Loosing my VBAC Mojo..

[Jakabella]

I feel so scared today, scared about the pain, and about failing going for my VBAC.

I have a kick-ass Ob and midwife who are so pro VBAC its not funny! DH is very supporting that we get a VBAC, I have SO many wonderful VBAC ladies here that I draw strength from.... so why and I freaking out??

I have accepted that DD's birth was not Ideal, I was nieve, I was induced, she was stuck and we had a c-sect. Its done and dusted. But I would like to avoid it again and have a VBAC. I am reading Silent Knife and I love it....

How do I get my Mojo back??

[KimB]

I'm trying for a vbac as well and I too have my doubts. Unlike you though I have had 4 vb's before my c/s but my mind is still gearing me up incase I need another c/s. I think it is a matter of just thinking positive and keeping in mind what you want to achieve out of this birth. I'll be fighting to get what I want but the doubts are still there. Just be flexible and accept any changes that may happen and it is ok to worry

[~Minny~]

Not sure hun, but as the time got closer i to had these thoughts! Once in labour though it all went out the window and all that mattered was trying my very hardest for that Vbac.

As for the disapointment by not achieving it....i wont lie it hurt.....but i would rather have tried then have not tried at all if that makes sense.

You CAN do this! xox

[Enchanted]

Do you think a cheer squad is in order?
Might help lift your spirits a little and give you back that "can do" attitude!

[Arimeh]

I can't tell you how to get your mojo back mate, I never lost mine the second attempt of it because I'm so darn stubborn!

However, if you debrief on your first birth, find what went wrong etc, I think you'll discover that the problem didn't lie within you to not birth vaginally - but was the circumstances. Yes, inducing does quite often lead to c-sections. Cascade of intervention and all that. There is a reason why its so published - because it happens soooo often, and its true!

So it doesn't mean that the same will happen this time. For one, you won't be induced. You'll go into spontaneous labour. This baby is not Bella, this is a different baby, different pregnancy, different birth. As for the pain, well if we have time, I'll get one of the girls to send "Childbirth without Fear" to you - not sure who has it now in our BB group. It goes into why we suffer pain in labour, and if you are aware of the whys, you will be able to deal with it. I wish I had read it last time, but I have that knowledge now and I am going to use it.

Lean on us as much as you have to, birthing vaginally is scary because you don't know whats going to happen - its completely out of your control. But that doesn't mean that its going to be a bad thing - just an... unexplored adventure

I'm not going to talk you into having a VBAC, you have to want that for yourself, but I'm behind you all the way no matter which way you go. I know I was tempted by another c-section before my VBA2C, and the only thing that stopped me was that my midwives didn't do them!! LOL... fear has a way of getting to us and we either have the choice to run with it - or run away from it.

[Shanti]

Although i have not been in your situation (havent had a cs) i can tell you that the pain of labour and the birth is so bloody worth it!!! You CAN do this. BELIEVE in yourself.

Concentrate on how damn pleased you will feel once you achieve that vbac and how empowered you will feel! Like you can do anything!!

[Jakabella]

Thanks so much ladies! I feel better already.

I know its just because im getting to the pointy end of the pregnancy and that I am thinking about the end and how Im going to get there.

I know that I CAN DO IT and I have faith in my body this time as its already responding differently than with Bella, and I think its a good sign that maybe my body has woken up or is going to behave differently this time - and why wouldnt it! Its a different preg as you say.

My OB has vowed that he will NOT be giving me a C-sect - he said that I should never have been induced last time that it wasnt warrented - and even that makes me feel good! I have support all around me - even if things dont go to plan.

I guess its just dawning on me that this baby IS coming soon!

As for the pain - I know what it feels like and I had a posterior labour - my OB told me that if this bub is not posterior that it will not hurt as much - it WILL hurt but a posterior labour is hell! Even that makes me feel like I can deal with it.

I am about to start writing my birth plan - and I am going to include some "out side the box" things that I would like to try, dancing to my ipod, water (never was offered that with Bella) and some other things that I think may help me.

Thanks again ladies - I think my freak out maybe over for the day!!

Much Love to all xox

[ladybird11]

Hun, do you have access to any birthing DVD's like 'the business of being born' to re-instill your VBAC mojo?

I'm cheering for you gorgeous!!!!

[Jakabella]

Leesa - I dont but I can get DH to download me some - infact I may go and have a look today and start it dl'ing! Thanks for the suggestion!

[Arimeh]

Yup agree with Leesa - BOBB is good, as is orgasmic birth. I think we've also watched something called birthing by numbers or something about that? its all about statistics and stuff

[Shanti]

Yep ice and water for labour was all i kept asking for!! Sucking on ice helps u focus on something kwim?

And yep if our babies this time around are actually facing correct way and not OP then it should be way less painful!!

[ladybird11]

Yup - Orgasmic birth is another I've watched this week.

If anything - those two DVD's alone really instilled in my head the how the cycle of intervention can lead to many unecessary further interventions. And once something is stuck in my head my 'logical' brain kicks in (hopefully this occurs at the time I'm trying to push a watermelon thru something the size of a lemon :lol). The births were so inspiring (in orgasmic birth especially) and I was watching thinking 'I want that!'....

You've got a pro OB and midi too - that is soooo in your favour! They'll re-affirm that you can do it hun!! As will your cyber BB cheer squad!

[Arimeh]

And remember - the biggest thing for a successful VBAC is having people behind you supporting you and believing in you. Because its them that you will call on if you lose the faith yourself. I wouldn't have been able to do it without my midwife and DH believing in me, I know that for sure.

[*suz1*]

Watch some VBAC vids on youtube? I listened a lot to Hypnosis for Birth (I and II) - A Labour of Love by Gabrielle Targett on my ipod, especially the affirmations. You sound like you're back on track. Writing my Birth Plan was a turning point for me, once I felt like I'd covered all bases it took away lot of the fear and uncertainty.
Cheering for you here too!

[1MOREPLZ]

i don't really have an answer for you hun BUT i can say this.....
i'm not even pregnant and desperatly want a VBA3C and i have moments where i am all for it then i have times where i think to myself....it's not going to happen just go with another cesearean right now i am with the later....as we are going through IVF
Arimeh knows what i am on about :P shes been my ears once already with great thanks

[Arimeh]

Arimeh knows what i am on about :P shes been my ears once already with great thanks

Everyone needs support people, and if I can help - I'm always here for my VBAC girls!!

[1MOREPLZ]

thanks hunni

it's hard in my mind...as i don't really have any IRL friends that would be supportive to me...my DH is my BF and our other good friends live in kalgoorlie don't think my mum would be any good to me either... i need a good friend or find a doula who is willing to help support me

[Arimeh]

Honey I would fly to Sydney to support you if you couldn't find anyone else!!!! Not that I'm a doula or anything (might be one day though)