A little advice please :)

[MissM]

So, DD is 8yo and quite mature. There have been alot of stuff being said at school by other kids like 'this boy wants to have s*x with this person' and DD overhearing/being told this was said. I have addressed this issue with the teacher and so far and all is ok so far.

DD doesn't know that boys have a penis - she doesnt have any brothers, and she does not shower with other peoples children, and a few of my cousin's that are her age are girls. So I have never had to explain that whole 'boys are different to girls because blah blah' TBH - I have never thought it was important to even discuss it with her - Does she really NEED to know? IYKWIM?

We had the AF talk when she was about 3.5 cos she asked me why i was buying nappies for myself while in the sanitary isle!!! oh it was funny tho! Now she just makes fun of me and my moods and tells me to take a chill pill if i stress out!

Anyway - so today I was looking at a human body book and thought it was cool, i wanted to buy it for her but whie i was flicking through it there was FULL on pictures that I am not yet prepared for her to see. But it got me thinking - I would rather her talk about stuff like that with me rather than have some 8yo talk about it that doesnt know anything LOL I do have a very open and honest relationship with my daughter tho. I believe that honesty to a degree of their maturity and understanding needs to be taken into consideration when discussing issues.

So .....

Does anyone know of a good childrens book that explains the anatomy? (Any christian books that you know of?? If there are any?)

When did you explain to your children that boys and girls were different? (for those children who never grew up with the opposite sex)

Should I raise the issue or should I wait for her to ask? (If she wanted to know, she would ask, she knows she can ask me anything or tell me anything even if she thinks she will get into trouble)

When did you explain where babies come from? (I have told DD that the Dr cuts you open ... well In some cases they do!)

At what age did you have THE S*x talk? (not that I will go there for a few years at least!! LOL)

With all the suggetive ad's video clips and billboards etc, I dont want to give too much away before she's REALLY ready to know, but then i dont want her to 'miss' out on knowing things that her age group should know. (I am quite strict on what I let her watch)

[MrsFabuloso]

Honestly, I think 8 is a great age to start talking about sex, birth, puberty, anatomy ect...But, as you said to her age and ability of understanding. I don't have an 8yr old, but I have a nephew who is 9 and he is a very niave 9yr old. But he know's about puberty, anatomy and how sex works. I think alot of schools start teaching about it at around 10ish. I think total honesty and factual information is important. I have told my DD (3) and DS (21mths) what their parts are called (ie, not a 'fanny' or 'doodle', it's a vagina or penis). If you show that you are not phased by any of it and that it is a totally normal part of growing up, being a girl, or what ever then there won't be any problems.

[~me~]

I remember the book 'where did I come from' which is still available and the book 'are you there god it's me Margaret' written by Judy Blume, both these books are amazing books for a young one to learn sex education in a very sensible non fuss way. I read these when I was pre teen.
I just googled both books and they are available. Not sure if there are 'modern' versions of these books.
I have explained to my DS1 that boys have penis's and girls have vagina's. He has female cousins and they bath together quite a bit so explaining is crucial in our circumstances and of course explaining when it's appropriate to talk about these things. He also quite often asks questions about me 'breast feeding' DD (he often get's confused and calls it 'milking' and then I correct him).
I agree with lilias, 8 is a great age to start talking about sex, puberty and so on as these days girls can hit puberty too at a very early age.
Good luck with it all...something I have to look forward to.

[~clover~]

My DD1 is 8. She's known since she was 3 where babies come out. I never told her, she just knew somehow. My 5 yo DD knows as well.

They both know the difference between boys & girl, but more because of DH (showers etc), rather than DS. They knew that long before DS was born, there were always other kids/babies somewhere they saw naked.
DD1 doesn't know much about AF yet, but I do need to talk to her about it eventually. I was 10 when mum talked to me about it, so I think I'll do it about then.

I have no interest in her knowing anything about sex yet. She did ask once, 2 years ago. I simply told her it was what mum's & dad's do to have babies. I think she may think she knows a little more, but When I announced this pregnancy her response was 'ew! you did sex!' She has seen dogs at it & knows what it is then (thanks DH )

She knows she can ask me anything, & she does. I don't believe in her knowing too much just yet though. A good friend of mine knew too much before it was age appropriate, & I believe that had a massive part in her pormiscuity as a teen. Her parents were way too open & honest...I remember her bringing a not so nice magazine to school to show me when we were about 7. She taught me everything I knew! I know now it was nothing, but I knew quite a bit at 6....she knew alot more!

I don't have any advice on books, but will be looking into some soon myself

[MissM]

Thanks Ladies.

I will start my search for the books I have decided on Friday night we will have a girly night and I will talk to her about puberty and the changes her body will go through .... well at least that's a start

It's scary and a little overwhelming knowing my girl is growing up, and has gone so fast! I had my first period when I was 10 but then didn't have another one until 12 (regular from 12) so I have a feeling she too will start her AF early like i did. my younger sister, mother and grandmother both had theirs at 9 (scares me!!) so that's been on my mind too

[MissM]

I have no interest in her knowing anything about sex yet.

She knows she can ask me anything, & she does. I don't believe in her knowing too much just yet though. A good friend of mine knew too much before it was age appropriate, & I believe that had a massive part in her pormiscuity as a teen. Her parents were way too open & honest...I remember her bringing a not so nice magazine to school to show me when we were about 7. She taught me everything I knew! I know now it was nothing, but I knew quite a bit at 6....she knew alot more!

I agree Clover - I dont want her knowing too much about sex just yet. I think this generation knows too much and doesn't understand the consequences of their actions completely. She knows the word, she knows it is something I will explain to her when she gets older (and when she asks I will tell her) I also agree with the 'being too open and honest' my aunty is like that with her children and is rather vulgar about it. My aunty's 9 yr old knows what a C**k is DD will always ask me what something means if she doesn't know and is extremely respectful when I ask her not to repeat a word.

I have a younger sister and 2 brothers so I just knew growing up too, thats why i am a bit stumped at what to do lol Whereas DD is quite different. The only socialization she has is school and dance and the occasional visit to my family's (I tend not to have DD around them too often as their lifestyle and beliefs are WAY different to mine)