Our cat Elf went missing a few days ago...

[Ryatha]

and we just found her on the side of the freeway

we haven't told DD2 yet, we're not sure how. She understands death pretty well, we have already lost 2 cats (really not a good record here) and she understood when my grandparents died. But we want to retrieve her so we can give her a proper burial but not sure if we should have DD2 to help us.

Just thought I would write a quick eulogy for her:

Elf was found as a young kitten on christmas morning by my bestfriend in her back yard. Her greyhound was sitting under the tree elf was in, hoping to have a cat-snack. My friend rescued her, cleaned her up and fed her. When we got back from holidays we adopted her, however our other cat was not impressed. Eventually they became the best of friends and hung out together all the time.

Elf was known to be a cuddly cat, she loved jumping into bed with me at bed time and trying to get between me and my book, no matter how close it was to my face. She had a very loud purr and loved everyone to death. Elf preferred to eat dog food rather than cat food to the great consternation of our Dog and loved to weave under our feet as we walked. Gentle with kids and tollerant of our Daschound she was such a lovely soul.

RIP Elf, I hope you continue to give everyone cuddles where ever you are. We will miss you.

[PumpkinZulu]

Oh no, I'm so sorry about your loss



RIP Elf, you sound like a lovely kitty who will be very much missed and remembered.

[nickle730]

Poor Elf! I hope she is chasing butterflies and dining on premium steak in pussy cat heaven... RIP Elf.

Personally, I would let my kids help with the burial of our animals, but not with the retrieval. If Elf is particularly erm... messy (??) from the highway mishap then I would wrap her up in a towel before the kids are involved. I don't think they need to see their beloved pet in that state and I think it might encourage the disturbing idea that all death results in a bloody or violent end, which of course is not true. Just my own opinion.

I'm sorry you lost your pet, she sounds like a lovely pussy cat.

[Arimeh]

Oh no

I'm sorry

[tan32]

RIP Elf.

I too would want a little burial. I don't think i would take my kids to retrieve elf though it depended on what Elf looked like.
Hugs to you and your family .

[ElleJay]

I'm so sorry ryatha

[Jaycee]

Oh Cat, that's terrible, I am so sorry
RIP Elf
xxx

[Fleur]

I'm sorry Cat
RIP Elf

[Ryatha]

Thanks everyone

Either DH or I will head out and get her this afternoon. as far as DD1 knows, elf is living with another family. But we will need to tell her soon. I hate making her upset

[~Trish~]

I'm so sorry for the loss of your beautiful cat .

[ss_storm]

Sorry for your loss, RIP Elf

[Astrid]

we lost our beloved kitty early on in the year, she just disappeared and has not come back RIP Elf

[Phteven]

bye-bye Elf

[*Beema*]

Oh no I am so sorry hun RIP little Elf

[Ryatha]

Well, DH put the girls in the bath and I headed out and got Elf from the side of the road. There wasn't a single mark on her, just lying there

I've brought her home and took DD1 out to see her and say goodbye. She is very upset, in fact all of us are, except DD2 who is a bit puzzled by the tears and sad faces. She keeps smiling and waving at us.

Oh, today is just not a good day. We'll bury her in the back yard and get DD1 to make a little sign.

As I type this DD1 is calling both grandparents and telling them what has happened. I think it is helping her deal with her emotions. I hope so, I think like me she needs to talk about it. I just heard her ask if we can get a new cat to replace elf.

Now shes in with DD2 giving her cuddles. Now to put them both to bed.

[mrsmac]

Hugs to you all, our cat oscar was killed on our road after being missing for 3 days and i was devastated, even DH was upset (he buried him cause it was pretty messy he said).
I am glad she looked OK so that your kids could see her. Children do recover form these things quite quickly, I often have my class telling me about their pets who have died.

[Ryatha]

I guess we were lucky that she looked fine, but it was hard for her to understand she was dead when she looked like normal. I know she'll tell her teacher and all her friends tomorrow.

Well I just buried her in the back yard. DH is currently angry with me for telling DD1 and showing her. I just think he has too much grief on his hands right now, with elf and one of our friends who is suicidal ATM.

About to go into the sewing room and drown my sorrows in some sewing.

Thankyou everyone for the support. Animals in our family are family members and it is very hard when we loose one.

[ss_storm]

I think you did the right thing WRT involving DD1, unfortunately death is a part of life and I think it's better that she knows what happened to Elf and was involved in burying her and allowed to say her goodbye's, rather than being told Elf has gone missing and that's it. Brings some closure iykwim and will help her grieve and move on. I hope the days get better for you!