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thread: Opening something for your child/ren to eat whilst shopping?

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Jun 2007
    ...not far enough away :)
    1,413

    Question Opening something for your child/ren to eat whilst shopping?

    So, don't know if this is the right spot but just had a discussion/disagreement with my DH over this subject he heard being discussed on the radio today.

    The question was, "what do you think of opening up something for your child to eat whilst out food shopping"?

    Do you care, don't you care etc & so on.


    I said "whatever, I don't care", "you are going to pay for it anyway, it is a food shop" FWIW I always take snacks but have been caught short & opened something on occasion. Also for a while DS1 would request a small milk drink, we would put in the trolley but not let him open til we paid. Anyway, as a Mum I am not at all fussed....

    But..

    Some guy rang in & said it's totally wrong, you need to teach your child self control. Just because they want it they can't have it. (this is where we disagreed)

    What does everyone else think?? Just interested in general opinion.

  2. #2

    Personally, no I don't. Well when I used to go to a supermarket to shop that is But have no issues with families that do.

    If my kids wanted something, be it a drink or something else. I would say that they could have it but could not eat/drink it until it was paid for. To me it just feels wrong.

  3. #3
    2013 BellyBelly RAK Recipient.

    Apr 2006
    Winter is coming
    5,000

    I do it. I see the point of not opening it until it is paid for, but I just can't be bothered trying to finish the shopping with a tantruming bored toddler when a biscuit will solve my problem. I don't let them eat fruit or stuff from the deli unless it is pre-priced though.

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Jul 2007
    melb
    8,498

    I tend not to spend long in food shops with kids and tend to give then something to hold onto eg a squeeze yougurt or ginger bread man. Have never let them open until payed for.

    I don't tend to have kids eat in shops as dont want them making a mess (actual butchers not in supermarket does give kids a mini frankfurt).

  5. #5
    Registered User

    Feb 2008
    Country Victoria
    5,945

    Yeah, im an opener. Usually its just drinks for both DD and I and it keeps her happy for the trip, which in turn, keeps me happy. Food isnt usually opened as I take my own shopping. I take my own drinks too, but its usually gone by the time i get there (30 min drive away.. and im pregnant..lol) Im also guilty of using it as a bribe to her.. as her milk drink etc is nearly the last isle

  6. #6
    Registered User

    Jun 2007
    Dandenong Ranges, Melbourne.
    5,673

    I do it. Every time I go shopping. I have minimum family support, my dh works long hours and my kids aren't in cc so I have to take them both with me to do our big weekly grocery shop. I will usually open a pack of rice crackers for them or if we are buying a big box of small chip packets I will let them have one each while we go around.

  7. #7
    Registered User

    Jan 2006
    8,369

    No, I do not open food we haven't paid for. But, having said that, I will go to the till and buy one apple and let DS eat that while we're shopping. If we're at the end of the shopping he just has to wait. I also take toys, drinks, food etc if needed - ideally we go shopping just after he's eaten.

    I was told off by my mother (a big one on denying her children anything they wanted) because she wanted to open food and give it to Liebling, even though he wasn't asking for it! I said no way, you don't do that and she told me off then was in a huff for about an hour. I do think it is important to teach a child that waiting for something and paying for what they want are virtues in society and things he should do.

    I worked in a corner shop (no, not a large supermarket, a small corner shop) and trying to scan an item a child has already opened and eaten is a nightmare. Just pay for the sweet straight away, you're never more than ten seconds away from a cashier!

  8. #8
    Registered User

    Dec 2006
    In my own private paradise
    15,272

    i do it if we've been out and about and shopping is the last thing we do. but always something that doesn't need to be weighed, and i always make sure i have cash on me to pay for it in case EFT machines are down. if she asks for fruit, i'll go to the express check out and pay straight away. and usually with a drink i'll do the same thing.

    DD knows that food needs to be paid for - but i also realise she's only a child, and it's not fair to expect her to spend all day out and about, and get to the shops when she is tired and really just wants to go home and have something to eat, so we will get her something

    having said that, i've just thought about it - and it's probably a good six months since we've needed to do it - we moved into town, so we don't mind so much if shopping gets put off by a day cos it's only a couple of kms rather than 40 - so if she is struggling, we come straight home...

  9. #9
    Registered User

    Sep 2005
    In the middle of nowhere
    9,362

    Depends how frazzled I am, and how little patience I have. But yes I have and I don't see a problem with it. However, if I do open something it's too keep the kids amused rather than the fact that they've asked for something.
    THe definition of stealing at law must include the intent to permanently deprive - so to use something without any intent to pay for something. It's not stealing if you have intent to pay for it. I have more issue with people 'testing' the grapes and other produce by sampling them by the bunch

  10. #10
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Feb 2006
    South Eastern Suburbs, Vic
    6,054

    I do the shopping either online or with company, so generally no...but in a pinch I think I would - I remember my mum used to do it all the time.

    I can't see the supermarkets really minding, given that you're probably buying an extra thing that you wouldn't normally buy, in order to lengthen your shopping time and keep your child more content for other shoppers. You're not going to spend as much if your child is screaming or fighting and you're racing round the aisles. I'd be interested to ask what they think. I'm all for teaching self control and discipline and manners, but if I was taking the kids shopping after kinder or in late afternoon when they're already exhausted and you've forgotten to prepare (or have no snacks, hence the shopping!), then fair's fair. You know your child's limits, as well as your own.

  11. #11
    Registered User
    Add NaeNae on Facebook

    Sep 2007
    South Gippsland
    3,753

    I take a snack for DD when we go to the supermarket JIC.

    It may sound harsh, but I consider the act of opening or consuming a product that is still technically the "shops property" stealing. You have not yet paid for the item even if you have the intention of paying for it, its theft as it still belongs to the store.

  12. #12
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Jul 2008
    Eastern Surburbs, Melbourne
    1,841

    I never allowed my girls to have anything to eat until we got to the car to go home. Even then they usually had to wait til we got home and the shopping was inside.
    When I have the grandchildren with me and they want something they are told it has to go into the basket to be paid for before they are allowed to have it. 9 times out of 10 they have said OK and I hear no more, sometimes I have to remind them that we have to pay for it first.

  13. #13
    Moderator

    Oct 2004
    In my Zombie proof fortress.
    6,449

    Depends with us. Not so often now the girls are getting older, DD1 can definitely understand waiting and DD2 is getting there. I often do give DD2 a bean or a snow pea to munch on. When DD1 was little we had to put the capsicums out of her reach, as she would eat them like apples whilst we were shopping.

    Have found most checkout operators understanding about half eaten apples etc, many don't bother charging for them. I did have one operator who looked disgusted at having to scan a half open packet of chips (it was the big Christmas shop), but in general I found he was quite cranky about the kid's behaviour so I stopped going through his check out.

  14. #14
    Registered User
    Add STARRYSKY on Facebook Follow STARRYSKY On Twitter

    Aug 2007
    adelaide
    1,989

    I was one of those people who before having kids always sad, no way.

    Now, I go straight to the youghurt squeezies and DS gets one while I run around grabbing stuff, but thats it, only a squeezie, only one too.
    He has on occasion grabbed a mushroom and started chomping it, the checkout peoples are always that surprised that he eats mushrooms they never charge me for it, but I always offer to pay

  15. #15
    2014 BellyBelly RAK Recipient.

    Dec 2008
    Melbourne, VIC
    4,637

    I do it, as I know I'm going to pay for it

    And I do it for myself a well. No one batted an eyelid yet

  16. #16
    Registered User

    Nov 2009
    Scottish expat living in Geelong
    5,572

    I don't do it. I think it is good to teach a child restraint in small doses so a toddler I would say no until we are out of the supermarket, and now my kids are older they have to wait until we are home and the shopping is unpacked. The only exception is on a really hot day, I will get a bottle of water at the counter and let them have some whilst we are waiting to be served.

  17. #17
    Registered User

    Jun 2007
    Where Chaos is fun and plentiful!!!!
    1,883

    We do sometimes and we dont other times. We have the concept of "We have to pay the lady" and i usually try and drum that in that we cant open things until we pay the lady, so DS has taken to grabbing an apple recently and just starts munching on it before we can even tell him no.. we have offered to pay for them (or get them to weigh an un eaten apple twice) but both times we were told no its ok! (ne of the check out ladies was just so impressed his special treat for the shopping trip was an apple that she said, "just have it!!!!!"

    But I am trying to actually make an effort to stop him. Last time we went shopping he grabbed some chewy lifesaver things and just right away started to open them, DH took them off him and said no, not until we pay the lady and popped them in his pocket, and we darn near nearly stole them because Dh forgot about them til we were at the counter and DS asked where his lollies were for the lady!!! Also I am waiting for the day he goes to open something that i cant afford to pay for!! So I am trying to teach him that its not ok!!!

    I find it really hard shopping with DS and DD.. often i will buy DS an icecream or something and pop him in the trolley bit of the trolley if i am just doing a little shop- otherwise if he is loose and i have DD in the trolley I seem to be forever abandoning her in the middle of the supermarket to chase after DS!!! Even when both DH and I take them both its a fun time trying to keep up with him!! So I am completely understanding of any parent who uses it as bribery!!!!! Its just that sometimes it backfires!!!

  18. #18
    Registered User

    Apr 2008
    Melbourne
    6,745

    It depends really - often I buy something from the bakery before I go in for them to eat but that is usually because I need change for the trolley

    These days I tell them to pick something and they can carry it around until we get to the checkout and then they can have it once we have paid- but then it also depends on their mood and if there is a tantrum brewing.

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