Separation anxiety from a baby

[Mum2SweetCs]

Hi all

Need some advice and help here. Since dd2 was a baby she did not want to go to anyone and would cry as soon as she did or if i was not in the room.

Initially we thought it was because she was breastfeeding quite often.

She is now neaely 5 months and suffers the same. She kinda has a routine and is exclusively bf.

When i leave the house she would cry and vomit like a nut.

This happens to everyone who looks after her including my husband.

She is ok once i am back and it seems like nothing happened ie she is happy and bouncy again.

The thing is i can leave her playing on her playmat and do house chores nd all and she is fine its just as aoon as i leave the house.

This is wven qhen she is already fed and is ready for play time.

I dont know what to do as my mum will need to look after her when i go back to work and i would like to be able to quickly pop out to get some groceries without having to bring her out eap when its pouring.

Advice please thanks :$

[BellyBelly]

I'll write more later but my first daughter was like this - very anxious bub and its part of her personality now. I was also a very anxious mum back then too. How are you doing?

[BellyBelly]

Whoops pressed send too soon. Also there is the relationships wonder week around 5 months, 22.5-26.5 weeks from memory (26 being the WW but the rest is fussy time), during which separation anxiety is normal, they work out they are a small part of a big world.

[onthefly]

It is a normal time for a peak in anxiety, I think. When do you go back to work?

[Mum2SweetCs]

Shes been like this since birth. I keep reading that babies dont get this until
8 months or something but not with her.

I dont have any anxiety issues but i do have DMER.

Back to work in Aug but finding it hard to get her use to anyone else

Even when im in the room and someone carries her like my mum and she sees their face she would cry but shes ok playing on the floor as long as im present in the room.

My body odour aint that strong is it?

[onthefly]

LOL! Surely not. My DD was like this, also. She's taken a while to move out of it. It did get worse at certain times, though, 5-6 months, 14-18 months, for eg.
So you've got 7 months or so? Maybe leave it for a few months and see how you're going then?

[HotI]

Both mine have been like this, but grown out of it over time. I just kinda went with it and didn't get away from them until they were ready. Got to leave DS for the first time with my Mum last week and it was lovely cos i got a break, and he was great for Mum. If i had pushed it earlier, it would have been hell for all of us.

I reckon work will work itself out, or you can worry about that closer to your return. Does she sleep for long during the day, can you sneak out then? Alternatively, i just got used to wearing bub so i could do those run around things. Tried to think of it as multitasking, and doing a workout at same time.

I would also sit near Mum and others with baby on my lap, so they could start to get comfortable with them while still feeling safe having contact with me.

hth

[Barb Glare]

Hi,

She sounds like a normal one to me. it’s a long time until august - things will change so much between nor and then. Hold her close while she is young. It probably won’t help to “get her used to it” by leaving her. Create a secure base for her and from there she will be able to move on at her own pace. In time these velcroe babies become confident children and adults. (My 15 yr old velcroe baby is excitedly planning 6 mnths in Japan this year.) A baby sling may help you get out to the shops and do a few things around the house. It is an intense time - but you are responding to her needs. Your way of parenting hasn’t “made her like this” It’s not to do with the fact that you are breastfeeding her (and stopping breastfeeding won’t help!)You are doing an amazing job.

[BellyBelly]

Great post Barb, totally agree.