thread: Juggling Everything As A Single Parent

  1. #1
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    Apr 2007
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    Juggling Everything As A Single Parent

    I have 86% custody of our children and they generally stay with me six nights out of seven.

    DD1 is in school and DD2 is in childcare two days a week.

    I'm studying a Masters which is meant to be at least 15 hours study per unit per week.

    Last semester I was getting very frustrated with myself because I could not seem to keep on top of the housework as well as study and the house was a tip.

    I've just done a blitz in the semester break and changed some rooms around and am hopeful this will make a big difference.

    However, I'd like to be able to supplement my welfare payments with some freelance writing from home. I've written in the corporate world for 20 years so this is not unrealistic.

    But I don't see how I can actually fit this in unless I put DD2 in childcare for an extra day so three days a week in total.

    I'm feeling guilty at the prospect. I know it will make my life easier and will mean when she's home I will be more attentive, less stressed and play with her more instead of trying to stupid amounts of housework but ...

    I'm justifying it on the basis that three days means one day for housework/meal planning/grocery shopping/bulk cooking; one day for study and one day for freelancing.

    Arrrrgh, the guilt.

    How does everyone else juggle?

  2. #2
    Senior Moderator

    Nov 2004
    Chickens.
    4,989

    I work full time. I have always done so. Been a single parent since the boys were 3 and 1. It's been hard

    Mine have always been in day care most of the time. Otherwise I couldn't work.

    When I wasn't single, I found three days a week was ideal for work.

  3. #3
    ♥ BellyBelly's Creator ♥
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    Feb 2003
    Melbourne, Victoria, Australia, Australia
    8,982

    I spent a fair few years running BB as a single parent (and the rest, feeling like one until now). Childcare is so important. I didnt have it a great deal, but wish I did a bit more as I felt worse living in a bomb of a place most of the time because I had to work hard - my income was it for the most part - no child support was being paid. Some months it actually cost me to run my business and I became quite nervous!

    I felt so guilty being a stresshead in a messy house and no help.

    One thing I highly recommend is a regular cleaner - weekly or fortnightly. $50-75 for two to three hours (I figure my time is worth more than that!) and your house is sparkling. Bathroom, kitchen, floors. Such huge therapy for me I found mine through Gumtree and they were awesome.
    Last edited by BellyBelly; July 5th, 2013 at 01:13 PM.
    Kelly xx

    Creator of BellyBelly.com.au, doula, writer and mother of three amazing children
    Author of Want To Be A Doula? Everything You Need To Know
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  4. #4
    Registered User

    Oct 2006
    Adelaide, SA
    3,962

    I think your idea of one day for each "job" is fantastic.

    Don't feel guilty, you're doing it with your children's best interests at heart as well as your own

  5. #5
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    Thanks guys - you've all made me feel much better. I guess at the moment it's chicken and the egg. I don't feel justified in putting her into childcare if I'm not actually freelancing and I won't be able to freelance unless I put her in childcare. Same with spending money on a cleaner to free up time - at the moment, I don't feel I can justify it because I'm not freelancing or earning any money. Gahhhhhhh!

    But I think I will bite the bullet.