thread: Need advice re- explaining death to 6 year old

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Nov 2007
    Tasmania
    759

    Need advice re- explaining death to 6 year old

    I have been just watching disney's Tangled with my 6 yo dd, she turned to me and said, "I wish I was never born," when I asked her about the comment she said " I don't want to die, and I have to die, don't I mum?" I explained to her that dying is not something that is likely to happen for a long, long, long, long time she then said " but you will die mum, and I don't want to stop seeing your beautiful face" I explained that " no I don't intend to die for a very long time either"
    I find this a very challenging area personally and I really don't want to say the wrong thing, but dd is a very deep thinker and this is not the first time this subject has been raised by her recently.
    I don't want to lie and say that we won't die, because it happens in life.
    Just wondered how others have dealt with this topic?, should I get her help from a counsellor or other professional?
    What are people's thoughts?

  2. #2
    Registered User

    Nov 2011
    SE Melbourne
    2,975

    There is a great children's book called lifetimes. Explains the concept of everything having a lifetime-animals etc - I use it when discussing death with chchildren. I'm on my phone so a bit hard to check for the author. But if you can't find it pm me and I'll will try and find a link for you The library may also have it.

    your responses will be most important - Sounds like you are doing good. But if she seems distressed and is dwelling too much then a counsellor may be helpful. Or you could chat to one yourself for some tips on how to handle it.

    Im sure with a mum so keen to get it right things will fall into place. Kinda worrying for you having her ask such deep questions, I bet.

  3. #3
    Registered User

    Jan 2006
    8,369

    You can go with the Circle of Life concept from Lion King if you like.

    I've always talked about death to Liebling, usually when someone we know has died but also when we see a cemetary or a hearse or something like that. He doesn't seem bothered by it and is happy to tell me he wants to "die" me when he doesn't get his own way. Bless. His concept is that you die then a superhero rescues you and you don't die. Or that you die then are buried then become a zombie. He's cool with either of those options.

    I would also talk about any spiritual or religious beliefs you have about a spirit or an afterlife. That can make things easier for young people too.