thread: A little advice on bedtime?

  1. #1

    Oct 2008
    2,880

    A little advice on bedtime?

    Hey guys,

    I have gotten our little one into a really good bedtime routine, and for the past 3 weeks, it has been working really well.

    However, the past 2 nights, she has been going to sleep at the usual time, but waking up 40 minutes later - so treating this like a nap really. I'm struggling to get her to go back to sleep - again, she seems to think that the first 40 minutes was a nap! Last night, for example she went over to sleep at 7pm, woke at 7.45pm and was awake until 9.30pm - she did go back to sleep then but it was sooo frustrating trying to get her to realise that it was still bedtime.

    Any ideas on what to do? Do I just roll with it and let her carry on (being baby led and all that) or do I try and push the issue of bedtime is bedtime?

    I had thought what I might do tonight is go into the bedroom 5 minutes before she is due to wake up and wait till she is stirring and then get her over to sleep again (by feeding which is how we get to sleep just now at night time).

    Your suggestions are very much appreciated!! I was getting so excited about the fact that she was going to bed at 7pm and DH and I were getting some time to ourselves!

    Thanks
    Sue xxx

  2. #2
    Registered User

    Oct 2008
    Newport, VIC
    1,885

    My little man is a great sleeper... for 40 minutes! We have this same issue for us and have had for a while.

    For us, bedtime is bedtime. We resettle him in his dark room. Now it doesn't take very long if he wakes at all.

    He will generally wake after 40 minutes if he's been awake for too long before bedtime. So when he has his bottle he crashes because he is so tired rather than falling to sleep properly.

    It's all swings and roundabouts. Your little one is still very little and could be changing, could be going through a phase or could be doing this for no good reason at all! I just go with it now.

    Best of luck.

  3. #3
    Registered User

    Jul 2005
    Sydney
    7,896

    It sounds like she's waking up after one sleep cycle. Have you tried pre-empting it, by going into her room beforehand and gently patting/resettling her when she stirs, rather than wait until she's fully awake? She might just need a little help to stay sleeping. Do you follow a pattern when you put her down (we did bath, bf, story, wrap, bed)? If she is waking for a bf, maybe try bfing in her darkened room and she will fall back asleep with the lack of stimulation.

    Otherwise, you could just go with the flow and wait for her to go back to the way she was doing things!

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Jun 2007
    ...not far enough away :)
    1,413

    ah prob not much help, but my DS2 has been doing this...at first when he was only a few months we just rolled with it as he would happily just look about til tired again. But now we really want him to know it's sleep time, so I go in and feed him to settle back to sleep in his room in the dark. If he starts to chat and not feed I put him back to bed to have a chat and when he starts to cry I go back in and try to feed again. This can take a little while but he soon realises if he's going to have a chat and play it's in bed....otherwise take the drink and go back to sleep. That's the plan anyway, works most times. My DS2 will also go to sleep whilst BF and then wake as soon as I put him down, so now I feed him then DH takes him into his room for cuddles and puts him to bed...this is to try and teach him to go to sleep without out a BF...I don't really care if that means going to sleep with a cuddle, at least DH and I can both do that.

  5. #5
    Registered User

    Nov 2008
    Perth, WA
    2,315

    I don't really have any tried and tested advice but wanted to offer some support. How does she wake? Is she upset so you need to go in and comfort her or happy? Can you leave her for a little bit and see if she resettles? If she doesn't, can you just redo what you just did before you put her down (e.g. cuddles, rocking etc) and see if that works? DS doesn't sleep for more than one sleep cycle during the day, but lately he's been waking up content to just lie there for a bit and occasionally, just occasionally, he'll go back to sleep again. I know day sleeps are different, but maybe the theory is the same???
    If it were me, I'd keep doing what you're doing, following the same bedtime routine and see how it goes for a little while longer. It sounds like you're doing a fantastic job of being a mum!

  6. #6
    Registered User

    Nov 2008
    Perth
    3,686

    We have the same problem and DD is 10.5 months!! She doesn't always do it though but it does happen quite a bit. I personally think it's just one of those things and we choose to just go with the flow.

    We do the same routine every night (and have done since she was only a couple of weeks old) but I think she's just a little unsettled some nights and therefore her sleep is disturbed. I know it's frustrating but I feel better thinking about how we go to bed - some nights it's early, some nights late. Sometimes I'm really tired, sometimes I'm not. Sometimes I need to read before I go to sleep, sometimes I just nod straight off. Why can't our babies be the same, IYKWIM?

    Usually when DD does this, she just needs a cuddle to relax her or sometimes extra milk. We just try all of our tricks and eventually something works! We did have one night recently though when she was super tired so she was in bed at 6.15pm (bedtime is usually 7-7.30). She played up until 8.30 when I gave up and just let her out to play in the lounge while we watched TV. She was so hypo, crawling around like a mad child and laughing all the time. DH and I ended up seeing the funny side in it all but we did wonder how on earth we would get her to sleep. Anyway, we tried again at 9.30pm and she went straight down and didn't wake until 9.30 the next morning Sometimes I think they just need to really find their sleepy feeling

    Continue with your routine and hopefully it'll just be a random occurrence.
    Last edited by Taurean; July 21st, 2010 at 11:47 AM.

  7. #7

    Oct 2008
    2,880

    Thanks everyone.

    What I'll try tonight is go into the room 5 minutes before i expect her to wake up and be ready for her stirring. Then I'll feed her again till she goes back over. We do the bedtime routine in our room, the lights are dim, she gets a massage, story, cuddle and then boobie. I put the dim light out for the feed so it's all done in the dark with just a little night light.

    Will let you all know how that goes tonight!!
    Sue xxxx

  8. #8

    Oct 2008
    2,880

    Well, she seems to have slept through her sleep cycle so far. She went down to bed at 6.45pm, fed for half an hour, and is still asleep at 8.20pm. I'm hanging around the bedroom so that I can deal with any potential wakenings quickly!!

    Thanks again everyone.
    Sue xx

  9. #9
    Registered User

    Nov 2008
    Perth
    3,686

    Yay!

    Go and relax hon, you've earned it!!

    Don't stress if it happens again, babies just sometimes do that. It can be annoying (especially when you are really looking forward to that time out!) but they do alter their 'routine' sometimes just to keep their mummys on their toes!

  10. #10
    BellyBelly Member

    Nov 2009
    Qld
    367

    At her age I wouldn't be to concerned with a bed 'time' as such, just more interested in a bed time routine, they don't start working more towards a clock time until about 6 months. Next week it will probably be different again, its just to keep us mummies on our toes. If they don't want to sleep then you probably wont get them to.

    DD2 is still changing her bed times, sometimes she goes down and stays down, other times wakes up and plays happily in her cot until she goes back to sleep and other times screams blue murder until someone gets her and she plays again till 10.30. Try to remember how much sleep she has gotten in the 24 hours, they tend to average out the same each day, so if they have longer day time naps they have less sleep during the night etc.

  11. #11

    Oct 2008
    2,880

    Yeah, the "time" can vary each night, depending on when she had her last nap of the day - so it's any time between 6.15pm-7.30pm but the routine stays the same. We seem to be getting there though and last night she stayed asleep till 12.35am!!!!! SUPERSTAR!

    Sue xxx