In home sleep consultations - experiences??

[jackrose]

I am quickly heading to the end of my sanity with sleep deprivation at the moment. It is having a serious impact on my marriage, ability to deal with my children and - as I mentioned - sanity.

I am sure there are plenty who understand, you know just the usual stuff, up and down all night for months on end.....

I am considering getting some help through a sleep settling consultation on the recommendation of my MCH nurse.

I just wonder if anyone has been down that path and has any recommendations, words of warning/wisdom, experiences they wish to share?

I am looking at Helen Stephens or Kate Mills based on MCH suggestions.

[BrightSparkles]

Subbing for info too.

[Arcadia]

I used a woman who was contracted by a sleep school, but she was independent. She had a great manner and really looked at the whole picture with me, including feeds, awake time and of course sleep. After her visit things improved dramatically and dd started self settling and sleeping in big blocks...still waking for two feeds a night though.

While her techniques were good, it was hard and I found they stopped working when dd was older (read, I was less comfortable with ANY crying the older she got, and by then feeding to sleep worked beautifully).

My woman recommended always being with bub, but trying to soothe them lying down in bed...so I used to rock the bed and sing. It took a bit of experimenting (read crying) to get to that point, and then eventually you do less and less.

It really helped me, but I still feel some guilt that I couldn't work it out without any crying, but that's my issue, and in the end, it all worked out well.

[Tuesday's Child]

I'm interested in this too.

Arcadia, my DD rarely goes down without crying now, unless I feed her to sleep. It's the being left alone to cry that is harmful though. If you're with bub, there will be 'good' hormones in their system to counteract the stress ones.

[jackrose]

Thanks for the feedback.

Arcadia, I hear you on the

still feel some guilt that I couldn't work it out without any crying

It is a real challenge and I have held out on anything but gentle thus far. I just feel I am at a point now where the problems are impacting in a very very detrimental way on the relationships between all of us in the family so I need to look further afield for answers. Not that I am giving up on gentle techniques, I just need some more advice. Still, the guild that I can't do the feed to sleep, all the time in the world, calm mummy, there for you, whatever you need baby - is still there.

i am really hoping that I can find help that is sympathetic with and fits in with my general philosophy of attachment parenting.

I live and hope!

[Arcadia]

We all sound very similar. The in home consultation was excellent for helping me get a plan of attack, but importantly, it also helped bring my dh into the picture a bit more (I insisted he was there for the whole consultation). This meant that if she wasn't settling for me, he knew how to help more while keeping in with our plan. It was a big step for us.

I am worried about how I will go second time around, because I plan to practice attachment parenting, but I know it can get so tiring and difficult, especially when there is only you home all day, and awake all night. I think you have to do whatever feels right. I remember telling my advisor that I don't believe in controlled crying, so I made sure we were onthe same page before she came over.

It's so hard when sleep becomes a battle!