process informationa nd its alittle early to be worring too much about that, but if your really worried contact a dyslexia agency in your area and talk to them, it'll help put your/ your mothers mind at ease
My nearly four yo sounds very similar.
She's very 'emotional' about lots of stuff....a drama queen really. Gets hurt at the slightest thing. Funny though her teachers put it down to her not having older siblings - she just wasn't used to it. They never said it was wrong
Similary she's been through a signing phase recently. I think it's just them figuring out that communication doesn't have to be via speaking alone - just a new discovery from inquisitive little minds (well as annoying as it was that's what I kept telling myself).
She also does oddly unsocial things and says weird things....just testing the (my lol) boundaries I reckon. No-one actually tells them what they 'can' say so they're figuring out how it all goes together.
As for the scissors and the mirror writing. DD and I are both very left handed. My mum was a leftie too and so that's the only way I've been taught. Scissors hurt when you are a leftie...they feel weird, they aren't made to be used in the left hand. Fiskars make some great kids spring scissors without the finger loops. I have a pair and I'm trying to find DD some - makes life much easier. I can also mirror write at the drop of a hat - and I've been writing for years. DD often copies letter I write in reverse. I'm not dislexic. They don't understand the rules of left to right, top to bottom straight away. To them, the letters are still just shapes.
He sounds like a great imaginitive little guy hun.
Thanks everyone. I feel a bit better now.
yes the scissors we are working on. His Kinder teacher sent home a pairo f scissors that are spring loaded and supposedly dual hand, but the paper just slides between the blades? So I mgiht just buy some left handed scissors myself and try those. He is getting better though so its a good sign and he is starting to try to hold the pencil/crayone the right way on his own with less frustration.
I worry about him having LH scissors or anything "different" at school though..I know how kids are..
dont get different scissors get some that have the same size holes as handles then its not "different"
the growling is SOOOO normal in our house!
DS usual responce to people is " im 4" haha thats it doesnt matter what they say its just "im 4"
i think that the teacher has said something shouldnt mean its a bad thing.. not everyone is resiliant! just work with your DS and give him some tools to use when he is hurt by others...
yeah, dont get left handed scissors. just the ones with the same size and shape holes on each handle. the spring loaded ones are pretty good, so it might just take a bit of practice.
I cant eve work the spring loaded ones myself htough and Im right handed? The issue is the baldes are teh wrong way around htough how does that have to do with the holes? Im confused? Does that mean they are universal?
hmm. you may have a point there. i never thought about the blades thing. my DD1 is a lefty and i just use the kiddy scissors like i described above. i guess cause on normal scissors there is a hole/handle that is longer to fit all your fingers in and the other side is the round one for your thumb. because of this you cant flip them around to use backwards... but if both sides are the same you can. therefore putting the cutting blade at the top or bottom depending on how you hold them.. ??
dunno if that made sense or is even true its just what i always thought without investigating it properly. LOL
4 year old behaviour? or not...
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