Ever only wanted 2 children... but went for a 3rd anyhow?

[PinkPalace]

DH and i have decided to stop at 2 children.
FOr financial reasons mostly.. ie not needing a bigger car, house and manage with 1 each to control

But i know DH would love more.... we always wanted children close - not big gaps between and i am wondering? Anyone decide on 2 but went for 3 or 4 anyhow?

How did i work out
Are you happy you did?

[melham74]

Mel.....You will manage. Hey Hey if I can go for another you can to....as they get older it is great they always have each other like DS2 and DS1 reason why DS3 needs a playmate.........I really dont find having another costs that much more TBH. Yes a bigger car but not in everyday expense iykim.

[Lisa]

I had 2 children and I was more than happy with my boy & girl (pigeon pair as many used to call them)

Then my ex and I seperated and we both moved on with our lives.
Then I met the love of my life... and it seemed only natural to want babies with him. So we tried for another. We lost our first baby together at almost 21 weeks (Noah), and then 3 months after losing Noah we found out I was pregnant with Harrison.
He is the best little guy! Everything worked out great for us. He is a really good baby (toddler) which helps too

I am so glad I changed my mind and had more babies. We are now planning another one
The age gap between my older kids and Harrison is 12 & 9 years. There will obviously be a bigger gap between them and the next one... but it doesn't mean anything... they all play like kids still.

I think you shouldn't exclude something you're not 100% on. Who know's how you will feel after having this baby... you might then decide that 2 is definitely your number when it comes to children... but you may decide that you would like 1 or even 4 more! lol
All the best hun

[~Aveta~]

hi there, i had a six-year old stepson when i had my twins. three years and nine months later, almost to the day, i had my younger DD. she will be sixteen in three weeks, and i'm trying for another with my new DF, and she for one is all excited at being a big sister. my sister also did the divorce and remarry and have another child thing, hers are fourteen years apart. i don't know if that helps you at all, sorry! but i do understand your reasons financially and also for "crowd control" of littlies! i found it frustrating to have four underfoot and not enough of me to go round. and most holiday bookings etc are two parents two children. having more children does restrict the kind of car you buy, the size of the house and where you can go when they are all little and need a parent in close attendance. but i know many families where two are close together and then had more years later. i guess what i'm trying to say is it's you guys as a family that will make it work, whether your kids are close in age or not.

[PinkPalace]

thanks girls!
i know it is something i have to come to on our own terms.
BUt it is good to hear others experiences on the matter iykwim.

[~clover~]

I only ever wanted the 'pigeon pair'. When I was little I always wanted to be a mum & wanted 6 kids, but when DD1 came along I just wanted a little boy & I would be done.
Well, my little boy came out a girl! So we decided we'd keep going til we got a boy. Thank god the next one was a boy!!
I honestly would have more in a second if I could go through another pregnancy. I get hyperemesis with girls - severe morning sickness - & with DS I got pelvic problems - seperated pelvis - that still has me in ALOT of pain, so I'm trying to tell myself 3 is enough.
I think it's probably just coz I made the decision not to have anymore is why I want more, but I would really love to have a big family.
I think when mine get a bit older I'll look into being a foster parent.

[mbear]

Dh only wanted one......but 3 little girls later......

I think you and your DH are being very sensible in taking into consideration financial costs as well as space etc. Some people are under the impression babies dont cost a lot of money - maybe - but its when they start to eat like adults, go to school etc that it does get costly.

We just bought a new car (people mover), are currently putting thru plans to extend our current home to council, and Dh has taken up more work (in his 2nd job) which will see him busy full on for the next 12 months.....but thats the choice we made when having 3 children.

Our #3 was a oopsie - a much love oopise - but DH and i were kinda content with just 2 - 2 is manageable, 2 you can do. 3 is not so much harder, theres just more to it - i.e when they all fall asleep in the car on the way home after a late night out b/w you and DH you can only carry 2 children in the house, you have to leave 1 in the car.....that sort of thing.


Maybe see how the birth of your new one goes. Settle into that page of your life and maybe assess the situation in 6 months time......

Good luck.

[Hannahbanana]

I have always wanted 3 and am getting ready to TTC #3 now. I have a DD and DS who are 17mths apart, and am hoping #3 won't be any further than 2 years apart from DS. But I have had thoughts about #4 later on which would mean bigger car. But I'll wait and see what happens after #3.
You never know, you might find that after #2 comes along you aren't quite finished and do want more.
I can imagine missing the baby stage later on down the track and going for the 4th.