thread: Not sure what's going on

  1. #1
    2014 BellyBelly RAK Recipient.

    Mar 2008
    Vic
    4,806

    Not sure what's going on

    DD is a pretty calm, chilled out kid. She's a fussy eater and has been a pretty average sleeper. Night times lately, she's been a bit clingy, so rather than fight it, we've been putting her to bed in her own bed like normal, but when she gets up, we've been letting her come in and sleep with us. There's no pattern to the times she's getting up. She's fine during the day.

    Once she's in bed with us, she has to be holding my hand, or have her feet in my back. Little annoying when I have a lot of trouble sleeping myself, but I can deal with that.

    Last night she got up while I was watching a movie, and stayed awake until I went to bed. She came with me to bed and stayed awake while I read my book. When I told her I was going to turn the light off, she started to get upset. So I left it on for a while, kept talking to her. Finally I said that the light was being turned off and she said okay. Right through the night though, she woke up crying, thrashing. I nearly fell out of bed twice! She seems to be getting worse at night and I'm not sure what's caused it. Nothing has changed, routine is the same for going to bed, and she goes willingly. Bad dreams perhaps? I don't know.

    Yesterday she played with the kids of my local BB girls, and she had a ball. She was tired when they left, but didn't sleep. Maybe last night she was overtired? Or is this just a phase that they all go through? Any tips will be appreciated.

  2. #2

    May 2008
    Melbourne, Vic
    8,631

    Its tough when things change and you can't figure out why, hey?

    DD was a terror to put to bed last night too... I put it down to the big day and her longer than we'd like day sleep.

    Have you thought about getting a night light? Something that glows in her room so she's not in the dark? Or do you already have one...?

    Wonder why she got upset when you turned the light out?

  3. #3
    2014 BellyBelly RAK Recipient.

    Mar 2008
    Vic
    4,806

    She has a night light in her room that we leave on, and there's a fair bit of light in our room once the lights are off - we have a street light out the front that filters through and our alarm clock lights are insanely bright too.

  4. #4

    May 2008
    Melbourne, Vic
    8,631

    Hmm ok... sorry Pac... I'm not sure

  5. #5
    2014 BellyBelly RAK Recipient.

    Mar 2008
    Vic
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    All good, OP. Maybe we should plan a sleepover with our two DD's and they can keep each other entertained throughout the night

  6. #6
    Moderator

    Dec 2006
    Smidgen-ville
    3,736

    My DS1 (who was a pretty good sleeper) went through a phase of waking at night and being quite distressed and only being able to sleep with company.He was about 2yo i think. It wasn't every night - but maybe 2-4 times a week. DH was very anti the whole thing and felt he was doing it for attention, so i would get up to him on my own and we would sleep on the couch together. Me sleeping on his floor wasn't enough for him, he seemed to need cuddles and physical contact.
    He might have been doing it for attention, in which case he got attention. Just like if he was hungry i'd give him food! He seemed genuinely upset to me and he eventually stopped doing it (3 months maybe).

  7. #7

    May 2008
    Melbourne, Vic
    8,631

    All good, OP. Maybe we should plan a sleepover with our two DD's and they can keep each other entertained throughout the night
    DD would love it. The times we've tried to put her to sleep at my sister's house on niece's trundle, DD just wants to party. Niece gets upset and wants to sleep Our two would have a ball

    ...He might have been doing it for attention, in which case he got attention. Just like if he was hungry i'd give him food! He seemed genuinely upset to me and he eventually stopped doing it (3 months maybe).
    That's such a good perspective Lenny. I hadn't thought of it from that angle.

    Pac, I think you're doing a wonderful job responding to her needs to the best of your ability.

  8. #8
    Registered User

    Feb 2010
    on a big patch of paradise.
    3,720

    DD1 is a couple on months younger then your DD. She does this occasionally too. She actually wakes very distressed telling me her legs hurt and wants them rubbed. I put it down to growing pains. She has always been a good sleeper and does not like sleeping in my bed but when she wakes up like this she wants to sleep with me.

    Might not be what is happening with your DD but just thought I would throw it out there as a possibility.

  9. #9
    Registered User

    Jan 2008
    in my head
    1,975

    DS has been a chronic bad sleeper but he did improve briefly around the 22-24month mark and then went downhill again. He has been doing similar lately, wanting to get into bed with us, needing to be in direct physical contact, staying awake for hours at a time (although that is not new here).

    I have about a million theories about sleep LOL but one thing that has occurred to me recently is that this could be a cognitive development thing. He is the same age as your DD and I have wondered whether it is his imagination that is now keeping him awake (or preventing sleep in the first place). He has been exposed to heaps of stuff at child care but even at home we read lots of stories every day and he does watch some TV as well. Atm, he is particularly into bear stories and the gruffalo, he pretends to be a bear or the gruffalo or pretends that he is being chased by them etc. There is lots of falling into rivers and running through fields and falling over and needing help and caves and....you get the idea. This is during the day I'm talking about but I have been wondering if he is also thinking of this stuff at night time too? Hence the need for greater reassurance. He can imagine scary type stuff anytime he wants to now.

    I hope it passes quickly for you. DS is also an annoying bed companion and needs to be lying some part of his body over mine. We have to face him too otherwise he climbs up on our heads (usually mine) and lays his cheek on my cheek

    ETA - Can I send DS south to attend that sleep over by any chance lol

  10. #10
    Registered User

    Nov 2008
    Melbourne
    2,008

    We've had similar things happening at our house over the last couple of weeks. On Sunday night the only place DS would sleep was on top of me. And if I moved him once he was asleep he'd wake up screaming within 5 minutes... We also had what DH thought was a sleep walking incident last night...

    ATM I'm putting it down to bad dreams. I read somewhere ages ago that it wasn't till around 2 years old that children developed the ability to have bad dreams. I can't remember what the theory was based on now, but it made sense at the time. And now that we're going through this I can't help but think bad dreams are the cause. When he wakes he seems genuinely distressed to be apart from me, like he is scared of something.

    At this stage, we're just rolling with the punches so to speak and hoping it's passed long before bubs arrives.

  11. #11
    2014 BellyBelly RAK Recipient.

    Mar 2008
    Vic
    4,806

    Lenny - I'm happy to give her the attention, she's not one that normally craves it, so it's kind of nice having her hold my hand as she's trying to go to sleep in our bed. It's the overtiredness in me that makes me have enough! I like what you said, makes sense.

    OP - LOL, your poor niece! I reckon it'd be pretty funny listening to what our two would get up to in the wee hours.

    Kazzo - Thanks for that. I'm open to all suggestions. She hasn't had a growth spurt for a little while, could be a possibility.

    Kaz- I get you on the million theories. It's so hard! Right when you find something that works, BAM, it no longer works! And as far as the sleepover goes, the more the merrier!

    Miss E - That makes sense too. DD's imagination has gone wild lately. She sometimes pretends to be a lion or a bear, but she laughs like mad. Maybe there's more to that.

    It's so hard when I'm tired too. Then I just want a solution. But looking at all the responses, it could be each and every one of those things, or it could be something entirely different. It's always good to know that others are going through the same thing. Sorry that you are though!