I was wondering if you had any advice/tips on how to help bub build an attachment to a 'special' soft toy or blanket? My DD is nearly 6mo and i would like her to have some sort of attachment object for a sense of security when i'm not able to be there for her (eg: childcare/being babysat) as I'm due to start back at work soon. I understand that such objects can help babies to feel some sense of safety in an unfamilar enviornment/circumstance. I have tried to introduce things to her that i think she may find comforting but she is still very indifferent to them.... Maybe shes a bit young yet to 'get' the concept? What sort of comforters does your bub have?
I don't think it's something you can really build. If it happens it is because they choose something not because you have made them choose something. DS2 has a wonderful expensive teddy and loves a $5 stuffed Lion he was given when we checked into a hotel once.
I'm not sure that security objects are a good idea anyway - if they get lost it is a tragedy especially if you don't have a spare. I cut DS1's blanky up so that I had spares.
We bought DS a special bunny soft toy that retains our scent. It was the best thing we did! He falls asleep as soon as he has it and it soothes him immediately at daycare. It's from a business called The Snuggle Factory. I found them on FB.
Agree with Onyx - it is really hard to build something like that as they tend to form attachments to the weirdest things at times! DS has had a teddy since he was around 1 - he chose it and we replaced the original one with one that we have been able to replace regularly at Toys R Us as it's one of their branded teddies. DD has her puppy that she's had since birth but she also rotates through various things depending on her mood and she's nearly 5. I don't think you need to consciously try and build that security as you will find as he gets older he will probably choose his own things - having said that, some kids don't have any! Just depends on the child.
We basically gave DS a snuggle blanket and put it in his cot with him every sleep, day or night. Eventually he formed an attachment to it and we now have three of them, JIC!
DS has loads of soft toys. Until the last month he showed zero interest in any of them. We've gone through a major upheaval (moved out of our rental, renovating the new place and staying at SIL in the meantime) everyone is mega stressed and DS is picking up on it. Suddenly he's really attatched to "Bunny" and "Bear". I think some kids only form the attachment if they need that extra comfort and familiarity.
Neither of my kids have had a particular toy until relatively recently - maybe the last 12 months or so.
I also agree with Onyx. If there is a particular toy that the child MUST have to feel secure that can cause all sorts of problems if its lost, forgotten, in the wash etc
I think it's something psychological, many kids just don't need added security. My son has 1 Teddy bear we gave him for his 1st birthday. I have strictly made sure no one gives my kids any bears. When he was 16 months old he was burned and spent time in hospital, he had his Teddy with him at all times.
Despite all this, he loves his Teddy enough but doesn't need him for security. He was more attached to his dummy and even gave that up readily when the time came. I take it positively that he doesn't need the extra security, I'm glad he has his own confidence or whatever.
So I don't think you can artificially create a comfort item. If your child needs extra comfort when you return to work, I'm sure it will happen on its own.
I bought a bunny for my DD that was small enough for her to grip in one hand, with silky ears to stroke (taggie style). It was also small enough to not block her breathing at all. I kept it with me in my bra and slept with it for a couple of days. I introduced it during breast feeds and she pretty much took to it straight away. Then I went back to the shop straight away and bought a spare, and we rotated them through.
DD1 picked her own at about eight weeks old. Would go bonkers kicking her legs and generally be beside herself with excitement whenever I wrapped her in a particular fluffy blanket. She still has it, still goes to sleep with it every night and she's nearly 5.
DD2 on the other hand, has resisted all attempts to introduce her to blankets (I thought it would be easy) or teddies.
I agree that you can't force it but if bubba is going to be left in an unfamiliar place anything that smells like mummy and daddy should be ok. Until DS formed his own attachment (a few weeks ago lol) to two stuffed toys we just carried a minkie blanket that my mum made him that was in his cot or pram unless it was getting washed.
maybe i was a lucky one but at 6 weeks i put a soft toy in the cot with DD and within no time she wouldnt sleep without it. She still has to have it to go to bed or whenever shes tired, upset, out of her comfort zone. she has added to it a blankie which she must also have, but the toy still stands strong. I just put it in the cot and left it there so whenever she was put down it was there and in time, she started to take it out with her after her sleeps, cart it around with her and ask for it if she felt she needed it.
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how to form attachment?
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