thread: How do I stop co-sleeping

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Dec 2005
    Gold Coast
    1,246

    How do I stop co-sleeping

    A few months ago our DD (then 17months) started waking again in the night, around 3am-ish (she only started sleeping through around 12months). As i was about 6 months pregnant at the time and not sleeping myself I resorted to bringing her into our bed.
    During the last few months i've tried putting her back to sleep in her own bed but she just wouldnt have it. she would be sound asleep in my arms and as soon as i put her down she would wake up. Some nights I would spend 2 hours going through the same thing and just end up with her back in our bed.
    As i got fatter and fatter, i physically couldnt keep that up, so as soon as she woke she would come into bed with us, which got earlier and earlier and now seems to be at a constant 11:30.
    I'd really like to get her to sleep in her own cot again, so that we can start to put her in a big bed - which i dont want to do while she's still waking as she'll just get up.
    Any ideas on how to do this the gentle way. Obviously, now that there's a new baby in the house i dont want her to feel like everyone but her is in mummy and daddy's room.
    Cheers

  2. #2
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber & MPM

    Feb 2007
    Melbourne
    5,462

    I'm no expert sorry, but I just wanted to reply to your thread!

    I know you want her to sleep in her cot, but would you consider a big bed or a mattress on the floor so you can lie down with her in her own room? Then if she wakes up at 2:30am you can hop into bed with her which will break the habit of her being in your bed. Hopefully she'll then eventually stop needing you to come in.

    Probably not much help to you! I hope you find something that works soon .

  3. #3
    Registered User
    Add andie82 on Facebook

    Aug 2008
    Springfield Lakes, Queensland
    218

    I wake up some morning and wonder who put my 2yr old in my bed ..
    Its a comfort thing. If my son doesn't come in during the nite he comes in for a cuddle first thing in the morning (which I do love).

    It wld be hard but you cld try basics 101. Just like you wld comfort your newborn you cld try that with your DD.
    She may upset but close the door and walk away. She will settle. Depends on how comfy you are, you can start with one min, then up it to two, then three but don't take it more than five for the first few days.
    Sometimes I use calming music or nursery rhymes for my 11mth old.

    Wish I cld help more. Sorry
    Last edited by andie82; September 10th, 2008 at 08:14 AM.

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Jan 2006
    8,369

    My mum just put a child gate on my bedroom door and left me! NOT recommended! (Especially not in a no-CC forum!) I did feel everyone was having a party in my parents' room and I was left out. (BTW, I have an excellent memory and this is from when I was about 3, so I didn't realise that my sister was up all night in pain from her stomach due to solids started very early, I just knew they were up having fun without me! It's my only memory about this... I seriously only have about 10 memories from pre-school and the "missing out" memory is one of them.)

    In hindsight, my mother has said she should have let me sleep with them for a couple of nights. I'd have been bored of my sister being awake all night and gone to my bed for a sleep!

    Could your DH sleep in your DD's room for a bit to help her settle back in there? He'll probably enjoy the fewer night-time wake-ups from the newborn too.

  5. #5
    rhyb Guest

    I know this is a lot different with my DS being 3 months but I put his bed in my room and once he gets ok with that Im going to move him to his own room. Another thing I did which helped heaps was i put something that smelt like me (eg a tshirt bra) in his cot with him and he drifts right off. Best of luck

    HTH

  6. #6
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Jun 2005
    Blue Mountains
    5,086

    I say put her in a big bed, and let her get herself up in the night and bring herself in to you! Works in this house! I found after a couple of weeks DS slept through all the newborn goings on anyway if he was in our bed, and I say just do whatever gets everyone some sleep

    He now only occasionally comes in during the night, most nights he sleeps through and then comes in early in the morning. But I've always loved that we put him in a bed so I didn't have to go and get him LOL. This way when putting him to bed I've always been able to tell him to have a lovely sleep in his own big bed, but if he wakes up, he can come and find mummy & daddy and climb into our bed. I too, often wake to him in our bed and wonder when he came in!

    Do you have space in your room for her bed? or a mattress for her? Or will her cot fit in your room? That might help the transition a bit?