IVF timing advice

[MrsH]

Hello all, I have read through so many forum topics and have found them to be so helpful and inspirational

We are due to start our first IVF cycle after 2 and a bit years of trying and 2 failed IUI cycles. I have read that some people have awful side effects from IVF drugs - is this mainly from synadrel? I didn't feel like I had any side effects from the IUI drug dosage, I was emotional - although I have been quite emotional about having a baby even before starting on any drugs

I am at the stage were I really don't want to wait any longer, however I am a bridesmaide for one of my best friends weddings and I am worried it will all be too much. As much as I can work out egg collection would be just before the wedding and transfer would be just after. Should I wait? I love her and her hubby to be dearly and want to make sure they have the perfect wedding, but this is the most important thing in my life.

Should I wait or am I worried about nothing? Any advice or would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks

Me 31 DH 28
TTC 2+ years
Failed IUI #1
Failed IUI #2
Moving on to IVF

[Loula]

Welcome i am sorry you find yourself along the road of IVF

Unfortunately every women responds differently to the medication and they are so many varieties of cycles it's hard to say how each will respond.

I can tell you I know someone who had egg pick up (epu) a few days before her own wedding but no tf (transfer) due to overstimulating. (ohss)

You may be bloated and uncomfortable from epu. You may feel fine it's hard to say.

All 15 of my cycles were very different and progressively worse each epu.

Talk with your fs (fertility specialist)

[Lenny]

Hi MrsH. I pleased to hear you have already found some good information here.

Having a wedding to distract you might be a good thing, but i personally wouldn't do it because sometimes things don't go quite to plan and dates get moved slighty depending on how your body reacts to the drugs. I think it might cause a bit of unnecessary stress if your dates needed moving and epu was suddenly going to be on the wedding day.

I understand that this is hugely important, so I kind of agree with Loula. Talk to your FS and see what he/she thinks.

All the best

[Janie71]

Hi there,

My best friend got married around the time I was going through my stimulated cycle. In fact I had to do my trigger shot at 11pm during her reception. Personally I would not do it again. Firstly I was so sore and bloated as I was only a couple of days away from my egg pick up. I also had to be very aware of the time as you have to do your trigger shot at the right time. Then there was also the fact that I couldn't drink, may or may not be a big deal for you, but for me it would have been nice to have a few champers with my friend to celebrate.

However in saying that as well, it was all a sacrifice worth making as eventually I got my DD out of it - not on my stimulated cycle, but out of my first FET. I just feel really bad that I wasn't 'there' for my friend as my mind was fully focussed on my IVF cycle.

Good luck with everything. I hope you get your longed for baby soon.

Janie xxx

[Loula]

Reading the above post it reminded me that i did a cycle at the same time BIL got married, (not in the bridal party though!) i had to sit in the hot car for an hour while i inserted a P4 pessary! yuck, was not pleasent.

But if you are anything like me you wont want to waste a moment, its so hard to say.

[Lisa B]

The drugs didn't really affect my mood. The Syneral gave me a headache for the first few days only. I was a little bloated a couple of days before EPU and had mild period type cramps for about 3 days after EPU - some people don't get these cramps. My mood was affected by TTC and not really exacerbated by the drugs. I guess there was a bit more expectation with IVF because I knew that at least conception had taken place.

In regards to weddings - I was bridesmaid for my sister whilst I was on injections to stimulate ovulation (just prior to IVF). I could never do the injections myself and my injection was due during the photos. My sister who is a nurse did it for me in the toilet during a short break. It's kind of funny now....as we look back...me hitching up my dress and she injecting me in her white dress.

I was a bit like Loula and didn't want to waste any cycle/chance. It is really up to you, the risks you want to take with dates and times.

The other thing you could do is go on the pill (you will anyway if you do the Down Reg cycle) and stay on it for a week longer before starting the syneral. The extra week shouldn't hurt and it could help time your cycle to miss the wedding but allow a cycle to occur in that month.

[andi81]

Hi MrsH,

I would have to agree with the other girls, my first (and only so far) IVF cycle was very overwhelming. Lots of appointments, trying to fit it around work and other events was quite stressful. Like Lenny said "things don't always go to plan" - my predicted dates were out about a week so it's really hard to guess where you will be at. My personal experience with the drugs was being spaced out and forgetful, also the retrieval left me quite sore. Sorry to be negative but you don't need to have anymore stresses around as I'm sure you already realise - it's a real rollercoaster.

I've also been trying for 2 1/2 years and I know exactly what you mean when you say you don't want to wait any longer - each day you have to wait really sucks! But if you get all worked up and stressed out that's not going to be good for your chances either. Good luck with what you decide, I hope you're lucky and only need one go at it

[tippytoes]

Firstly Mrs H, I want to wish you all the best in deciding your path...
I was maid of honour at my sister's wedding whilst on my 2nd fresh cycle and I was fine. I kept it quiet cause I didn't want to distract from her but due to the bloating etc my family knew what was going on LOL. I had the EPU the day after the wedding and it was a nice distraction - actually that was our lucky EPU which resulted in our now 14 month old DS.
It is really hard to say how you will respond and OHSS is terrible if you get it (I never had it , but I have heard stories etc). There are a lot of appointments and remembering to take drugs at certain times. I do think however, you can do anything you put your mind to. With a supportive DH and FS I am sure you could manage. I understand the whole not wanting to wait anymore as well. I would say go for it!
All the best hun
Rach xx

[PollyA]

Just for another point of view,
My best friend was my bridesmaid and she got gastro,
She didn't come as planned for the make up or hair and had to leave early, I was a bit sad but now a few years later I am just really glad she was there.
LIfe has a funny way of changing our plans sometimes without asking, Imagine how you'd feel if you delayed the process and tehn something else happened to interfere.
All the best with your decision and everything that follows..

[MrsH]

Just wanted to say a BIG THANK YOU for all of the responses I had to my post x
It is so great to hear about your experiences and opinions.

I have only really discussed infertility/ IVF with 3 close friends - they are doing their best, but it doesn't help when they tell you to relax and it will just happen! I guess it would be hard to understand if you are not feeling it yourself.

The majority of my friends have babies/ children and as the years go on I am finding it harder to cope. Anyway I am yet to 100% decide whether to delay or start this month, so will have a chat with DH tonight and go from there.

Thank you once again you are all wonderful! May we all have lots of babies! he he or even just one!

Me 31 DH 28
TTC 2+ years
2 x Failed IUI
Moving onto IVF