Help, need an excuse to cancel

[Artechim]

This morning one of the kindy mums called and asked if DS would like to go to her place for a play later. I know the lady quite well and we have had a few play dates in the past. She only asked if DS wanted to come around, then later in the conversation she asked if it would just be DS and the baby. I said that DD1 would have to come too (DH is out), then she asked if DD1 could stay at home because it would be "too hectic" with all of them.

I don't really want to go now that it is quite clear that she doesn't want DD1 there!

Are there any believable excuses I can use given that we were fine to come when she called an hour ago?

[briggsy's girl]

last minute headache?
baby didn't have nap when she should so you're going to have to stay home so she can sleep again?

[Doing my best]

I would just say that unless you can take all the kids, you can't go..

[Traveller]

say that DS has just vomited and you suspect gastro.

[tracyh]

Yeah gastro

[Me+him+bub]

just say hubby can't watch her so she has to go or you can't come

[Nai]

You have no one to look after the other kids so it's all or nothing.

[Artechim]

Thanks. DH is out today so I actually do have to take DD1, I told the mum that and she said it was alright but didn't sound very happy about it. I just feel bad for DD1 taking her somewhere that she isn't welcome.

I would go with gastro but she knows we had it a couple of weeks ago. Might blame the baby

[Tinks]

Just tell her the truth - that you can't go because you have to take DD1 and she doesn't want her there.

[eza]

Agree with others - If your DD1 can't go then you can't also, Can't exactly leave her at home by herself!!

[Tegam]

I'd be honest, all or nothing. Or suggest a park if it would be to hectic at her house! Gee it's only one more, not like my brood of 4! Mean women.

[Artechim]

She knows I have to bring DD1, she said "if you have to bring her, then I suppose it will be o.k". Now I feel like I am bringing along an unwanted guest.

Is it normal to ask people to leave their other kids at home when you have a playdate?

[Tinks]

No, it's not normal, it's rude.

[[M]umma[M]ia]

How rude of her! Just tell her the truth. Seems she needs to be brought down a few pegs anyway.

[Ginger]

why don't you just go? if she doesn't want dd1 there it is her problem.

[Artechim]

Probably should just go, but I know I would spend the whole time apologizing for any little thing DD may do and worrying what the other mum was thinking about her (she is very prone to tantrums atm).

Anyway, problem solved - someone else just invited themselves around. They are DH's friends so I suggested that 3-4pm might be better because DH would be home but they said now suited them better so they are on their way. DD1 is asleep on the couch and the house is a mess. I am such a phone doormat!

[Boo Boo]

How rude of her....if I asked a little one over for a playdate, I would expect the siblings too....what did she expect you to do with DD1 if your DH was out??? Good you have an excuse now.

[Maruschke]

I'd tell the truth so she knows in future not to make such requests. You can't keep making excuses forever.