Losing it over lost sleep

[EmmaJane]

I'm at my wit's end. Check that, I'm long past that stage. I'm at the not coping stage and on the worst days swearing my head off, some times at my kid which I hate myself for, and fight off thoughts of self-harm. How can a not-quite-18 month old need less than 9 hours of broken sleep overnight and 2 hours at nap time? I need 9 hours of solid sleep to feel rested, I'd take 6; I've had a 6 hour stretch maybe 10 times since T was born and I feel utterly broken and unhinged. A psychologist I've spoken to recently tells me everyone's sleep requirements vary, which of course I accept, but can night after night of multiple wakings that frequently last more than a couple of minutes over 9-10 hours be healthy for one so young?

[Santosha]

Oh I hear you. About to post my own vent of a similar theme... if my little guy will stay asleep for long enough to let me type. Sleep deprivation is awful and I totally get that it makes you feel 'broken'. Another one losing my mind over here. Huuuuge hugs Hun. I wish I had a solution for you. My only suggestion is to ensure (as much as you can, and I know how hard this is... see my post if I ever get it done) that he's getting enough sleep through the day and going to bed early, as it seems here that lack of nap-sleep and over-tiredness makes the night sleeps worse.

Sending you vibes for a deep, long sleep tonight. xoxo

[forshelby]

I agree with Santosha. Sleep promotes sleep, apparently. If DS has crappy day sleeps, the night is a shambles. I spent the first 6 months.of his.life feeling broken and tired and struggled to cope. It seems our sleep issues are back, I think teething and learning to crawl has disrupted the half decent nights we were having.

What helped me was to forget about everything except essentials. Sleeping, eating., paying bills. I would nap religiously when DS did. On those terrible swearing my head off days, I would go out. Anywhere. Usually to wander a mall aimlessly. A wise woman once said it's much harder to be a homicidal maniac in public. She was right. Another thing I found useful was to be very gentle with myself. Avoiding stressful situations as much as possible, and reminding myself that I was a good mother.

These suggestions come from the.obvious basket, but I'll put it out there anyway. I substituted sleep for food. Food gave me the energy to.carry on through the.sleep.deprivation. Enlist help. Even if it's only 2hrs a month, get someone to take over for a bit so you can recharge even a little. Do you think a sleep school might help?

I know the pain of sleepless nights. It really affects our ability to cope, and to function. Give yoirself an RDO asap, and go.from there. Sadly I never found the magic solution, but things did improve by themselves. And if all else fails, remember- this too shall pass.