Hi All
Hoping some one has some advice as this is a bit of a worry
The other day my FDC lady told me that DS held his breath when she was trying to get him to sleep, so she had to hold him while he slept. I looked it up and heard about 'blue attacks' and babies holding their breath when they are upset.
DH just dropped me at work and DS got upset in the car. he cried and then held his breath - and started to shut his eyes and kind of drift off... started breathing/crying when DH picked him up.
I am so worried about this - is it something medical? or behavioural? what can we do about it?
I will take him to pead to et it checked out, so scary but any stories or advice welcome PLEASE. DH and I are very worried/upset about it. I am crying at work thinking about it. do you think it is a reaction to me leaving him?
Thanks.
Oh, lovely. I have no advice or tips for you just wanted to give you the biggest possible and I hope you find a resolution to this ASAP. Can you call the paed for advice or even the MHCN?
Pregpan, I'd be getting him checked at the drs just for your peace of mind BUT my mother says my sister used to do this - hold her breath when she was cranky when other children would be having a screaming tanty instead. Apparently it's not a problem because if they ever hold it enough to pass out then the autonomic nervous system takes over and just start breathing again normally. Which would be stressful until you get used to it, I imagine. But if it were me I'd be checking with the dr in the first instance.
Thanks Girls - am so upset about this and poor DH who had to see it this morning.
I have called the paed to get an appt and he cant see me til the new year!!! Will go to the GP when we get back home and have him checked out, though from all i have read it seems to be unlikely it is medical I guess - more behavioural and just something that 'happens'.
So awful to see/deal with though... everything i read seems to indicate that it is common, though have never heard of it with anyone i know...
He nearly did it the other day when DH dropped me at the airport too so of course mother guilt kicks in and i feel like it is when i am 'abandoning' him. Poor DH stopped in the middle of a major road to pick him up this morning when he did it in the car...
HUGE hugs. My brother used to to the exact same thing. One day when he was maybe 3 or 4 and I was 9 or 10 my mum dragged him to me and asked me to do something - he was blue, so I know exactly how scarey it is.
It is definately behavioural and something more for a therapist. I know it sounds silly but a lot of places are teaching kids to self sooth and how to understand their emotions now from a very early age. A therapist is not for everyone so if you can stick it out know that it will pass. While some kids hit themselves in the head when they are angry or excited your child just does something else, it is just their way of coping with their emotions until they find other ways and understand them better.
Ideas to get him to breathe are to blow on his face or pat on the upper back (not swift hard ones they could wind him further.
At the moment it is lose lose, no one can bare to watch a child hold their breathe till they are blue or drowsy but by picking them up they are finding a bad way of getting what they want........... encouraging this behaviour to continue for longer.
When he stops holding his breath take the time to talk with him about whats going on.... I know he is only 13 months old but the sooner you start the sooner he will understand. Try and get him to tell you how he feels (sad, angry etc), ask him why (Is it because mummy is gone??) explain that she iwll be back, and how he can better deal with the situation and I guess you could try rewarding him when
he does whatever it is you asked of him to do when he is feeling that way.
Of course keep it simple, it may seem like a load of bollocks - especially with such a young child but I guess I would give anything a go.
I kind of agree that if it's behavioural, then it's not a behaviour to be rewarded by picking him up... but that's easy for me to say because I'm not looking at my blue child!
I hope it is just a passing phase and he starts kicking and scratching walls for you instead, like my DS does. LOL
I'll be interested to know though what the drs say about it, so keep us posted.
My niece used to hold her breath and faint up until being about 3/4. She first did it at the supermarket when she couldn't get something she wanted. My sister called the ambulance because she was so scared, but after going to the hospital they told her that she had just fainted as she had gotten so upset.
I am afraid my niece worked out this was the ideal way of getting her own way because my sister when she was having a tanty (depending where she was having one) had to be close by to catch her when she fainted and hold her till she came round or give her what she wanted if it could be given.
Eventually she grew out of it but that didn't stop her trying to faint though for a while after to get her own way. She is 9 now and is very demanding. We tried many different ways to avoid her holding her breath without giving her what she wanted all the time but it is very scary when they do it. In the end they get ultimately what they want in either situation your attention.
Sorry I can't tell you how we stopped it. We just had to let it run it's course. Just for your peace of mind as the others have said take him to your GP and see if there is something they can recommend.
Matilda used to breath hold. She started around 18 months and generally it was associated with not getting her own way. At first, the first few times she passed out I freaked out... seriously. I would phone for help and by the time I got someone on the phone, she would come around.
I kept getting told it wouldn't hurt her and to enjoy the silence for a few minutes . I couldn't do that. So I got a water pistol... and I would squirt her just as she started to hold her breath and she would scream.... so I got screaming instead of passing out, but thats what I preferred. Now, further on, we are finding out more about her behaviour and breath holding is explained... its horrible
Thanks for all the responses... I wil def try not to 'reward' him for it as i know it isnot causing him harm and i agree it would be a good idea to talk to him about it after.
Do you guys think it is an indicator of behavioural issues down the track? this is a concern to me - so please let me know insights...
Pregpan, my sister definitely didn't have any behavioural probs as a child and has grown into a balanced, well rounded woman! Just possible a little on the strong-willed side (like all the girls in our family ).
I wouldnt think so. When kids stumble upon something that 'works', they do it again. Be it throwing themselves on the floor, stomping their feet, or holding their breath! We've just gotta try our hardest not to let it work for them. Yours just happened to find something that scared the crap out of you guys and got an almighty reaction, which imo is totally reasonable!
LOL Christy at the water pistol. Great idea! Think Id prefer screaming too.
Reply With Quotepossible and I hope you find a resolution to this ASAP. Can you call the paed for advice or even the MHCN?
BellyBelly Member
'blue' attacks/holding breath - 13 month old
. I couldn't do that. So I got a water pistol... and I would squirt her just as she started to hold her breath and she would scream.... so I got screaming instead of passing out, but thats what I preferred. Now, further on, we are finding out more about her behaviour and breath holding is explained...
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