Ok Im not sure what to do, im starting to have sleepless nights and I dont like it!! I need help!!
I have been putting DD to bed in her bassinet next to our bed every night since she was born (with the exception of the early days where we were co-sleeping quite a bit).
I normally wrap her up and tuck her in with a blanket and rock the bassinet to help her get to sleep, everything has been going fine with that up until she discovered her hands a week ago and has decided she loves sucking on them. Now it is a struggle to wrap her up, shes fighting to get her hands out, it doesnt matter how tight i do it she just grunts, groans and whinges until i give in and unwrap them. The problem with that is then she cant sleep cos her hands are waving around or shes too busy sucking on them.. she will start drifting off with them on her chest and will startle when she relaxes and they start falling down beside her. This goes on until she starts grizzling cos she really just wants to go to sleep!
Last night i managed to wrap her and she went to sleep fairly easy only to wake up a few hrs later trying to get her hands out, i fed her and tried to wrap her back up and put her to bed. Well there was no way that was going to happen! So i left her arms out, well for the next couple hrs i listened to her sucking and grizzling until she started crying for another feed. I fed her and just couldnt be bothered going thru it all again so i let her sleep on me. Which meant i didnt sleep very well cos i was worried about smothering her (im paranoid cos i have heard too many bad stories lately!).
I am very very tempted to start sleeping her on her tummy cos she sleeps so well like that during the day (im always checking on her every 10 mins!) but i am just too scared to do it during the night! It is drummed into everyones heads so much these days about how it contributes to sids etc that i am just too worried that if i do it something will happen to her, and i will never forgive myself.
What do i do!!!! Would u/do u/did u.. sleep ur baby on its tummy during the night?? I probably wldnt even get any more sleep then i am now cos i wld be constantly checking on her!
I dont know.... im starting to dread night times and her waking up for feeds cos i just know its going to be such a struggle, it sux cos she was so good at night, she never cried.. and she was starting to sleep in 4-7 hr blocks! It feels like ive messed her up cos i have always wrapped her or held her, ive never let her just sleep on her back with her arms by her side or up next to her head or anything.
I am just about to go and wake her up cos dh thought he wld do me a favour and put her to bed tonight, but the silly bugger put her to sleep on her tummy in her cot in her own room! I cant leave her there!!!
Maybe you can try something like a wombie. It's a sleep suit that you zip them into and they still have access to their hands but are wrapped at the same time. Ok that explanation makes no sense lol, just google it.
Or you can try doing the angel wrap. Same concept, you wrap them with their arms up. My boys preferred that to the traditional wrapping style.
I can't see how old your DD is as I'm on my phone but my DD started getting out of her wrap around 8-9 weeks so we bit the bullet and put her in a GroBag at 10 weeks and she was fine! She was already sleeping through (amazing, I know!) and she continued doing just that. I was sure her startle reflex would keep her awake but nope, first night she slept 12 hours straight
If you're not keen on sleeping bags yet, have a look at the Love Me Baby swaddled, they're great. Arms are in the bag/swaddle but they can still gnaw on them through the bag
My DD has always been a tummy sleeper. I fought with her for 6 weeks about it, everyone told me it was bad but its what she prefered. I just made sure to have the monitor up really loud so i could hear her breathing and i have never had any problems. If you are really worried you could change her from her belly to her back before you go to bed.
At about the same age we started using a swaddle type bag too, her arms were inside it (no arm holes) so it helped calm the startle reflex but still allowed her to move her arms around. The first few nights she woke more but like anything, it takes time to adjust and then she was fine. These kind of sleep bags are only for back sleeping though, as I'm sure you're aware.
You might be confusing her grunting and straining for trying to get her arms free, but really it's grunting baby syndrome, where a newborn grunts and strains when they are trying to fart or poo, they are so uncoordinated. My 3 week old grunts and strains all night.
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My dd was doing the exact same thing it was driving me nuts!! I started wrapping her looser, so she doesn't startle herself awake, but can chew/suck her hands through the wrap. Just sucks its so cold and the wrap gets a bit wet, but I just turn the heater up lol, not looking forward to the electricity bill!! I am about to buy her a wrap, can't remember what it's called but seems to be the same concept as what I'm doing but I think she will be zipped in...
Last edited by ellasmummy; July 11th, 2011 at 10:51 AM.
: on phone autocorrect fail!
We never let my son sleep on his tummy until he was rolling and would roll himself onto his tummy.
Totally different story with my daughter though. She was so much happier on her tummy that we started letting her sleep on her tummy for day naps. I would still put her on her back for night sleeps, but then we realised how much better she was sleeping during her naps on her tummy, and decided to let her sleep on her tummy at night too. Her cot is 'side car-ed' to my side of the bed, so she's within arm reach at night. Like your DD, my daughter found her hands early and loves to suck the back of her hand while she nods off. She even has a permanent little hickie on her hand, lol. When she's on her tummy she loves to suck her hand to sleep, and she doesn't startle once she's asleep because her arms are against the bed.
We had her in a woombie or an ergoCocoon until she was about 6 weeks, and that's when she changed into a sleeping bag and started sleeping on her tummy.
She's now old enough that she can roll and tummy sleeping is meant to be "safe" now, but like you, I was nervous about tummy sleeping while she was little. But she was so happy on her tummy that we just let her do it with the baby monitor (and breathing alarm) turned on.
When my sister and I were born the recommendation was to sleep babies on their tummy, then when my first brother was born the recommendation was to sleep babies on their side, then less than a year later when my twin brothers were born (yep, mum had 3 babies under a year of age, lol!) the recommendation had been changed again to back sleeping. Not that I would recommend sleeping your bub on her tummy, just saying that it's your decision and I would never judge you because I did it myself
I am having the same problem with my DD except she is 1. If I don't rap her she stays awake, fidgeting and playing with her hands. As soon as I wrap her she asleep, but when she wakes again during the night she spend her time trying to get oout of the wrap. Will look into the wombie thing. Good suggestion!
Beautitude- Thanks! I looked at the woombie and i think its much the same as the wrap me up that some of the other girls suggested. Im thinking of getting one but now im confused what size to get! My girl is 5.3kgs, shld i just get the medium sized one do u think from 6.5kgs to 9kgs? Will it matter if its a little big on her?? And also do they really stretch enough so that the baby can get their hands to their mouth? None of the pictures on the website have the babies with their hands up near their face! I just realised that u never said that u have actually used one! Have u?? If u havent dont worry bout trying to answer my questions!
Taurean- My dd is 11 weeks so yeah roughly the same age that ur dd started getting out of her wrap. I checked out the love me baby swaddle, and they look great except im not even sure she wld like sleeping with her arms up by her head since we have only been wrapping her with them down by her side.. it might not be the 'natural position' for her anymore! I dont know!! Altho i just had another look at the website and u might be able to swaddle the baby with their hands by their side still and it just gives them the room to move their arms up by their head if they choose too...and gnaw at their hands!
LMS- I wldnt feel so nervous sleeping her on her tummy during the night if i cld hear her breathing but i cant! Even wen i have my ear right near her head! Thinking of maybe getting a sound and movement monitor, that wld ease my mind a bit. I think if i tried flipping her over from her tummy to her back she wld wake up way too much.. plus shes not used to being 'free' cos i always swaddle her when shes on her back. Thankyou, its good to know other ppl go against 'the rules' and sleep their babies on their tummies too without any dramas
Human bean- Ok so it must be normal for a baby to start wanting to move around more at this age?? Im thinking an actual swaddle (not just a wrap) shld do the trick then. Ive had 3 sleepless nights in a row now so i cld handle a few more whilst shes adjusting to her new swaddle i think, thanks! Oh once the baby starts rolling they cant roll over in the swaddle can they?? That wld be awful!
Kuraiza- Yeah i definitely think its grunting from pooing or farting to start with a lot of the time.. but once she has finished doing that she is so awake that she fights and struggles to get the wrap off her, she normally succeeds but then cant get back to sleep cos shes too busy playing with her hands which makes her start grizzling cos shes tired or she decides shes hungry even if i just fed her an hour before. I reckon if she cld only poo/fart without waking up a lot of my problem wld be solved! I cant wait til she can!
Ellasmummy- ok u must be a way better wrapper then me! If i try and wrap her loosely she can get her hands straight out! I already leave her wrapped really loosely from the legs down cos i like her being able to kick if she has wind or something. I reckon one of these wrap me ups or woombie is the go! (especially for ppl like me that cant wrap real well!)
Mylitta- Ok so now ur just making me think that maybe i shld just bite the bullet and sleep dd on her tummy for her night sleep as well. I started looking into a sound and movement monitor today but just wondering if it works even if baby is on its tummy or are they designed just for back sleepers? Sorry im not sure how they work! Ideally that wld be great if it wld work cos she definitely sleeps a lot better and longer on her tum tum.... mummy doesnt wen she is tho!! It also makes more sense if i eventually have to start patting her to sleep in her cot (atm im rocking the bassinet) it wld feel a lot better patting her back and not her chest!
And yeah i cant believe how often they have changed 'the rules'. My mum and i were just talking about that today.. i didnt realise that at one stage it was recommended to sleep babies on there sides though! My mum was saying that i shld just start sleeping her on her tummy permanently cos she did that with me and my sisters and nothing happened, except they know so much more then 30 yrs ago, i feel stupid to go against all the research they have done and do it!! Any info on the breathing alarm you have wld be muchly appreciated!! Thanks!
Delphmoon- Great that u have gotten to 1 before you have had this drama! Obviously its not something that is just going to go away with my dd then. Some babies are just too fascinated by their hands! Yeah check out the woombie!
Thanks again girls for all ur suggestions.
Last night was another shocker! Dd woke up at 1.30am, i fed her, wrapped her back up, she spent the next half hour awake and trying to unwrap herself and get to her hands, so i took her out of bassinet, fed her again to try and settle her, ended up letting her go to sleep on me whilst i was still sitting up, i stayed like this til 3.30, drifting in and out of sleep, i then put her next to me on her tummy and proceeded to keep checking on her every few mins until 6am when dh got up to go to work! So ridiculous! Need to do something to fix the problem now!!
Ive got 3 options.. 1- a woombie or wrap me up. 2- buy a breathing monitor so dd can sleep on her tummy without me worrying. 3- just let her get used to having her hands out and stop wrapping her completely. Im not sure if no. 3 will work though.
Thinking i might try the swaddle first since its a lot cheaper then buying the monitor. What do u guys think??
Gosh before i had DD i never wld have thought this kind of problem wld arise! Theres just so many little 'problems' u can come across with them! In a couple of months i reckon ill be doing a thread on what to do when my baby is too big for her bassinet but she needs to be rocked to go to sleep and i cant do that with her cot! Im dreading it already! (also not wanting to make any changes now though so the problem doesnt arise in the future haha)
How odd. I'm getting some decent blocks of sleep at last and now you're the bleary eyed tired mummy. I definitely feel your pain! We had the swaddle fighting issue almost immediately after bringing DS home. I ended up abandoning the wrap as I was spending half tge night wrapping and re wrapping DS. Turns out my little buddy likes to sleep on his side. I have an anti-roll device, basically a piece of fabric with a triangular wedge pillow on each end. I love it because he's in a comfy spot, and I know he can't roll onto his tum and get stuck. I highly reccomend trying one out. I got it at big W.
Could you sleep with her in your sling? Not ideal but I mastered that little trick in more desperate times. Let me know how you go!
Just a quick one but I bought DD a proper swaddle (Kiddopotomous brand) when she started getting out of her wrap swaddles and she still escaped it! Velcro and all! I'd be inclined to buy a sleeping bag and see how she goes arms free, she may surprise you. Living Textiles have gorgeous bags much cheaper than Grobags, as do Dream Bags. You need to order them online though so allow a few days or so for delivery.
And yes, swaddling is out once they learn to roll. DD rolled at 4 months so I was glad she was already in sleeping bags, especially when I found her sound asleep on her tummy the very next morning after her first roll It freaked me out, even though we have a breathing monitor!
That's my suggestion but keep us posted with what you do!
Yes! Sleeping bags have been great for us too. He used to wake being tucked in so the bag really solved that problem. It also eliminated any startling awake when he's put into his bassinette as the sheets were much colder than my cuddles lol. With his hoodie gro-bag he doesn't notice he's been put down.
You'd be amazed how sensitive the breathing monitors are. We had to turn the sensitivity of ours down because when the central heating came on it the monitor was sensitive enough to think that it was a baby breathing! You have to play with it a bit to get the sensitivity right, but you know it's working when you pick up bub from the cot and then the alarm goes off One of the brands even has an alarm for when the baby's breathing starts to slow, rather than waiting until the breathing stops. Not sure what brand it is though, and I've always been happy with my angelcare one
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Tummy sleeping????
Thankyou!
It freaked me out, even though we have a breathing monitor!
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