Mummy, how do fish get from swimming to being eaten by me?

[Olive]

this was a question my 4.5yr old asked tonight whilst eating fish and chips.
How do i reply? i certainly dont wamy to use the word kill, so how else can i explain??

[Rouge]

We explained it as they are grown on a farm/caught etc and when they die (don't say how) they sell them to the supermarkets to eat.

I have since explained to both DS 5 and DD9 though.

They actually taught DD9 at Kinder on an excursion.

[nothing2lose]

Because they are such kind little fishies they volunteer themselves to jump into batter then the hot oil just so you (DD) can have yummy fish and chips???

Nah....maybe not!

How about (and it is a little lie) there are so many fish in the ocean, to make sure there is room enough for them, fisherpeople go out and boats and bring them back and give them to the fish and chip shop....???

[~me~]

I would explain it as clear as you can, as in the food chain. I always tell my kids where their food comes from, it's up to them if to eat or not too.
It's a bit like the nursery rhyme..there was an old woman who swallowed a fly
Have you ever taken DD fishing? That would be a good start
So many cultures have to live off the land to survive, that is another to way to explain it.

[PumpkinZulu]

A fisherman goes out to sea in a big boat, catches all the fish and bring them back to shore to be all cooked up? Dunno, but it's a great (albeit kind of difficult) question on your DD's part

[Aligater]

My 3.5 year old knows as DH goes fishing and brings them home in a bucket sometime still swiming. She has watched him kill and filet fish and is more likely to eat 'daddy caught' ones than shop ones

[Olive]

aarrhhhhh this is so hard i think if i told her they were killed shed freak abit, and with inlaws dog being put down last week (she understands animals dying) i hope when i say they die she doesnt confuse pets dying and other animals being killed for us to eat.
oh and i have to give her an answer tomorrow as i told her id find the answer for her tonight... (she asked me if id find the answer on the computer )

[nothing2lose]

I've just thought of the perfect answer...............!!!


"Ask your father!"

[Olive]

[Epacris]

Olive, my DS1’s favourite food is crispy fish skin. When he was about 3 he said to the goldfish “I want to eat you and eat your skin”. Then when it died (when he was about 3 ½) he said “Can we eat him now?”. Sorry, that probably hasn’t helped you at all, but I just wanted you to know that my DS1 was certainly aware of the concept of killing, death and eating at an early age.

[nothing2lose]

Olive, my DS1’s favourite food is crispy fish skin. When he was about 3 he said to the goldfish “I want to eat you and eat your skin”. Then when it died (when he was about 3 ½) he said “Can we eat him now?”. Sorry, that probably hasn’t helped you at all, but I just wanted you to know that DS1 was certainly aware of the concept of killing, death and eating at an early age.

What sort of monster are you breeding??

PS You might want to hide your cat

ETA: I am pretty sure Hannibal Lector used that same line on his dates...."I want to eat you and eat your skin"

[Epacris]

I know, I know, it was chilling, he said it all Hannibal Lecter* like too.

*Please note: I do not let my children watch movies such a Silence of the Lambs.

ETA: SNAP N2L

[Olive]

Rach!!

[nothing2lose]

*Please note: I do not let my children watch movies such a Silence of the Lambs.

ETA: SNAP N2L

By snap I assume you don't mean the snapping of my spinal cord after holding me captive in a fishtank or similar for weeks on end feeding me fish food so I develop oh-so-crispy-when-deep-fried scales?????

[Epacris]

Hmmmm.... a soy and sweet chilli glaze (DS1’s favourite) for you I think N2L.

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

My son thought it hilarious at age 2ish to say that the chickens didn't know - they didn't know they were for dinner, yum yum!

We live near a farm and have a good butcher locally, so I've always been upfront that the animals are killed and we eat them. Predators eat prey. We talk about what sort of animals eat others. He's getting a bit squeamish now, but I remind him that he ate lamb for dinner and thought it yummy, why can the birds not eat lamb? (We were at a museum with taxadermical tableau.)

I would use the words "died" or "killed" in your explaination. It's part of life. Animals eat each other. My son is 4.5 too and knows Daddy goes fishing and we eat fish - because we've been upfront with it he's not that bothered about the fish dying because they're yummy.

[Junglemum]

Lucky she didn't ask me?! I guess living on a farm life and death is viewed a little differently at our place.
I just tell the truth. The girls have both been fishing and seen a fish caught, killed and then eaten for dinner. Maybe the excitement helped but killing the fish wasn't a big issue.

I think a lot of her reaction to the answer is a direct response from your emotions. If you find it upsetting and its a big deal to you then she will pick up on that. If the answer comes back as more a fact of life and not a big deal then she might not be as upset. Works with my girl anyway. If I think she's going to be upset and go in ready to pick up the pieces she generally does get upset. if I tall about something in a factual way and try not up slant it with my emotions her response is generally better.

[Jellybean29]

I've been reading Jacob the Tawny Scrawny Lion, he's only 11 weeks, but thats all about a Lion eating animals for his dinner :P
Maybe you can read a book like that and then explain that we hunt and eat animals like fish too