OK so DS goes to childcare 3 days a week and is quite friendly with most of the kids in his room. He has been invited to one of the boys birthdays in a few weeks. It is from 11am to 3 pm. I am thinking that a lot of the other kids have been invited (it is a small childcare of approx 20 children/day divided between 3 rooms) and on the invites it says that all mum's, dad's, sisters and bro's etc... are invited (quite a number of the children have older siblings in the other rooms).
I have a workshop on that day and had already arranged for OH to be watching DS. The problem is that he doesn't want to take DS to the party and stay, he doesn't feel comfortable. I don't want DS to miss the party, all the other children will talk about it both before and after the party as has happened at other parties.
So I figure these are my choices 1) I don't go to my workshop so I can take DS to the party 2) make other half suck it up and make him go 3) let OH drop DS off at the party and pick him up (he was 3 in march) 4) DS doesn't go and spends the day with his dad (as was originally planned)
argh.... I don't think I can make everyone happy... any suggestions?
Option 2, personally I know how annoying it is for DH to say no I don't want to as I don't know anyone suck it up princess LOL
I think he is way to young to leave at a party with people you don't know and he is not old enough to not need someone watching what he is doing. No way would I drop my 3 year old off at a party as the host will be way to busy to watch over him, unless you know someone else at party that you can ask to watch him.
thanks for your replies ladies and I am also not comfortable leaving DS at this party on his own, I agree I think he is too young and didn't want to suggest it to OH as it he would probably latch onto it so he could get out of it. I think I am going to have to be strong and stand up to OH and make him suck it up.... I don't overly enjoy these things but should DS miss out cause OH doesn't want to be uncomfortable?
OH is really anti-social, he doesn't like doing much with anyone he doesn't know. I even wonder if he was open to admitting that he has anxieties to it... surely it's unfair on him to expect him to take DS if he really doesn't want to? is it?
Would it be inappropriate for one of DS's nan to take him to the party? I suppose that is another option
How important is the workshop? Can it be rescheduled? I'd be tempted to go with that option... because work is pretty un-important to me and I generally try anything to get out of work if I can
Otherwise yep I'd be going with option 2 as well. Why is he uncomfortable - doesn't know the other parents?
ETA - you posted while I was typing! If he gets anxieties about it... might not be fair to force him into it?
If one of the grandparents were willing it might be a decent compromise, but I'd be suggesting that OH goes as well so he can get to know the other daycare parents. Or at least getting him to be more involved so he's more comfortable with this kind of thing. Because there will be plenty more of them over the years, believe me!
If it's in a few weeks you could otherwise have a playdate with a couple of the kids + parents so he's at least met them before and will have someone to talk to - I get that it's pretty daunting walking into a party at someone's place knowing absolutely no-one, as I've done it several times with DD
I would go for either OH taking him or a nan. I agree with these things being awkward but the best part is that at 3 years of age you don't get much time to sit around and chat. If he follows DS around "to make sure he is ok" and play with him then not only can he avoid most idle conversation but that everyone will think he is an awesome daddy.
Totally agree with krysalyss and was thinking the same thing. There actually won't be a lot of time to sit around and chat iykwim? There will be the odd one or two line convo all day I bet!
Either OH or a Nan would be my options - if the hosts are saying all family, older siblings etc are welcome they will not mind in the slightest that a Nan is coming. Having said that it would depend on how important the workshop was to me/work etc as OP mentioned.
They really shouldn't have a problem with his nan taking him. You could always mention it when you RSVP and say that both of you are busy that day but if its ok if his nan takes him along. It would be a real shame for him to miss out. And it would be unfair to push it on your OH if he has anxiety issues.
ok so I spoke to OH last night and he has agreed to take him, now I am going to RSVP before he has a chance to back out I am not overly keen on these things either and I am torn between feeling like he should just suck it up (like I would) and being aware that he isn't an overly social person.
OP my workshop is more of a personal development course and I really don't want to miss it but would to make sure that DS didn't. Lucky for me it hasn't come to that.
it is tough sometimes going to things where you don't know anyone, but i always think the benefit of having a LO is that you have someone to either keep you occupied or gives you a topic to talk about with other parents to get conversation started.
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3 yr old birthday party... WWYD?
I am not overly keen on these things either and I am torn between feeling like he should just suck it up (like I would) and being aware that he isn't an overly social person.
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