DS has no idea what discipline is. He understands the word "no" when he wants to, but he just laughs if I tell him off (firm tone, yell - bad I know, smack - also bad I know, although we only do that if he is putting himself in immediate danger ie about to stick his finger in a power point ) nothings working. The more I ask/ tell him to stop something the more he laughs at me. Sometimes I wonder if he knows what he's doing and is just being evil and trying to hurt me. Is that crazy?
Is there anything I can do so he'll take it seriously or is it just something he'll eventually grow out of?
ETA- I'm not saying parents that yell and smack are bad parents, I know everyones been there now and then, just not the style I want to go with.
DS use to be the same at a young age too. We discipline the same.. they get a warning and if they continue to do whatever or be rude they will get a smack on the hand or time out. Have you tried just picking him up and putting him in his cot when hes laughing like that? I bet that would make him realise youre not playing. Just keep at it hun, keep consistant and he will eventually get it.
So just tell him no and distract him then? He's so darn determined, once he decides he wants to do something he keeps going back to it. Again. And again. And again. Repeat x50
oops to slow...
I'll give the cot thing a go, he keeps hitting me/ picking my nose/ trying to pull my lips off/ scratching me while feeding.
He's so young - when they're that young they're usually realising that they don't have to listen. It's not that he wants to 'be naughty' or anything, he's just realising that "hey, mum says stop but ... I don't actually have to... I can make my own decisions and keep doing this... wow this is pretty cool!". So you'll say stop and he'll think "nah, I don't HAVE to".
What we did with Jazz was physically take her away and distract her. If she was putting herself in danger we'd take away the danger (powerpoint covers etc) or I'd pull out the big guns and make a big fuss and act very scared (not really an act most of the time...). When I got angry, or firm, she'd ignore me, but when I got emotional or scared it usually scared her. A big gasp and then "OH NO! OUCHIES! OH NO!" with a really worried look on your face. Jazz is pretty sensitive though, and this approach really got her good. Still does, especially the other day when she pulled away from me and almost ran in front of a car at the shopping centre it wasn't anger that stopped her, but my fear and me showing her how scared I was for her made her scared. Not sure if she understood how dangerous it was, but she clung to me the entire shopping trip.
I dont think he's trying to be naughty, but sometimes he seems like he wants to hurt me.
I've tried the playing the emotional card, so far he just doesn't care. Well, not so much he doesn't care, more that he doesn't understand the emotion. Itms?
Must be tired tonight, I'm not making much sense, sorry.
RE your shopping trip, must have given such a fright.
I think at this early stage of toddler-hood they also have little to no impulse control, so while he might understand what 'no' means, he just can't help but touch/do what he isn't supposed to. DD is usually pretty good, but when it comes to my laptop which sits on a table next to the lounge, she can't help but touch the keyboard/screen. she knows not to because she'll look at me and go "uh uh" (which is what we say to her along with no) then turn and touch it. The only thing that works is removing her from it and distracting her with something else. In time he will understand and obey, I think (IMO) he's still a bit young for actual 'discipline' like time outs, although popping him in his cot for a few mins might work. I did it last night with DD because she was throwing a tantrum at 1am (yeah..I have nooo idea what it was over, probably because I was trying to stop her going sideways on the bed so she didn't fall off the edge!) and wouldn't stop. Put her in her cot to scream it out for a few mins, until she would accept me picking her up to calm her down.
At that age, a firm "no" seemed to work for my DD but now that she's a bit older (22mths) I am finding I need to use "consequences" for her instead and that REALLY seems to work!! I give a warning first..... ie "if you do that again, I will have to take away your necklace and you won't see it until tomorrow" (she understands VERY well!!) and she will immediately stop what she was doing and say "nooooo" and grab her necklace tight
if she continues to ignore me, I follow through with what I said (always follow through).
I think every child is different and what works for them last month may not work as well this week...kwim? Good luck. HTH
And don't worry about what other parents are doing with their kids....you know your DS and what works best for him.....if that means giving him a gentle smack on the hand (depending on what it was for) then so be it. If that works, then great. I've had to give my DD a gentle smack on the hand once for doing something very wrong (which I felt so bad about ) but she just laughed at me so i haven't done it since.
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Laughing at discipline...
DS has no idea what discipline is. He understands the word "no" when he wants to, but he just laughs if I tell him off (firm tone, yell - bad I know, smack - also bad I know, although we only do that if he is putting himself in immediate danger ie about to stick his finger in a power point
) nothings working. The more I ask/ tell him to stop something the more he laughs at me. Sometimes I wonder if he knows what he's doing and is just being evil and trying to hurt me. Is that crazy?
it wasn't anger that stopped her, but my fear and me showing her how scared I was for her made her scared. Not sure if she understood how dangerous it was, but she clung to me the entire shopping trip.
RE your shopping trip, must have given such a fright.
) but she just laughed at me
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