One of my darling girlfriends has a 3 year old DD who is really terrified of dogs including mine and I am looking for any advice on how we can help her. They are over in our house quite a bit and I have to tie my dog up each time she comes over. I am not that keen on doing that as he hasn't done anything wrong and once he has said his hello will basically leave everyone alone and lie down but have been doing so as it is so stressful for her. My girlfriend is due her 3rd baby in July so she will have a 3.5 year old, a 1 year and a new baby so I want (and so does my girlfriend) to be able to help her out as much as possible by having her DD over when the baby arrives. But if she continues to be so frightened its going to be really hard.
She apppears to be frightened of dogs in general and will cry out if one is nearby when we are out. My dog has never done anything to her and will admit that he has never done anything to her but she is just frightened. We (my girlfriend and I) don't believe any dog has ever done anything to her.
We've spoken to her about whether Jonah (my dog) has ever done anything to her, her Mummy, her Daddy, me my DS etc etc and she acknowledges each time that he hasn't. we've got her to be brave and holding my hand walk nearby him but haven't been able to break through the actual fear.
Does anyone have any strategies for how we deal with this?
My DD is also scared of dogs especially ours and even though he is in a separate part of the yard that is fenced off to her play area she will not go outside to play. Managed to get her outside for 2mins the other day then our dog whimpered (he rarely ever barks) and she started screaming. It's a tough one because its hard to force something someone (especially a child) is fearful of. I'm terrified of spiders and would hate to be pushed into being near them :/ anyway interested to hear the tips people have.
I really believe that they can grow out of the fear in their own time, without being forced into it. Both of my kids were terrified of dogs, to the point that they would scream, cry and run up to us to hold them if one even looked at them from far away. They were literally terrified. Over the years we have just had to reiterate that it's ok that we wouldn't let them get hurt particularly by a friends dog that they see regularly and they are slowly growing out of it. They will willingly go up to friendly dogs to pat them now if they are little.
I know your dog hasn't done anything wrong but I would be prepared to either tie him up, have him outside if they are inside or else have a separated area if she is going to be around regularly. Forcing them to pat etc. doesn't work and I know for us we don't want them to be over friendly with dogs they are unfamiliar with anyway so are happy for them to always be cautious about dogs. I think your dog will be fine in his/her own space whereas if your friends DD is forced to be near a dog that frightens her it could make it even worse, even if nothing bad happens ITMS. It will simply take time (My kids are now nearly 6 and 4 1/2 and have both been frightened since they were about 2, even though even my parents had a dog)
My dd went through this despite growing up with a dog. She was never scared of our dog but would gp to pieces near any others. It was a long, slow process to help her get over it. We started by letting her see her siblings gently interact with small, old dogs who were held firmly in their owners arms. From there we went to staffies like our dog as she felt safer around them. Then onto other dogs. Every interaction was controlled, brief, a d with lots of positive encouragement. If she wouldn't pat the dog then her siblings and I still did to demonstrate that there was no reason to fear. She still doesn't love dogs, especially very large ones, but she no longer runs screaming which is a huge improvement.
Major fear of dogs
Reply With Quote
Bookmarks