thread: custody

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Apr 2010
    1

    custody

    hey i was hoping to get a little advice,
    my sons dad left me once i fell pregnant and didn't show up till my son was 18 months with court papers wanting 50/50 custody, over 4 months he had my son from a few hours on a Saturday to over nights stay. the over nights lasted about 1 months then he said he couldn't have him over nights so only sees him on a Sunday, atm is has been going fine thou his dad is rarely there it is his parents seeing my son. but what if he brings up the 50/50 custody again anyone no his chances of getting it, atm he doesnt seem interested but im just preparing myself
    thanks

  2. #2
    Registered User

    May 2008
    where the V8's roar
    1,855

    My best advice would be to see a solicitor or ring Relationships Australia and get some legal advice. I would also have a book and document everything so that is the times your DS is with his grandparents as oppose to his father. Something to consider is allowing the grandparents access/visitation cause it sounds like they are the reason he wants custody and by-passing him might make them happy enough not to encourage him to apply for 50/50 access, I also don't think they (the grandparents that is) would be allowed 50/50 custody but they are allowed access. Just something to consider

  3. #3
    Lucy in the sky with diamonds.

    Jan 2005
    Funky Town, Vic
    7,070

    No worries, tell him to notify you of the court date and you will see him then.

    Please don't believe the hype of the 50/50 custody cases, it's only granted in something like 20% of cases. He certainly doesn't have a close relationship with his son to warrant it in any case AND he certainly doesn't actually WANT 50% custody because he can't handle the hours he sees him now.

    Take it as it is - a THREAT to get you to agree to give him access for his own convenience because you are worried about 50/50 - call the bluff and close the door in his face....

  4. #4
    Registered User

    May 2008
    camden, NSW
    52

    Really, dont worry to much about it. I had the same thing with my XP. He was determined to get 50/50 custody of our daughter (we were at court for the first time when she was 6 weeks old). The judge all but laughed at him.
    But definatly record EVERYTHING that happens, who has him, what times they have him, anything unusual that you notice or are concerned about, phone calls XP makes, anything that XP might contribute towards your son. Especially make sure you keep track of everytime he cancels his visitation.

    My DD1 is 5 and i have 5 diaries (1 for each year) so far that have recorded everything from day 1 of our negotiagtions about her care. Its come in very useful over the years when XP has wanted to be an idiot and tried to pull things over me.

    It might be in your interests though to arrange activities in your area, playgroups, swimming lessons, play dates, so that IF it does come to that, then you can just say that you have established friends for your son and he is used to doing these things with you at these times.