Any other supervisor drivers out there?

[diannescruffy]

Please tell me it gets better. DS16 got his learners a few weeks ago and he is improving each time but I'm still so nervous every time we go for a drive. My palms literally get sweaty and I know with me being nervous it's just making him more nervous. Yesterday he told me to "chill" if only I could.

Regards,
Dianne

[KimB]

Oh hun. I'm sorry but I had to chuckle. DD1 is old enough to get hers too but has sworn that neither DF nor I will be teaching her and she wouldn't be caught dead driving our cars pmsl (tarago and Pajero) as they are so uncool. Not sure how she expects to learn to drive though.

hun I would be the same. I'm nervous now and she hasn't even gotten them yet d'oh

[diannescruffy]

he told us too that he wasn't going to drive our car, falcon, but now he says it's a good "cruising" car. The problem with him is he thinks he is already an awesome driver and wants to be cool. So he's already starting to have his elbow resting and steer with one hand, oh and he likes to accelerate. Unfortunately DH doesn't have his licence so it's up to me. He keeps asking to drive into the city, I'm going to need some valium or something lol.

Regards,
Dianne

[~ Zarava Flutterby ~]

I'm not at that point yet (years away thank god) but can you look at getting him some professional lessons, the instructor will snap him out of the 'i'm an awesome driver relaxation point', maybe the instructor can take him into the city and you can deal with him after that?

My mum wouldn't get in a car to teach anyone after my aunt put her through a letterbox when they were younger so my step dad and dad taught me, but i gained more knowledge from the instructor and prob saved them a small heart attack.

[Cranky Kitten]

Heh, haven't had to do it with DD yet but have played supervisor to a couple of friends learning to drive - nerve-wracking isn't it, especially when it's your car they'll break if it goes wrong Fortunately for me though, the mates I've been driving with have been the nervous type, so a different kettle of fish.

Overconfident boy driver hmmmm? Remind the little beggar that it's not a good idea to get into bad habits until AFTER he's got his licence as if he's in the habit of the one handed steer or elbow leaning he may well just slip up and do it in the test - which is an instant fail. And will justify you in giving him poo for a decent while after. A few professional lessons if you have the cash will also teach him the importance of doing things correctly as they'll pull him up on all those little things that will fail him his test.

No real advice on how to not be nervous - other than grit your teeth and hope he passes first go

[diannescruffy]

Some driving lessons is a great idea, I told him just that, not to get into these habbits as then it's harder to get out of them. He told me when he's on his "P"s he'll teach me how to drive cool and not like a grandma .

Regards,
Dianne

[Rivlas]

I would not let the girls get their 'L's' until they had done the local driver course and get their 'L's' during that time.

I couldn't cope with teaching them said the was DH's job which he did and well. They both had a great instructor for the last few months and wouldn't take them to get their 'P's' until he was sure they could drive for life not to get their license.

A good instructor is worth his weight in gold. Make sure he allows you to go with them during a lesson, amazing how their driving changes with a parent in the back seat

[feeb]

My mum has never had her licence and my dad refused to take any of us driving!!! He instead paid for driving lessons!! I did go driving a bit with a friend of mums!

Dad is a very nervous passanger even now . We all were slow to get L's and then P's I got L's at 18 and P's just before 21, 1 Brother was L's 25 P's at 27 other brother L's at 19 and P's at 21.

[diannescruffy]

Good to know I'm not the only nervous one. Rivlas that would be awesome sitting in the back, then I really would be able to sit back and chill lol but really would be good to see how he drives with an instructor.

Regards,
Dianne

[Rivlas]

When the girls were learning it was a request from him for one of us to go. DH went.

We have METEC here, is there anything like that near you or does his school have a driving course for the older kids. I think there is one at calder park that you can do cheaply if you are a AAMI member, not sure if other insurance companies have reduced rated for learner drivers. Might be worth looking at as I would highly recommend a driving course like METEC does

[ladybird11]

If I can come in at a different angle

I recall walking out of the Transport dept on my 16th birthday with my L's permit. Dad had driven me down in my car (I bought a car before I even had a licence lol), and in the time I had gone into get the permit, he'd changed seats and was sitting in the passenger side. *Insert a big GULP here*.

It was peak hour traffic, I'd only ever driven Dad's transport yard on the weekends prior, so it was all new to me. But my old man was so calm, and I felt that he trusted me to not kill him lol! And that did wonders for my confidence. If I did become over confident or maybe change lanes without checking my blind spot he'd gently say 'no 'Missy', that'll get you into trouble one day' and that was it. No yelling matches or anything. I recall one Saturday night when it was pouring down with rain, Dad came into my room and said 'Missy, we're going for a drive' - and Mum was bewildered saying 'but its pouring out there' - and Dad made a great point that 'she'll be driving in this weather when she has her P's, so its best to expose her to it now under instruction'. And again, as calm as anything Dad made me drive on roads I was really unfamiliar with, with limited vision and at night time - and again, my confidence rose; but I was never OVER confident.

I guess what I'm prattling on about is, to place some trust in the young driver, show them you trust them - and just be calm (despite how you may feel on the inside ).

And I am also a strong advocate of exposing new drivers to different terrains and environments, so go on dirt roads, get them to drive in multi story car parks (yup, with all those big concrete pillars around), driving into the sun, wet weather etc - and if they are environments which you're not 100% confident driving in then perhaps organise some lessons with a driving instructor where you can sit in the back seat to hear what the instructor says and how they 'instruct' etc. There are so many things we do whilst driving that many times we don't stop and think of the basic motor skills we've developed over time - a skill set the 'young-in's' don't have yet. So the more knowledge you can pass on, the better driver you'll be sending out onto the roads!

Good luck

[Cranky Kitten]

If I can come in at a different angle

I recall walking out of the Transport dept on my 16th birthday with my L's permit. Dad had driven me down in my car (I bought a car before I even had a licence lol), and in the time I had gone into get the permit, he'd changed seats and was sitting in the passenger side. *Insert a big GULP here*.

It was peak hour traffic, I'd only ever driven Dad's transport yard on the weekends prior, so it was all new to me. But my old man was so calm, and I felt that he trusted me to not kill him lol! And that did wonders for my confidence. If I did become over confident or maybe change lanes without checking my blind spot he'd gently say 'no 'Missy', that'll get you into trouble one day' and that was it. No yelling matches or anything. I recall one Saturday night when it was pouring down with rain, Dad came into my room and said 'Missy, we're going for a drive' - and Mum was bewildered saying 'but its pouring out there' - and Dad made a great point that 'she'll be driving in this weather when she has her P's, so its best to expose her to it now under instruction'. And again, as calm as anything Dad made me drive on roads I was really unfamiliar with, with limited vision and at night time - and again, my confidence rose; but I was never OVER confident.

I guess what I'm prattling on about is, to place some trust in the young driver, show them you trust them - and just be calm (despite how you may feel on the inside ).

And I am also a strong advocate of exposing new drivers to different terrains and environments, so go on dirt roads, get them to drive in multi story car parks (yup, with all those big concrete pillars around), driving into the sun, wet weather etc - and if they are environments which you're not 100% confident driving in then perhaps organise some lessons with a driving instructor where you can sit in the back seat to hear what the instructor says and how they 'instruct' etc. There are so many things we do whilst driving that many times we don't stop and think of the basic motor skills we've developed over time - a skill set the 'young-in's' don't have yet. So the more knowledge you can pass on, the better driver you'll be sending out onto the roads!

Good luck

Wow, your dad sounds awesome! I to this day have trouble with driving at night in the wet, and will generally try to avoid it (I make DH drive if it's raining at night) - will have to think about that for when DD starts....

[ladybird11]

Yeah, my old man is a cool dude! He has the patience of a saint and never gets frustrated or fired up EVER.

He even did things like make me get out of the car and walk around it JUST when I (thought I had) mastered the gear changes on his manual car. Then I'd get back in and I'd have to 're learn' it all again lol. But he taught me very well!

[Miss.September]

Taking him out of his comfort zone could help too. My first drive was in a Nissan Patrol, at twilight on a rainy night. I was pooing my pants! I was put into the drivers seat everywhere we went, even driving all the way from the northern suburbs of Melbourne, to Sorrento. My stepfather was my instructor for bigger trips, and each time I drove, he would give me a score out of 10.

I PM'd you about the driver courses, but thought of this too. Good luck, Dianne

[diannescruffy]

Thanks ladies, I'm definately going to look into a driving course I'm sure it would benefit him greatly. I think it is also the feeling of not being in control and for some reason when you're in the passenger seat it seems like he's driving faster than what he actually is. Takes a bit of getting use to.

Regards,
Dianne

[Cranky Kitten]

Also, if he doesn't already know how - make sure he knows how to change a tyre, check the oil/coolant and fit new windscreen wipers. My cousins (the ones who drove with me most often) even though they knew I'd grown up on a farm so had known how to do most of this stuff since the age of about 12 still made me take a wheel off and put it back on just to prove that I could. Came in really handy when I busted a tyre on a country road miles from anywhere