thread: Toddler regression, of a different kind...

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Nov 2008
    Melbourne
    2,008

    Toddler regression, of a different kind...

    We got DS a big boy bed about 3 months a go. From the minute he saw it he was in love with it. There were absolutely no transition problems (well not until now). We actually left the cot in his room just in case there were a few teething issues, but then quickly found that it worked wonders as a deterrent for stopping him getting out of bed (we had a rule, get out of your big boy bed 3 times and you will have to sleep in the baby bed).

    So fast forward to a couple of weeks ago. We got DS a new chest of drawers which meant that there was no longer space for the cot. Moved it into the spare bed and that was that. But we have also been having a few issues with him coming into our bed at night. It started when he was sick a couple of weeks earlier and then continued. I don't have a big issue with this, but it was getting earlier and earlier and he was pretty much coming in at 11.30pm every night. So I decided to start putting him back into his bed. Again, no real issues. He was getting up 2 or 3 times a night for the first couple of nights, but quite happily getting back into his bed.

    Then, last Wednesday night he wakes up at 1.30am, comes into our room. I escort him back to his with no problems. But then he starts asking for the 'baby bed'. There was no way he was going to get into his big boy bed, so I got DS to bring the cot back in, put him in it and he went back to sleep no issues. First thing in the morning I take the cot out because I don't want it to become 'the thing'. But that night after cuddles, he wants the baby bed again. So we go along with it. And have been going along with it ever since... He's having his naps in his big boy bed (because I rock him to sleep for them), happily has stories in there and will get in there with me and DH. But when it comes to going to bed, it has to be the baby bed.

    Now, I'm happy to go along with this for awhile... But I am also conscious of our new bub arriving in a few months. I don't want to let this go on too long and then have to force the issue and have him end up feeling like the baby took it away IYKWIM? I'm hoping it will resolve itself, but would've thought he would be over it by now.

    So, how and when would you wise women tackle this one?

    ETA: funnily enough, now that he's sleeping in the cot he's also sleeping through the night again.

  2. #2

    Mar 2004
    Sparta
    12,662

    Could you get some sides for the big bed so he feels more enclosed?

  3. #3
    Registered User

    Jan 2009
    In my own little fantasy world
    2,946

    Do you have a side rail on his bed? Maybe he feels unsafe. We got one from Target for DS's bed.

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Nov 2008
    Melbourne
    2,008

    Yeah we've already got the side rails on both sides...

    Everything I read about regression says it's to do with stress. Other than me being pregnant (which we haven't made a big deal out of) I can't really think of anything, aside from escorting him back to his bed when he woke up. And even that didn't seem to be a problem, there weren't any tears or complaints and he'd just go straight back to sleep.

  5. #5
    Registered User
    Add helle on Facebook

    Sep 2008
    Bunbury, Western Australia
    3,963

    If only we could know the inner most workings of a toddlers mind!
    Can you take the cot sides off do its the "same" as a bed?

    Eta. How old is he? Do you think using the cot as a deterrent for keeping him in bed could have created a bit of a habit? So now he's just expecting that that's just how a big bed sorta works now? Iykwim
    Last edited by helle; November 30th, 2011 at 01:47 PM.

  6. #6
    Registered User

    Nov 2008
    Melbourne
    2,008

    If only we could know the inner most workings of a toddlers mind!
    How right you are Helle!

    The morning after I started this thread, DS woke, got out of the baby bed and said 'baby bed away'. We wheeled it into the spare room together and it's stayed there since, he's happily slept in the big boy bed ever since, without even a mention of the baby bed.

    I had hoped it would work out this way, but was loosing faith in the 'this will pass' mantra. Just goes to show...

  7. #7
    Registered User

    Nov 2008
    Melbourne
    2,008

    Eta. How old is he? Do you think using the cot as a deterrent for keeping him in bed could have created a bit of a habit? So now he's just expecting that that's just how a big bed sorta works now? Iykwim
    Sorry, just saw this... No, I don't think that had anything to do with it. He's only been put in the cot a couple of times in the three months since we got the bed. And on both those occassions I only left him there for 10 mins before letting him sleep in the bed, on the condition that he didn't get out. Personally, I found this was the best way to teach him to stay in bed. A friend of mine has just put her twins into beds and was going through the whole in and out of bed thing. She tried a porta cot in their room the other day and has only had to put one of them in there once for them to learn that once they're in bed they stay in bed.