Just looking for urgent advice about how to tell a big brother his baby brother has passed away before birth? My sister has just found out her baby has passed away and will be induced shortly.
I would go about with something like this...Your little brother is sick and the angels need to take care of him in heaven. He will be watching over us with the angels in the sky.
My sister died when I was five. She was almost two.
My mum and dad were honest with us and said she was sick and she died from being sick. We are Christian so she told us our sister was with God in a beautiful place where she wouldn't be sick anymore and we would see her again one day.
I think the important thing is to be honest and open and prepared to answer questions. It's also important to stress it won't happen to them.
I'd second what n2l said. An average 6yo has quite a good understanding and grasp on life and death. I would personally try and involve him in some funeral/memorial planning as it will likely help him to feel a better connection to his brother and realize it is a time to say goodbyes.
Honestly. The baby became sick and has died. It's no-one's fault. Everyone is very sad that the baby cannot come home. Mummy and Daddy are going into hospital so the baby can be born but the baby won't be able to come home.
it can help if siblings can meet their baby brother or sister after birth. They can see that the baby is real but isn't alive. It's a decision the parents can make after the baby is born.
i'm so sorry for their loss. It's incredibly sad and traumatic. They may be interested in having photos, as they will be one of the few momentos of their baby. Heartfelt offer their service for free. They can take photos of the whole family together.
Last edited by LionsandBears; October 25th, 2012 at 01:55 PM.
Close friends of ours had a late term stillbirth (it was from a known defect and they were prepared) and after the birth they used photos of the baby to get a 'real baby doll' made as a memorial of sorts so the other children could have something visual to remember their brother by. It's obviously not going to be for everyone but maybe something they would want to look into?
I agree to be honest, but it also depends on the maturity of the child.. You don't want the child to think he's going to die if he becomes sick.. I am so sorry to hear of your family's loss. My thoughts are with you
So hard to know what to do or say in these situations. When I was 7 my favourite grandpa died, my parents were honest and told us he had gotten sick and died. I was sad, took time to process it, but it helped to know the truth (he died from a fast growing cancer)
Mildez- sorry that your sis now walks the path of a bereaved mum, I wouldn't wish it on anyone, it's such a demanding journey of such pain and at times wonderous beauty... I am sure she found a way to tell her older son.
I am sorry that you're also grieving the death of your nephew.
How are you going with supporting your sister? It's hard huh? Even after all my experiences, I still feel at a loss sometimes at how best to support an angel mumma.
I know you'll do a good job, today and every day that your sis and nephew need you.
Have had to do this twice. My advice is to be honest. Children really appreciate honesty and cope so much better than adults. I find it is better to be as open about a loss as it is as you would a happy event.
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How to tell a 6yr old brother has passed?
Sorry you have to ask this question.
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