Reply With Quoteummmmm good luck? im having the same issues but we have jamies attached to him because i got sick of him losing it all the time and now im regretting it he goes without it at day care dont know how to make him not have it
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Getting Rid of the Dummy - Advice Please
DS used to only use his Dummy at sleep times and at times of great distress (eg falling over and actually hurting himself)
Of late - the last month or so, he is increasingly reliant on it, and DH and I are guilty of not monitoring it or removing it so its just gotten a bit out of control. DS would use it all day long if we let him. He used to take it out when he got out of bed and put it on his little bedside table and forget about it, but now he goes in to get it and keeps it. At first it just seemed to be when we figured his 2yo molars were coming through so we let it go, but its manifested into a constant thing and I am worried it will delay his speech. He is much more reserved and introverted when he has his dummy, but talks up a storm and sings, plays etc much more outgoing without it.
I think it's time to get rid of it all together, but I am not quite sure how to go about it - I am thinking cold turkey and just dealing with the fall out which will hopefully pass quickly, but that seems a bit harsh.
Idea's and successes anyone has had with this would be greatly appreciated
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ummmmm good luck? im having the same issues but we have jamies attached to him because i got sick of him losing it all the time and now im regretting it he goes without it at day care dont know how to make him not have it
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Cold turkey. That's how we did it. Admittedly she was a lot younger... But we just had to do it.
She cried a lot, but we sucked it up.
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im scared to go cold turkey i think i would get hurt lol sorry nay hijacking is not nice
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Actually J - Bailz doesn't really use it at care either, too busy, only for sleep. I think he can be easily distracted with all the kids around and gives it up easier and forgets about it.
OP - How long did it take before your DD forgot about it?
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We decided it was time to nix the dummy when DS1 was almost 3. He only used it for sleep, but he "had' to have one in his mouth and one in his hand when he was going to sleep. The crunch came when he started waking at night because he'd lost the one in his hand
Anyhoo ... we were going on holiday for 10 days so I seized my opportunity. On the drive to our holiday place I told DS1 I'd accidentally left his dummies at home. I made a big deal of "OH NO, I'm so sorry!!!". That gave me a few hours before bed time for him to get used to the idea he wouldn't have them for a few nights.
The first night he went to bed ok, he seemed to understand he wouldn't be getting his dummy(ies). And that first night he woke a couple of times and sobbed for his dummies. All we could do was comfort him and help him get back to sleep. We certainly didn't have a terrific night's sleep as he was pretty restless, but then again he was sleeping somewhere strange too.
After that he would say (on holiday) "no dummies mum, you left them at home". And he didn't wake up again looking for them. When we got home he was totally fine with not having his dummy.
Good luck - the "thinking" about how to do it, is probably worse than actually doing it.
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A few of our friends got rid of their kids dummies at Easter when Easter bunny took them. They were around 2.5. We did the same with L and his bottles at the same time. Maybe you can spend a week or so telling B that the fairies are taking his dummies or another baby needs them and offer a replacement car, Teddy or something he will enjoy. L still talks about the chocolate bunny he got for his bottles. From what iv heard from our friends who used this method the first night or two were tough but after that things settled down. You can post B's dummies to W if you like lol.
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I've not had to handle this one directly so apologies for the second-hand advice, but watched 2 friends do the dummy detox thing with kids similar ages to Bailz.
First parceled them all up in a beautiful shiny bag and said that now her DD was a big girl, it was time for the dummy fairy to come and take them to all the babies that needed them. They hung the bag on a tree outside and after nap time went out to find that there was sparkles sprinkled everywhere (fairy evidence!) and that the dummies had been replaced by a special present. Maybe a bit girly but you could always adjust to suit whatever sparks Bailey's imagination.
The second friend cut a slit out of the teat of all the dummies in the house. Her dS still had access to them but quickly tired of the 'broken' dummies as they didn't work the same and was ok to just chuck them in the bin.
I think I read on here about someone who took them to the toy store and helped her child 'exchange' the dummies for a new toy.
Obviously none of these things stop the LO missing them, but I can see how it would help them make sense of the dummies just going away.
Good luck Hun. (and J!)
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Just subbing in cos we want ro do the same thing with Mima. She just has them at nights mostly but we also have times when she has been more upset and had them more like when we travelled. I swear she has them stashed around the house tho, cos she sometimes just appears with one and then it is tantrums if she can't keep it.
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Took about a week. And she was too young to really have the cognitive understanding... So it could take longer for B.
Maybe trying the dummy fairy idea or something similar might be a better idea!
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Yep same Bella - we have lost endless Dummies and I am sure they are all hidden somewhere as Bailz appears with ones I haven't seen for a while every now and then, it will be interesting when I get rid of them if he does have a stash LOL
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we are lucky coz we moved we have no stash and jamie is down to his last one which does have a hole in it so it might be time to say bye bye to the dummy and one advantage is that jazzy doesnt have any for him to steal either
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we went cold turkey with DS when we was about 8-10 months. Took about 2 days for him to get over it. He occasionally sucks his thumb now, but not often.
I like the idea of getting some compliance with a toy shop and doing the "exchange" ...
One girlfriend of mine lives in Detroit, and there's a "binkie tree" and when kids have to give up their dummy, they go and put it in the binkie tree, like a rite of passage
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just subbing
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We went cold turkey too and in exchange for DD dummies (she has 5 or 6 of them!) she got a present - a doll from memory. She kept asking for approx. 1 week but we stuck to our guns and there ahs been no issue
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We gave DS plenty of warning that the day after his second birthday we would put all of the dummys in the bin. He understood that things don't come out of the bin. I reminded him every couple of days or so until the big day. Then on the day after his birthday we packed them all up together and he put them in the bin. He asked for it the next day but we just reminded him they were in the bin. He was really good with it. I do think that for an item like that which provides them with so much comfort it is good to prepare them for the change.
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Like Krysalyss, we chose the day after Kyson's 2nd birthday as well (ON his actual birthday seemed a bit mean, hehe). Kyson was only using it at night time and nap time, so a week or so before his birthday when he was going to bed, I would tell him that soon he was going to turn two and be a big boy. And when he is two and a big boy he won't need his dummy any more. Then closer to his birthday I would tell him how many more days (not sure if he really understood though), and then on his birthday I told him that he was a big boy now so he could have his dummy one more time and then he wouldn't need it anymore. The next day I put the dummy away without him seeing. He didn't have a nap that day so he was really tired come bedtime, and when I put him to bed he didn't even look for the dummy. He just cuddled up with me and fell asleep. He's never looked for it since! I expected drama and was so surprised at how smooth it went.
I've also heard of ideas like Santosha mentioned where the "dummy fairy" comes to collect all the dummies. Maybe tell him about it for a week or so, and connect the final day with something that he remembers. Maybe a Saturday when you can tell him something like "On Saturday when Mummy and Daddy are both home with you" so he can sort of know when it is coming.
I think the biggest thing that helped for Kyson was that I didn't mention it at all on the first night I put him to bed without it. Rather than tell him that he was going to go to bed without his dummy, I just said nothing about it and put him to bed with the normal routine minus the dummy. I think if I had mentioned it he would have wanted it.
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