hi!
Currently, ds is in family daycare 3 days a week. Monday 7-4, Wednesday 7-6, Thursday 7-6. He is only there that late because I work evenings (230pm-10pm) every Thursday and every 2nd Wednesday, as well as one weekend 7am-2pm a fortnight, and dh doesn't get home til just before 6.
I am currently a first year uni student. I worked my first semester uni timetable around my work roster (it's the same every fortnight).
However, second semester I tried for the same sort of timetable. I am still there on a Monday, Wednesday mornings, every 2nd Thursday morning... but now, 2 hours every Friday. 12-2
At least 12-2 should be nap time.
I have realized that I did not study enough during my first semester (however, I did pass everything!) and have told dh that I need to study more - put more effort into it.
The daycare lady is very keen for ds to come full time (so, now Tuesdays and Fridays as well). She has her reasons...
Don't get me wrong, ds loves it there. She's a fantastic daycarer. She lives in our street -just 4 doors up! Her son is almost my sons age.
However, currently being on uni holidays, and sending ds to care, it's hard for me to be doing whatever I'm doing at home and knowing they're walking past, or at the playground or doing something that I should be doing with him. I'd like to see my son on Tuesdays. I'd like to spend sometime with him. I keep saying I didn't have a child to have someone else care for him.
I'm aware that other parents must struggle with the same thing, when they go to work.
My sister and my dh both say to put him in full time. Dh says to use Tuesdays as my day to study, my sister suggests to use it for a "me" day.
I am torn. I totally understand where they are coming from. But during study week, a teaching week with no classes so you can purely study, I did everything but. My house was the cleanest I have seen it, and there was food in the fridge coz I made something out of all the random ingredients I had.
I just don't know what to do. I feel like I'm rejecting him. Like I don't want to look after him, so you know what? Why not stick him in daycare?
I'm just so confused and frustrated and a little sad that both suggest it. I can study after hours when ds goes to bed maybe? I just don't know.
What do you do? Any suggestions? (btw - thanks for hangin' in there to read this )
I've put the kids into daycare on two ocassions when I needed the time to learn some choreography (for my second job). It felt odd to be dropping them off when I wasn't going straight to work in a mad dash afterwards.
On top of my two jobs I was also a student and I did my study when the kids went to bed - which usually gave me 2 - 4 hrs each evening (not that I needed to do that each night).
So my option is that I would study in the evening and spend the day with the little man on Tuesday :-)
Follow your instincts. You only get one chance at him being little. I personally think he is a little young for full time care. If you had to do it then well you wouldn't have a choice. If you don't have to do it and feel like you shouldn't then don't. Can your DH do more with him so he is still with a parent while you study? DH and I share care DS. He still does 3 days (8:30-3:30) at a kindy but now that we are moving I am dropping him back to 2 because 3 doesn't feel right to me even though I have to make up the study overnight. Alternatively can you drop a subject or take one externally so you can spend more time with him. 3 subjects is still a full time load for austudy. Big hugs. These decisions aren't easy.
I agree with Krysalyss,
I love my days with my kids, work 2 jobs and study. I fit the study in to days that DH can help out or after they go to bed. And a well used study week can go a long way.
They will never be this age again. Don't worry about what other say, do whats right for you.
Maybe the $$ that you would spend on daycare you could get a cleaner once a week and that would help free up study time? Just a thought
Personally I think if the daycare mum was worth her weight, she wouldn't be trying to convince you to have him in full time, but should be convincing you to do what you feel is right for you son. I personally wouldn't go for full time if I didn't absolutely have to - you only have them for such a short time, you don't want to look back with regrets. Do whatever your gut is telling you.
Last edited by Floweryfields; July 3rd, 2010 at 12:27 PM.
Don't put him just because it suits the carer better, do what's best for you. It sounds like you already know that you love having that day with him, and it's important to keep it going if you can. A cleaner is a good idea so you can study instead of clean when he does nap.
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