Should we stay or should we go now?

[OceanPrincess]

Isn't that a line from a song?

Anyway - DH's sister lives in Wollongong. We are in Melbourne. She, her DH and their 2 kiddies have made a few trips to Melb, we have been up there once. She is Melb born and bred, moved up there for BIL's work, she comes down and stays with my IL's, it's somewhat easier for them. They either drive down (her kids are car sleepers - 18mths and just 4mths old) so they have their car or they fly, BIL's relos drive them to Sydney airport and then my IL's pick them up in Melb and have a spare car / car seats. Little cost for them.

So the new DD is having a "naming day" in March. We are invited, of course, and trying to decide if we should make the effort and go.

Option 1: Fly. Up Friday morning, home Sunday arvo. Need to organise lift to airport, flights, hire car, hire car seats, accommodation, including portacot (could make fly that up), drive 1hr to Wollongong. Cost probably 800-1000 or more, once we factor in flights/accomm/hire stuff.

Option 2: Drive. Leaving maybe late afternoon Friday, put a DVD on when they get bored, stop for some dinner, get them into PJs and hope they will crash out eventually. Cost probably 500-800 once we factor in petrol/accomm. At least we'd have our own stuff. Drive home maybe Sunday day???

Option 3: Stay home. Put it in the too hard basket.

TBH I don't even know what a "naming day" is. They have never made the effort to come down specifically for one of our events (they were still in Melb for our wedding), the ones they have come to has been because they have been down here for another reason and it has been coincidence.

1 & 2 are both so unattractive right now. We've only done 4hrs in the car with the kids. The last time we tried to do the late afternoon/evening drive thing, they stayed awake the whole time and by the last hour were screaming, even with the Wiggles DVD.

We went up for her 30th when we had just DD. Getting to Sydney, fine. Had a lovely day in Sydney (got the train into the city) with DD, awesome. Took her to the aquarium, had a Lindt iced chocolate, great. Then attempted to get the train to Wollongong. Almost killed us it was so terrible. DD wouldn't sit still, she was tired, hungry, grumpy, it was like a commuter train service and we had all our luggage, horrible.

Our families aren't close. I have issues with SIL and how she treats my kids... I get the impression she thinks our kids are spoiled, badly-behaved brats (I prefer the term "high-energy" ) who get away with murder/chaos/mayhem/destruction, while hers are angels. But she always buys our kids a gift for special occasions and sends them down to us. And she sent me a text after the mc asking how I was and saying she was thinknig of me lots. That's nice. But... I have low motivation for going but by the same token I think we should make the effort.

Especially considering we have splashed out on a holiday to Sea World like two weeks after the naming day.

Oh DH has just told me there is an option 4.

Option 4: drive (as per #2) and camp in their backyard

Those of you who have met me IRL will know I'm not really a camper. Me and the outdoors... not so great. ZF had to buy my kids camp chairs for crying out loud!

That would keep the cost down. But it would also keep the sleep quota waaaaaay down. I think it would be hell.

What would you do???

[diva det]

if i was in your position i would drive but at night when the kiddies are asleep
find accom close by at a big4 or caravan park in a cabin and stay one night and outta there!!!
i am not a camper as well so definately not an option lol

[Emma09]

I would take option 1 or not go at all!
Option 1- could you not drive to the airport and leave your car in long term parking?
Could your SIL or BIL loan a car to you?
Could they pick you up from the airport?

Ps are your inlaws going?

[~ Zarava Flutterby ~]

I agree with *det* drive up and stay a night in a big 4 (or similar).

at the camp chairs, it was my pleasure and more a bargain than a 'you couldn't do it'

Personally I would camp but I live camping and so do my girls


Sent from my iPhone, more than likely while I should be doing something else!

[Miss.September]

Could you travel with your IL's? I know you've said they're great with the kids, maybe another couple of people as a distraction would help?

I'd probably feel like I should go and I'd drive it. But in saying that DD is a very good traveller so I don't know how I'd feel if she wasn't. When we do our long trips, we leave very early in the morning (like 4.30) so even if she does wake with the excitement, she falls asleep quick enough once we're travelling. Then we stop somewhere for breakfast and again for lunch. Would that be an option?

Or option 5? DH flies up for the day?

[OceanPrincess]

Yep the IL's will be there. They get to stay at SIL's house. Not room enough for all of us.

Em tbh the getting to airport part is the easy part - my parents/sister are frequent airport shuttlers.

It's the other end - SIL and BIL only have one car. And no, wouldn't pick us up.

[OceanPrincess]

Lol I like option 5

The ILs will already be there, they are travelling up earlier (pfft, retirees!!). They will be great once we are there, it's just the getting there.

Maybe we do try the morning drive... My concern is DD would not go back to sleep!

[Catastrophic]

I'd drive up :-)

[feeb]

I say drive up and have a fun adventure!!!

[*Ang*]

Yes I would go and would most probably drive. Is there a reason why you can't leave earlier ie a day or two? Just thinking that maybe an extra night there would be good for the kiddies (and you!) as you don't feel as rushed getting down there, staying for the night and then turning around and coming straight back?

Actually the more I think about it I would leave so that you have at least a couple of nights there. And it would be good for the kids to see their cousins.

[Ginger]

it's a long drive.
we just drove down from nowra area (below Wollongong) to melbourne. it was one of those super hot days in early january too. took us a good 10 hours once you factor in all the toilet breaks etc. and you are totally exhausted by the end of it.
i would start looking at car hire/baby seat hire options if i were you.

[OceanPrincess]

I say drive up and have a fun adventure!!!

Ok then I need some ideas for making it a fun adventure!!

[OceanPrincess]

Yes I would go and would most probably drive. Is there a reason why you can't leave earlier ie a day or two? Just thinking that maybe an extra night there would be good for the kiddies (and you!) as you don't feel as rushed getting down there, staying for the night and then turning around and coming straight back?

Actually the more I think about it I would leave so that you have at least a couple of nights there. And it would be good for the kids to see their cousins.

DH and I both have work Thurs and Mon, so Fri - Sun is really the best we can do.

But I agree about the cousins - DD adores her two little cousins, I think she'd love it. Hmm

[Nai]

I'd drive Friday night, stop halfway in a motel, then go the rest in the morning. Stay overnight up the in a cheap motel and do a day trip back with lots of stops.

[OceanPrincess]

it's a long drive.
we just drove down from nowra area (below Wollongong) to melbourne. it was one of those super hot days in early january too. took us a good 10 hours once you factor in all the toilet breaks etc. and you are totally exhausted by the end of it.
i would start looking at car hire/baby seat hire options if i were you.

(darn lack of multi-quote on tapatalk!)

That's what I'm worried about - that it'll take hours and we'll be completely wrecked before we even get there.

Maybe FIL could drive up and get us from Sydney. I don't think they could take car seats up for us but possibly we could take car seats on the plane...

Might need to google cheap accommodation ideas...

[Tegam]

Sounds really like you don't want to go. But to be honest family is family and if you don't travel you won't see them. I live interstate from my in laws and it's amazing how people think that even of the kids are good travellers then it's easy?? Really. It is always lovely to see people in their own place too and I believe it's better for cousins the spend time at each others houses.

I'd make the effort.

I'm also really glad she asked how you were going after the m/c.

Also I'd find it really hard to have someone say no to my invite and them then go on a holiday interstate anyway.

[peanutter]

peanutter says no.

peanutter says send a really nice present with a card you've put lots of thought into (as even a $50-100 gift and spending an hour or two planning out and handwriting writing a card with special meaning and appropriate verses etc etc is a crapload less cost and time than attending).

peanutter is sufficiently serious about this that she's talking in the third person.


[[ETA: the only time we ever did anything like this was when we were fostering, and we flew up and back from Brisbane for a christening - and we ONLY went because we are the godparents ... the cost and time involved was appreciated by the family, but there's no way we would have gone with the kids, and as we couldn't find anyone to mind them overnight we had to do the whole thing in a day ... maybe that's option 6, but I don't recommend it...]]

[OceanPrincess]

Also I'd find it really hard to have someone say no to my invite and them then go on a holiday interstate anyway.

Yeah that's bugging me too. Feeling a tad bad about that.

I'm googling accommodation.