question

[Tegam]

So i do not like and do not use CC or CIC.... But i have a dilemma....

Miss Molly is 9months old, she has been breast feeding over night her whole life...maybe 4 x 6-8hr stretches.... She was very slow to start solids, maybe 2 weeks now of a bit here and there and there days now of three meals but they arent large.... She is 9kgs so not really in any need of food!

She has been waking 2nd hourly for 4 nights now. I have made sure she is feed 2nd hourly through the day too as well as her food....

But the thing is she wakes thru the day and then re settles ( she cries but i just cant get to her straight away when the other 3 kids and on my own when DH is away) So its not CC or CIO its just impossible to be at her straight away...then she is back down for another hour or more....sometimes she does this twice in one nap time, sometimes sleeping up to 3-4hrs...

SO the question is....would you leave her to have a cry at night? Thru the day sometimes its probably 5mins she is waiting for me (crying). I think it would be very hard for me to lie there and listen too her but if she is going to go back to sleep and then have a better sleep and feed??????

I just dont know

What would you do??

I am asking in here as i do not need 1000 people tell me that its ok to CC, i like to teach my children that i will be there when they need me!

[MissEm]

Maybe you can go in there at night and pat her bum or rub her tummy until she calms down and goes off to sleep?

[luna moth]

I can't believe she's heavier than my food machine! Wow! you clearly make some awesome milk. No wonder she wants so much.

Can you re-settle her without feeding overnight? Maybe at every second waking just rock or snuggle her back - drop one feed the first night, then another one a couple of nights later, and work down to see if it will increase her day time appetite?

I don't think there's anything wrong with leaving her for a bit to see if she'll re-settle. Why not go with your instincts? Let her go, and when your heart says "No, that's not right" then go on in there! She comes from a loving house full of smiling faces - she absolutely knows there's always somebody around for her. It shows in that gorgeous smile.

They're my ideas for now. Take or leave as required!

[Tegam]

Maybe you can go in there at night and pat her bum or rub her tummy until she calms down and goes off to sleep?

Nope she can smell my milk, it just works her up more if i am there but not feeding, she does this cute but frustrating thing of bending down to the boob and trying to feed thru my top!!!

I don't think there's anything wrong with leaving her for a bit to see if she'll re-settle. Why not go with your instincts? Let her go, and when your heart says "No, that's not right" then go on in there! She comes from a loving house full of smiling faces - she absolutely knows there's always somebody around for her. It shows in that gorgeous smile.

My mummas voice is so strong at night, id lie there thinking, if id fed her we would all be back to sleep...and i dont like to wake the others....grrrr

thank you i love thinking she know how much we all adore her

9kgs and KILLING my back she is very tall tho, just like her mum!

[~Kim~]

Tegam, probably no real help but DS fed 2hourly on and off until he was 17 months old. Around the clock. I was more worried about it bothering everyone else (very few of whom whose opinion really mattered).
But then I figured, I was doing what was right for me and my child. And that was all that mattered. Didn't go on forever, i was happy, he was happy, we were all good.
You do what makes it happier/easier/quicker.

[Tegam]

thanks kim...all mine have fed like this but she is the first to show signs of re settling.... and with the 4 kids and school drop offs and the like.... i am up sometimes 10 times a night and i am suffering.....


and i agree i dont give a flip what others think of my parenting,

[crumpet]

so you knwo what i do with DD, she is left to whinge/cry for a bit before i go in....

basically i dont know if it will help knowing this but in general, summah goes to sleep within 10 minutes.... she will whinge, yell out, growl, scream within that 10 minutes, if she sounds upset i obviously stick my head in but its usually just a protest and given my.... hmmm temper and lack of patience and DH's.... im not suprised she does this, give it 5-10 mins and she is out cold, very very rarely does it go on longer than 10 minutes.

I think ( coz im a expert and all ) that if you can handle it, give it a try, leave her go 5 or as many minutes as your comfortable with and see what happens. if she can do it during the day, she may be able to do it at night too.....

[glenny_c]

hey honey,I found that Katherine started stirring and resettling at night. Took a couple of times of me getting up to prepare her bottle and by the time the bottle was ready she'd be asleep again. Now I leave her for a short time (maybe 2-3 mins) to see if she will settle down or if she's going to rev up for a feed or cuddle.

I know what you mean about lying in bed thinking about it though. I often will just think "if I just gave her a bottle she'd prob not take much but at least we'd be back in bed and I'd be sleeping rather than listening out to the baby.

It's such a hard one. I'm exactly like you. I would never want my bub to think that if she cries Dad or I won't be there for her but I think sometimes Katie cries a little as almost a reflex rather than because she's upset if you know what I mean. If it goes on longer than a couple of mins then I'll get up to her but sometimes she's still half asleep and then she uses the milk as a pacifier rather than because she's hungry.

I don't think I've helped you at all reading that back :: I'm not really much use at all am I?

[Tegam]

No it was nice to read Glenny! and look Miss K is now older in weeks than she was in your tummy sad really!

Yes i think that maybe i am too quick to get to her at night, i am worried ill wake the others so i jump up to her,,.,,sometimes i just think its wind!

[glenny_c]

Tegam- I hadn't thought that about her age. Wow! She's been out of my tummy almost 3 weeks longer than she was in there! It is sad but you should see her now Amelia!!

[MrsFabuloso]

If you think she will resettle, give it a go. Let her grizzle for say 5mins or so and see what she does. If it doesn't work in a few days, just do what you normally do. You know Caelan still feeds 2-3hrly round the clock, and I know you know that is totally normal too. I have just been on my own for 6 nights with the kids and I had two days of being up to them 10 times through the night. Plus one night of being sick myself. The other nights it was less, but still something like 6-7 times or something ridiculous like that. Today I am a basket case. I have a headache, I can't focus my eyes properly and if I sit for more than 5mins, I start to nod off. I'm grumpy and have a short fuse. I'm unmotivated and just don't wanna! I am trying to be pleasant because it's noones fault, but it's really testing my limits. You can't go on like that. Noone can function well with so little sleep. You have to think of you too sweets. Unfortunately, noone else will.

[KitFaerie]

I'd try it once at night, if she's used to resettling (OMG there are babies who do that???) during the day then it's consistent to give it a shot at night, it's not abandonment or CIO, it's just consistency. Plus I know that if it turned into sad grizzling or if you felt at all yucky about it then you'd get up/feed her.

I know sometimes Sammy gets grumpy when he hits light sleep, but if I pat him or try and feed him to get him back into deep sleep he wakes up and shouts at Mummy Then I have to feed him and pat him for a long time, lol.

[onthefly]

Dunno. What do you reckon?
DD resettles at night sometimes. I can tell from the noise she makes whether she's goign to or is 'awake'. It's a breif thing, no longer than 1 minute (tops), after that he's definitely awake and going to get upset. I think you'll know if she actually needs you, right?