still won't go in cot and 9 months old

[queenbee]

I choose not to use controlled crying as many months ago I did it and my daughter and I both got stressed. I ended up with sleep deprivation and had to see my doctor. Just don't want to go down that path again.

My daughter had been sleeping on me for her day sleeps up until about 2 months ago but now sleeps in our bed through the day. She has always slept with us at night.

I have tried everything, wrapping, music, patting, getting her used to sitting in cot to play, everything. Nothing works. I am quite happy to let her co-sleep, just wondering whether anyone has experienced the same issues with their 9 month old child? And whether it ever gets better and they just go into their cot eventually?

Thanks for your help

[Arimeh]

I've never actually had this problem cos my kids don't sleep with me (DD did in the beginning to get her to settle when waking up a couple of times a night - but she will now settle in her bassinette).. but is it possible to move the cot next to your bed with the edge of it down so you are still right next to her and can touch her with your arm?

[aussienic]

I to wold suggest moving the cot right next to your bed and see how she goes there..

or maybe move her right into a cot sized toddler bed? not sure how mobile your DD is or anything though

[Girly Girl]

Queenbee you are not alone i have a 10 and a half month old that refuses to sleep in her cot.. everything you have said sounds exactly like what it's like in my house only thing is i have to cuddle my girl in her day sleeps because she is two fidgity to be left alone in our bed. we have moved her cot into our room next to our bed with no luck.
We also co-sleep.

i am just on my way out but i will pop back and post more later i just wanted you to know you are not alone and i would love to swap stories with you

back later

[Curly]

At this point I'd be thinking about not worrying about the cot at all and going straight to a big kids' bed when you are ready (whether toddler-sized or full-size single, up to you).

We moved DS into his big bed at about 19 months and he finally started sleeping through, we were always breastfeeding or rocking to sleep. We wish we'd done it months earlier LOL. He just has a bed rail on both sides of the bed. I think he feels less "enclosed".

Mind you, he doesn't climb out. If he wakes up he just yells out for us until we come and get him. I don't know if this is because he likes the snuggles when we come and get him or because he always slept in a sleeping bag so is used to not being able to climb (although he climbs all over the bed during the day).

I guess it depends on your DD. If you think she will always be climbing out of the bed, this may not be the solution for you!

[queenbee]

Thanks everyone, she gets straight up and starts crawling out of bed! Most of the time she cries but she has almost fallen off the edge! The cot converts to a toddler bed, is it too early do you think?

[queenbee]

GirlyGirl, can you PM me? I can't seem to PM you for some reason, not giving me the options, thanks

[Girly Girl]

Queenbee i'm still not sure on how to PM but i replyed to your message hope you got it.

I was thinking about what Curly said the other day because my little one knows how to get off the bed (she slids off on her tummy) it may work and she is also walking so i can do the "walk her back to bed thing" (i did that with my 6 year old) but she isn't even 12 months old yet my baby is still a baby, i don't want her to grow up too quick, and it's to early for a big girl bed .... isn't it? I thought that when my little girl started walking it was going to be good she'll be so exausted and just be so sparko i'll get her in her cot but nope she still wakes about every 45 minutes if she isn't "with me"...

will be back to post a better post when i can Taylah needs her lunch *hugs* to everyone

[Phteven]

We have a cot that was pretty much never used.
Both my boys went into their big bed without using the cot.
Yasin had a mattress on the floor as a transition and he liked that.

[Jaycee]

My DS is also 9 months and about 2 weeks ago we started having this problem also.
Although, before that he was fine in his cot.
He'll start out in his cot of a night time, he's b'fed to sleep and I carry him to his cot while he's asleep (always done it this way and have never had a problem)
He'll then typically wake around midnight-1am, I'll feed him again and then try to put him back in his cot and he just won't have a bar of it!
I just don't know what to do!
Does anyone have any ideas on why he's doing this or how to get him back into his cot?
Co-sleeping is not really an option for us as DH is a smoker
I've ended up having to sleep on the lounge with him which is really not very comfortable for me and I don't really sleep for fear of him falling off.
So sorry to hi-jack your thread queenbea, I'm just so exhausted from no sleep and don't know what to do!!

[queenbee]

Janine, you poor thing I hope someone can help you soon and someone out there has some ideas. Nothing has worked for me so far. Sorry I can't be of help. Sleeping on the lounge would be uncomfy for you.

[Jaycee]

Thanks queenbea, I'm sorry you haven't found any answers either.
Hopefully this is just a phase that will pass for the both of us!

[queenbee]

hopefully

[Mum0809]

My DS is almost 8 months. I think he has slept his cot about 10 times all up. We took his cot down the another day because I thought there wasn't much point trying to get him into it now. At night he sleep with us. During the day I have started putting him in his own bed. He has a car bed which is very low and has sides (If you type car beds into ebay you can see what I mean).

[Gigi]

we co-slept, me and baby in the big bed, for 12 months. that worked fine. i put pillows at the edge of the bed, so she coudln't roll off the bed. DH slept on the sofa.

at 12 months, we put her in a cot, in our room

a few months after that, we moved her cot into her room, cos she woudln't lie down if she coudl see us

when we put her to bed, there is a ritual
bath, songs, stories, cuddles (all except bath, in dimlight), her in cot with her kangaroo to cuddle, dh then lies on the single bed in her room and sings to her. she goes to sleep that way.

only a few months ago i was tearing my hair out over her sleeping (or lack of it), i can't believe she now sleeps five hours, then booby feed, then another five hours. i'm happy with that.

we were steamrolled into controlled crying (at a PND live-in clinic with bossy medical staff) - NEVER again. they wanted us to wean as well. never going back there. i consider their methods "anti-child". their methods didn't actually get results, all it did was distress my baby and me and put us backwards.

[Jaycee]

Gigi, you poor thing being pressured to cc and wean, how ridiculous is that!
I wish Jake would go 5 hours, booby and 5 hours.
He used to be such a great sleeper, I guess that's why I'm so stressed about it now!

[queenbee]

Gigi, poor you having to deal with those bossy nurses! I don't really like CC, stressed Mum and Bub out way too much. Works for some but definately not for us. I'm wondering whether I should put my DD's mattress on the floor as her toddler bed is a little high (but not as high as an adult bed)

[Gigi]

i think the idea of the "mattress on the floor" is an excellent one for bubs going early into a bed. worth a try anyhoo. i'd put it up against the corner, e.g two walls. who am i kidding? the room for bilby is so tiny, wherever you put the mattress, it would be in a corner LOL.

after such a long time of frequent waking, we are at 23 months in now, i have such bad insomnia. bilby is finally sleeping decently, and I AM NOT. my brain is always expecting her to wake!

about the sleeping on the lounge with your bub thang. I have done that a few times, and i actually found it rather dangerous. Cos if they fall (and we came close a few times), it's quite a drop for baby to fall. If you are half asleep, your reflexes to catch them aren't as sharp. I would be pointing this out to dh. That's the reason my dh slept on the couch. Sorry if that is a bit blunt to say, i'm just thinking of the safety of the baby - cos i know how upset i was, when i fell asleep on the couch, with baby on me, and i woke up JUST in time to catch her (save her from falling to the hard lino/concrete floor). i was mortified. But hope i havne't offended by saying this.