Second Baby: Anyone Feel MORE Clueless Than First Time Around?

[fionas]

Now why didn't anyone tell me that I might actually feel more clueless second time around huh?

With DD1 I think I basically stared at her 24 hours a day and got to know her hunger/tired signs pretty quickly and easily.

I don't get chance to do that with DD2 and I don't feel like I know her nearly as well as I did with DD1 who would only have to make one little movement and I would say "oh rightio, she's doing x which means y."

Probably doesn't help that I suspect DD2 has colic.

Don't get me wrong, I don't feel stressed. Actually quite relaxed as hey, they usually turn out alright in the end but just bemused by how inexperienced I feel rather than a wise, old mum.

[KatieRabbit]

No, definitely didn't feel wise old mum. Bit like having the first all over again in that new baby/new signs/new situations etc so have to start figuring it out all over again. But in a more relaxed fashion!

[black_rose]

I am doing it third time around and still feel the same as you! All three of them are so different. With dd1 I could work out what she wanted. Dd2 had colic so it was tricker, she ended up with a dummy for when she was really bad, other times she didn't want it. Both dh and I found it hard as she took a long time to settle at night and we couldn't take her out as she just screamed.

With ds he is obsessed with his dummy, and I seem to take a bit to work out what he wants. He has mild colic,he settles a bit easier than dd2 did.

You would think by now I would have it all worked out.

[fionas]

Funny you should say that blackrose - I think DD2 has colic which is why I think that I've doubted that I can read her signs. Penny dropped tonight that maybe she has colic that's why I'm confused because nothing I do seems to help. I too resorted to the dummy for the first time tonight which I'm not rapt about but DP is working night shifts this week so it's just me and the girls so something had to give.

[black_rose]

It's so hard isn't it, we were against the dummy too and tried so hard to avoid it but ds was getting very distressed. He likes being elevated as well, so if I can't hold him we use the swing

I hope you can work out what your dd needs soon.

[HotI]

My little one had colic until 13 weeks ish and i finally gave her a dummy which was really helpful. A couple of weeks ago, she just decided she didn't want it anymore and if we give it to her she just spits it out. So, a dummy doesn't have to be a long term thing. (Kinda wish she would still take it sometimes!)

[Ginger]

we struggled more the second time around. ds2 is just a fussier little individual, much more sensitive than his big brother - and for a few weeks we felt like we had no idea what we were doing!
it's weird cos i think we just expected ds2 to be exactly like ds1 and when he wasn't we were a bit dumbfounded. he had bad colic too, and my dh ended up puttting him in the HAB and doing laps around our house for about an hour every night just to stop the crying. ds1 hardly even cried!

[~Kim~]

Yep me too...and going back for another round feels just the same.

I think it's because the routine you had going gets all interrupted and you have to find your groove again, only you're finding it for four not three.