thread: When do you stop giving gifts?

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Oct 2006
    Adelaide, SA
    3,962

    When do you stop giving gifts?

    Apologies if I have posted this in the incorrect area, I thought this may be the best place for my question

    I was wondering when you have, or plan to, stop giving gifts to your nieces and nephews for their birthdays or christmas? Or are you planning on giving them gifts for their whole lives?

    My nieces and nephews range in age from 12 to 17. I'm wondering if there's a right time to say, ok, you're a young adult now, no more presents. I'd feel bad doing that, but I'm not sure I want to keep giving them gifts for the rest of their lives either, there are 7 of them, and as you can imagine, the cost of 14 presents each year adds up!

    Obviously special birthdays such as 18th's 21st's etc are a completely different story.

    Would love to hear other's opinions on this!

  2. #2
    Registered User

    Jun 2005
    Perth
    1,454

    DH has 2 first cousins who are aged 21 and 23. We stopped giving them Christmas presents 2 years ago after much debate with my SIL. Birthdays are now only token IF we are invited to celebrate it - eg coffee and cake at their parents. If we are not invited then they don't get a present.

  3. #3
    Registered User

    Feb 2010
    on a big patch of paradise.
    3,720

    I only have one Neice and one nephew so that wont be an issue for me. I do have 8 cousins though and I am a lot older then them all so I have been buying them Christmas presents and I buy them a birthday present if they are having a party. I have also said that once they are 18 then I am stopping with the Christmas presents, which is 4 of them now. With family and friends all having kids now I have to balance out my growing list of gift buying and this is how it has worked for me.

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Dec 2010
    The zoo
    735

    When I was a kid it just died a mysterious death sometime around the age of 18-20. I think it either gets to the point where they become and adult earning their own money and they reciprocate and it continues or it stops.

    When it's everyone getting together and there is a bunch of teenagers around the 12-17 mark in your case it may be tricky though because if you cut it out at a certain age then the older ones would be sitting there with nothing while watching the younger ones open their presents. So I would say either wait until the youngest of that group reaches a certain age or another option is to introduce a secret santa/kris kringle kind of thing for extended family?

  5. #5
    Registered User

    Oct 2006
    Adelaide, SA
    3,962

    I like the idea of waiting until the youngest reaches a certain age, perhaps 18.

    I also like the kris kringle idea but not sure if my family would go for it.

  6. #6
    Registered User

    Jan 2010
    1,975

    My nieces are 13 and 14, my nephews are 4 and a few months. I intend to keep buying them presents indefinitely. Certainly until they are independent adults. My brother and sister get a small birthday present but we only buy for the kids at christmas, this is by mutual agreement.

    ETA For christmas could you suggest a family KK? So, if you have 3 kids you pick three names out of a hat and buy three gifts, if you have two kids you pick two names etc. Seven is an awful lot to buy for christmas, although I would still buy them each a birthday present.

  7. #7

    Mar 2004
    Sparta
    12,662

    I have no intention of stopping giving them gifts. Giving gifts is awesome fun.
    My Aunts still send a few things my way and I send things their way when it seems appropriate. My Aunt is called Flora and Gucci has a newish scent called Flora so there is no way that I could go through duty free and not pick up a small bottle for her.

  8. #8
    Registered User

    Mar 2006
    7,046

    When do you stop giving gifts?

    In my family it stopped at 18 with a present for significant birthdays only after that.

  9. #9
    Registered User

    May 2010
    Land of Dreams
    1,201

    My sister hasn't given my kids gifts past their 1st birthday!! Eldest will be 7 this year!

    I stopped when they were about 5 (for her kids). They are now 16, 13 and 11

  10. #10
    Registered User
    Add leckert on Facebook Follow leckert On Twitter

    Mar 2008
    still on the teaching contract roundabout
    1,952

    When do you stop giving gifts?

    Godchildren we stop at 13 for presents. Haven't had the issue yet with nieces and nephews; will probably be around the same timeframe although they may get to 18 before we stop

  11. #11
    BellyBelly Member

    Jan 2010
    2,793

    When I was growing up we stopped getting gifts somewhere around 16-18. That being said, I have one Aunty who always gave a 'token' gift (ornament, chocolates, small stationary item...). I really appreciated that. I think I will do the same when my nieces and nephews get to around the same age until they stop attending family Christmas gatherings.

  12. #12
    Registered User

    Sep 2008
    Gold Coast
    1,153

    I think you whittle it down
    Start with candles/photo frames and move down the line to chocolate to eventually scratchies in a card.

    Thats how it seems to work for us

    By the time they are 18, they understand its the thought that counts.

  13. #13
    Registered User

    Mar 2006
    4,542

    Ours stopped on our 18th birthday. We all knew that and buy that age we understand & didn't mind.

  14. #14
    Registered User

    Aug 2010
    Albs, WA
    971

    Id probably stop at 18, since they are now 'grown up"
    we only get pressies for the kids in our family

  15. #15

    For me it is when they turn 18. That also includes friends children who I buy presents for. One of my nephews turns 18 this year, and my friends son turns 18 next year, with my other nephew 18 after that. So from here on in present buying will get a bit lighter until they have children themselves LOL.