thread: Question about dummies & sleep

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Nov 2011
    Perth
    1,090

    Question about dummies & sleep

    DS (7 months) has had a dummy since birth, initially it was just given as a soother while he was in NICU, but gradually he has become quite dependant on it to the point of wanting it 24/7. I don't want him to be dependant on it so have been hiding it during the day, and only offering it when he cannot be settled and for sleep.

    He cannot sleep without it. I've tried the suggestion from 'The No Cry Sleep Solution', however that didn't work. Once he's asleep take it out but when the sleep cycle ends he is unable to settle himself into another cycle. My thoughts at the moment are to continue sleeping with the dummy until he is a bit older (perhaps a year old) and wean him off it then... What do you think/suggest?

    Do I wean him, or go cold turkey? Wait, or now? He's a pretty bad sleeper already, and I'm in two minds... If his sleep improves with the dummy then we will have to later deal with the removal of it; or suffer through it now. Help!

  2. #2
    Registered User

    Jan 2011
    Perth
    3,268

    Question about dummies & sleep

    Whatever makes it easier for you Lady Neon! Don't worry about using the dummy at sleep times if it gives you a bit of peace and helps to settle your little one more easily. Also I know that lots of young babies find it hard to transition between sleep cycles anyway- babies who don't use dummies, babies who do use dummies- it's a learned, often developmental thing for young babies that comes with time.

  3. #3
    Registered User

    Nov 2008
    Perth
    3,686

    Question about dummies & sleep

    I agree, do whatever makes your life easier! DD1 had a dummy from a young age and self weaned around 2-2.5 yrs. She only used it for sleeps or if she was extremely unsettled.

    DD2 (16 months) has had one since day 2 as I learnt early they are great for settling babies and can help save your nipples if, like DD2, your baby has a really strong suck! She still uses her dummy for sleep but rarely any other time. She usually throws it if you offer it to her in the pram or car, she seems to associate it with her cot only now.

    I know some kids have trouble weaning but many don't and just do it on their own. If you're going to wean your child before they're ready then my advice is to wait until they're old enough to understand. You can explain what's happening and maybe exchange the dummy for a new toy or leave it for Santa, etc.

    Babies naturally suck and take comfort from doing so which is why dummies often work so well. They eventually work out how to retrieve them themselves too which can be a godsend if you can wait it out to then. And as for resettling, like LadyLove said, babies can struggle with this with or without dummies, their sleep cycles are only 45 minutes initially and they learn to resettle into another sleep cycle with time, they all do it at different stages regardless of sleep aids and comforters.

    So do what's right for you, the option that'll give you both the most rest and least stress. Good luck!

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Nov 2011
    Perth
    1,090

    Thanks ladies, that makes me feel better!

  5. #5
    Registered User

    Jul 2009
    Riding it out...
    4,959

    I say if it makes it easier for you and him, then leave it! I would have loved for DS3 to have taken a dummy but we tried every brand we could find and he refused them all. You don't see many teens with dummies so he'll let it go when he's ready Sleep is so precious so however you can get it, do it

  6. #6
    BellyBelly Member

    Jan 2010
    2,793

    I was worried about the whole dummy thing with DD1, but eventually I decided 'why mess around with what works?'. She also wanted it during the day all the time and around 18 months we made it for sleep only. She still uses it for sleep. I think we are at the point that we will wait til she's old enough to understand the concept of a a dummy fairy (or similar) to give it to. She's always been such a good sleeper that I haven't wanted to mess with it.
    DD2 won't take a dummy

  7. #7
    Registered User

    Sep 2011
    163

    Lady_neon - Don't try to fix it if it ain't broken! If the dummy helps him then go with it. DD had a dummy from birth (she sucked air for an hour after feeding right after she was born), and I got all stressed about her having it. If she ever fell over it would take a hug from mummy and her dummy to calm her down. She used to sleep with one dummy in her mouth and another dummy to hold onto. She never had another comfort item like a teddy or blanket so I just left her with it. I used to just put 2 or 3 dummies in her cot and soon enough she was old enough to search around and find it herself. When she got to around 18 months I started to stress about getting rid of it. I tried several times from 2 years old onwards, with much distress on her behalf, to get rid of the dummies, she knew that when her dummy got taken away that she'd get a big girl present but I decided that she is my daughter, if that is what kept her happy then why take it away. I spoke to my GP about it and he looked at her teeth and said he couldn't see any issue with them as a result of the dummy and he said just leave her with it. I realised that it wasn't really me who had an issue with it because I knew the comfort it gave her, I was more worried about what people thought when they saw her with it. I soon stopped worrying and just went with the flow. I didn't let her just have it all day but if she hurt herself, or was having a sleep she had her "dotty".. At 3 1/2 years I decided to give it another try to get rid of them and so we went camping for the easter weekend and the first night she was just exhausted and when she got in bed and asked for her dotty i told her i'd left them at home, she said ok, rolled over and went to sleep. The second night I told her that the easter bunny had gotten them from home and left her some easter eggs. She asked me about 3 more times over the next few days but she was fine, very few tears and I knew then that it was the right time and she was ready for me to take them away. Don't stress and do what you feel is best, if that is a dummy then go for it. I have already purchased my stash of "dotty's" for my BUB#2 due in July and will be using one if that is what is needed.