thread: Giving up the dummy - support needed

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Apr 2008
    4,427

    Giving up the dummy - support needed

    Hi All,

    DD gave dummies to Santa (She is 2yrs 9mths). We are on night 4.

    Night 1 - Screaming tantrum for 30min, hitting, kicking me, kicking legs on florr, throwing toys around room, then crashed out asleep)
    Night 2 - fell asleep on my lap on the couch (tranferred to bed) woke in middle of the night then settled back to sleep next to me after asking for it a few times.
    Night 3 - Asked for it when getting tired then watched one of her dvds, then came and lay on my bed and fell asleep without it.

    Daytimes she doesnt have a sleep but she has asked fo rit a couple of times. We had a massive drive home from Gold Coast to Sydney yesterday and she did it (we did it) without the dummy.

    I just feel like I need some support. I feel mean. The other day she said, "Im sad mummy, I just want to cry okay". Broke my heart but then at other times, she says "Santa took the dummies I love my toys, thank you Santa". So i know she understands.

    I am just looking for advice and support from fellow members who are giving up the dummy or others who have been there, done that who an give me some light at the end of the tunnel support.

    Many thanks. Hopefully one day soon, I can give others advice on giving up the dummy

  2. #2

    Jan 2011
    Hunter Valley, NSW
    305

    Well done on sticking to your guns and not giving the dummy back. I am not up to that stage yet and am dreading it! Not that my DD has it all the time, only when she is tired or in the car. I hope I can be as strong as you have been when it comes time for it.

  3. #3
    Registered User
    Add *TripleJ* on Facebook

    Jan 2009
    Diggers Rest VIC
    2,945

    i must be horrible i made DS throw them in the bin lol he kept asking i just said sorry buddy u threw it out its so much better without it we kept losing it it was madness good luck

  4. #4

    Jul 2009
    Australia
    5,102

    BIG to the both of you.

    I am getting rid of my DD's dummy when she is 18 months which is only 2.5 weeks away. We have started slowly weaning her off by not allowing her to have it during the day and shes doing really well. We have it strapped to her so at times she goes to grab it realises its not there and says "where is it?" and we say "i dont know" and she forgets all about it.

    I'm dreading night time as shes always gone to sleep with it so might start off slowly by not taking it to bed and see how she goes.

    What you are doing is great and its great she understands. I say be persistant and hopefully soon she will forget all about it.

  5. #5
    Registered User

    Oct 2008
    Newport, VIC
    1,885

    You've done really well to get this far and stick to your guns. From what it sounds like the worst is (hopefully) over. It's good that she understands and in the long run you know that you are doing the right thing.

  6. #6
    Registered User

    Jan 2011
    133

    only another day or two and she won't even ask for it again, believe me you have done an awesome job not giving in.

  7. #7
    Registered User

    Nov 2008
    in the ning nang nong
    12,163

    Ali - it sounds like she's adjusting fabulously!!

    Well done to you and her

    A couple more days, and FX she won't even miss it

  8. #8
    Registered User

    Dec 2007
    Melbourne
    1,628

    Just before Christmas DD lost her 2 remaining dummies. I had been telling her when her dummies broke I wasn't buying anymore. She is 3.
    We have had a few tears and it is frustrating as it does take her longer to go to sleep. Especially seeing as we found the lost dummies plus others (we haven't given them to her) but it is so worth not having the tantrums from her wanting it all day.
    It does get easier . DD rarely asks for it anymore except at bedtime but accepts it when I tell her she is the one who lost them.

  9. #9
    Registered User

    Sep 2008
    Sydney
    1,413

    We tried last night to not give DD her dummy - I thught she was going to be sick, I gave in just couldn't hack her hystericalness!

  10. #10
    Registered User

    Nov 2011
    NSW
    91

    You are doing so well! My son is addicted to his and I want to get rid of it do badly. He now only gets the dummy when he is going to sleep or on long car trips.

    He's 16 months. Wondering if I should do it now or wait until he's a little bit older? My next bub will def not get a dummy!

  11. #11
    Registered User

    Jul 2006
    Melbourne
    4,895

    Ali,

    Sounds like your DD is doing very well without her dummy - she is verbalizing how she is feeling,rather than sucking on her dummy - that is huge.

    Hugs to you though, it is really tough emotionally as a parent to deny your child something they love so much - DD was the same but she is fine now, well adjusted

  12. #12
    Registered User

    Apr 2008
    4,427

    Thanks so much girls.
    I feel like we are coming out the other side now.

    Last night she fell asleep without asking for it once and today she just had a massive stack and smashed he head on the corner of the coffee table and she didnt ask for her dummy (normally she would as a comfort thing).

    I cant thank you all enough for your support. I will continue to keep you updated on how the next couple of days progress.

    RhiChiChi- You are so right about it being tough emotionally. I am glad to hear your DD is well-adjusted.

    I remember how emotional I was about giving her a dummy when she was only 6 weeks old. She really did love it though.