Teenage DD

[SarahM]

Hi all
My youngest DD is 14 and boy is she a handful ATM She talks to older boys etc.... I'm worried she is going to do something silly .... We use to be really Close but now she is a teenager she thinks she can do what ever she like's .... My older 2 tell me just about everything well oldest one mainly i just don't know what to do about DD I was thinking of getting her the pregnancy bar just to be safe I am going to talk to my DR on Monday and see what he thinks i just can't do it any more
Sarah

[Chocaholic]

Have you sat down with her and spoken, adult to adult?

Explain why you are worried and set some mutual boundaries.

[k4t]

First off let me say I'm sure I'm in no way qualified to give advice on parenting a teenager. I feel for you. Especially at that age some girls can be really hard to connect with.

I gather from your post that its mainly sex that you're worried about? Or is it other issues as well?

Discussing contraception with your daughter is a really good way to bring up the issue (I assume you're referring to implanon?) but I think it's important that your daughter feels actively involved in the decision making process, eg going to the doctor to get information together etc. Also, don't forget how important it is to discuss stuff like STIs, HPV vaccination etc. Most teenagers are as scared about getting pregnant as their parents but I don't think many of them realize how common STIs like chlamydia are and the potential long term effects.

What's your daughters relationship like with her older siblings? Don't forget they could be your best allies if she's not willing to open up to you.

[Onelittleprincess]

I agree. If she will talk to her older siblings use them. My younger brother will tell my DH everythingwho then tells me and I decide if mum or dad should know or if it's something we can deal with or talk to him about.

[diannescruffy]

Hi Sarah, teenagers are great for making us worry lol. I'd sit down with her and explain your fears, I hope she opens up to you, all the best.

Regards,
Dianne

[SarahM]

Have you sat down with her and spoken, adult to adult?

Explain why you are worried and set some mutual boundaries.

yes we have but she just thinks we are running her life and storms out of the house

[Chocaholic]

Is there anyone she trusts that you can enlist to help? Maybe a friends mother or an older friend?

Being a teenager is very difficult (though I think worse for the parents).

[SarahM]

Hi
I have made a APP at the Dr's for DD to she if she will open up to him (fingers crossed) I don't know most of her friends she wont talk to me her Step Dad or brother and sister or her grandmother she doesn't see her real father very often as he works and lives 4 hours away and has a new g/f
Sarah
I will let you all know how we get on

[Chocaholic]

Good luck

[Shades]

Could you take the matter-of-fact but still hard-nosed approach and take her to get checked out for an STD panel, given implanon, given the HPV vaccines and just say that you want to make sure at least if she does have/is having sex she won't be passing anything on to her partners - casually mention how embarrassing it is to have to tell your partner to get checked out for something you may have given them, and how teenagers often take great delight in spreading gossip about who has what STI and etc, and basically scare the living daylights out of her so she'll at least be sure to use protection if she does decide to have sex?
Maybe that's too devious and underhanded though - I'm not a parent of a teen so not really qualified to speak. Though that's pretty much the tactic used with me and it worked brilliantly.

[ShayMitch]

You should sit it down and have a heart to heart talk with her. Communication is very important so that she will know that you are there and even though it would be awkward to answer questions about it, you still need to discuss it. Tell her about the limitations and most specially tell her about the risk of being sexually active, give her information such as the diseases like STD, HPV, AIDS, HEPA-B and the risk of being pregnant at a young age (the responsibility and dangers of delivery). They key is really to discuss/communicate/talk.