DD1 not going to sleep until 10.30+ at night! PLS help!

[BrightSparkles]

Miss J (now 2yrs 3months) has had the same bedtime routine since she was a baby. We have always (with the exception of a few nights here and there when we have had things on) been put to bed at 7.30pm. We have dinner, bath, teeth, reading/quiet time then bed. As a baby she was sleeping through from about 5 months then not long ago we went through a stage of her waking anywhere up to 10 times a night but now... we put her to bed at 7.30pm and shes playing in her bed and not going to sleep until 10.30/11pm. She has been coming into our bed about 3am and going back to sleep which i'm happy to do but she is still waking at 5.30/6am. She is waking up tired and grumpy.

Does anyone have suggestions on how I can get her to sleep earlier? She needs her sleep. I have occasionally given her phernergan just so that she has a relatively good night sleep.
Any suggestions welcome - co sleeping full time isn't an option atm.

[thepixie]

Does she have a daytime nap? Maybe it's time to shorten or cut it... that might help her go to bed earlier (although I am dreading the day that nap goes out the window so I feel for you)

[jackrose]

I went through exactly the same thing with DD1 when she was your DD1's age! I think I have replied to your posts before with exactly the same statement as it seems our two DD's are very similar!!!

I tried a lot of things, ignoring it, discussing it, pleading, yelling. I tried adding a nap in the day, taking away naps, moving naps.... after playing around for a month or so, a friend lent me a book about sleep (can't remember at the moment but will try to get back) and basically it suggested she was not needing as much sleep at night anymore so try a later bedtime. This worked for me and now she goes to bed at 8-8.30 and we have our happy girl back who sleeps through, sleeps in to a reasonable time and is not overtired and challenging during the day.

The late falling asleep is a problem to overcome before you can do this though as she has effectively re-set her body clock now and her tired time is 10.30ish. I found with my DD that it didn't matter what the day involved, what her naps were etc, if she was put to bed she would not fall asleep till 10-11pm. I could see she was not being naughty, she just couldn't sleep. You know how you have those nights were you just lay there, eyes open, mind racing... frustrated... not sleeping. It killed me that she was learning to hate falling asleep at such a young age. This book suggested re-setting their clock by retraining them that falling asleep is easy. To do this you have to get them tired. This meant keeping DD up until 10-11 so that when she went to sleep she was out like a light. It worked first night. We then did this for a few nights making sure that she got up at the same time every day (7.30) and only had 1-1.5hr naps in the day - before 3pm so as not to muck up her night sleep. Then we begun to wind bedtime back by 15min every night until we got to 8.30. If DD did not fall asleep easily and relatively instantly we went back a step. So basically, it was a bad few days at the start to have a overtired toddler but it made sense and worked a treat!

Hope this makes sense to you - and even helps!

ETA: The book is "Solve your child's sleep problems" by Richard Ferber. It has a bit about settling infants and amounts to CIO which I did not agree with and thought was rather harsh (therefore would not recommend) but the stuff on sleep in toddlers and children was much more reasonable and gentle.

[Fruit Tingles]

I would remove all toys etc from her room, to make it boring for her. We have next to no toys in DD1s room (she has a seperate play room for all her toys) and I find it makes a HUGE difference.
Although, it doesnt stop her running to her toy room and sneaking toys in her room to have a midnight play
We don't have the same problem as what you are facing right now, but DD1 wakes at 10pm some nights and insists on us sitting and talking to her

I think its a stage?

Sorry, I havent been much of a help to you.

[LimeSlice]

Lose the day sleeps. Worked wonders here.
They get very grumpy by 4 to begin with but after a week or so they are falling asleep on their feet by 7:30 (mostly lol)
Also try turning tv etc off for at least. 30 mins before bedtime even if they aren't directly watching it. Curb what ever you are feeding at dinner ie cordials or other stimulants, fruits, etc.
[sorry so brief on my phone]

[ElleJay]

I know the feeling - DS (who's 13 months old) doesn't go to bed till 10pm alot of the time and it drives us nuts! Granted, I'm working till then and DH is the one dealing with it, it's very similar here too.
When you find out, lemme know, I could do with some help too

[BeautifulMadness]

so true....loosing the day sleep does wonders...my now 3 yr old lost his day sleep when he was 2 and now he goes to bed @8pm wakes @ 7.30am.

with the expection of bad Dreams,ghosts,monsters,flys,spiders and falling outta bed,...he sleeps great

[boomba]

I agree if we dont have day sleeps here for DS1 he is alseep early...if he has a day sleep he will stay up late if I let him. I would stop giving her the phenurgen(sp?) too as you dont want her to become dependant on that to sleep. what if you lay in the room with her till she falls asleep? It may only be for a few nights? I find this helps with Ds1.
Good luck

[BrightSparkles]

I agree if we dont have day sleeps here for DS1 he is alseep early...if he has a day sleep he will stay up late if I let him. I would stop giving her the phenurgen(sp?) too as you dont want her to become dependant on that to sleep. what if you lay in the room with her till she falls asleep? It may only be for a few nights? I find this helps with Ds1.
Good luck

I very rarely give phergan (maybe once every few weeks - when it is obvious she is completely exhausted and needs to have a good night sleep). I do lay in her room some nights, we read books etc.

Going to try shortening her daytime sleeps too.