My question is for anyone with 3 or more children.
If you have a close age gap (say 18months) and then a bigger gap (say 3 years), What age gap do you like more? and why?
I can't help, but this is the question that keeps going round in my head too. We have a 20month gap, and money wise, plus for my sanity, we are probably going to wait until DD is 5 and at school, so that means our youngest, DS, will be 3. I'm worried that my 2 oldest will be close, and my youngest will be left out.
Hopefully someone with some experience can come in and give us a better idea
Didn't want to subscribe without posting. Am curious to hear others answers as well as are in the same boat as Sammy Ro here! 18 months between DD's, thinking 3 years for/if #3.
I like the magical 3yr age gap. By 3yrs most can be reasonable, do quite a bit for themselves and almost if not toilet trained.
My boys are great mates and both have had the doting part when baby first arrives home. They are great at including and unfortunately giving in to DD (making very much for a little princess in the making).
Everyone will be different and have a 'magic number'
I have a GF who had her first two only 15mth's apart and found it tough going as her first one didn't walk until 18mths, so she had to be super organised come feeding time.
ETA: Sorry, didn't realise you wanted both perspectives, I can only give the 3yr age gap perspective as each is a 3yr gap. On the plus side, I was able to go back to work inbetween kids and earn some income
I think it is not only the age gap but personalities.
I have all age gaps.
My first two are 17 mths apart and at 15 and 16 are still close.
Then a 4 yr gap (my 15 and 11 don't get on) the next two are 22 mths apart and get on well (at times )
Then a 6 yr age gap.
The next three have a 24mth age gap between the three (first two 11 mths apart then my last is 13 mth gap)
I like the 18mth age gap the best, I felt it was good for the kids and me, the 11 and 13mth gap are a little to close (now 19ths, 2yrs9mths and 3yrs8mths and a real handful ) but they will go to school one year after each other.
I like that I have three groups close in age so they have someone close to there age.
(I hope all that makes sense )
I have 2 years between my first 2 and 16 months between the next 2. Honestly I preferred the 2 year age gap. Ds1 was just that little bit more independent and it made things easier. I found having 2 babies harder. Or maybe it was just 3 under 4 that was hard lol
RainbowBrite - I had to read that twice just to make sure I had it right You sure have your hands full.
Thanks Heather - any perspective is good for me.
Sas85 & Sammy, we are all in the same boat I guess.
DH and I were talking today about when to have #3 and I always thought we should wait till DD1 is 5 (starting school) and DD2 is 3 (they have a 18month gap). DH said we should try sooner ( yay for him coming round to a third) because he thinks that they should all be close in age so the youngest never feels left out.
I guess either way I would like to wait until around late June/July next year anyway, got a trip to Vegas in April/May first
I prefer smaller age gaps. Toddlers tend to settle into having a sibling easier than preschoolers (or maybe that was just mine) and the less the older children have a school/kinder routine the easier it is to slot a new baby into it.
I have a 17mth gap between DD1 and DS, and a 20mth gap between DS and DD2.
I enjoy having them close in age, they have similar likes / dislikes, play with similar toys (so for donating / removing toys from the house is an easy chore as I don't have to hang onto items for ages so the youngest can enjoy them, once the youngest outgrows it -it's gone lol), are interested in the same tv shows etc. Plus, they are great mates.
I also have realized the big sibling discounts we'll get when they go to school (private)
I have two perspectives as a 3 rd child with a 3 year gap between my sister and I after a 15 month gap between my brother and sister I always felt left out and like the odd one our and never wanted that for my kids. However as fate decided there is 16.5 mk this between dd1 & dd2 then just under 3 yrs to ds. I think both gaps have their pros and cons. With the little gap it was really busy but then they play beautifully together most of the time now. Also having a 4 & 3 year old with the baby makes for two great little helpers. All in all I have found 2-3 easier than 1-2 not sure if it is the bigger gap or just that ds is a super Bub!! Not sure if this ramble answers the question or not
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Age gaps
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) because he thinks that they should all be close in age so the youngest never feels left out.
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