How do I get him to stay in bed?

[Jaapie]

For the past 2 weeks we have been spending 30-45 mins every night taking him back to bed and it's starting to wear thin!

We don't comment, don't speak, just take his hand and lead him back to his bed. But he just thinks it's a game! I make him climb on to his bed by himself to try and tire him out a bit quicker! Will he get bored with it soon? Any tips we could try? Don't want to shut the door, would rather that he learns he shouldn't come out instead of making him feel powerless.

He's so canny too - we leave his drink on the shelf within reach, he'll bring it out to me in the kitchen and say "I don't need a drink Mummy", then will come out later asking for a drink. Same with the dummy . . . don't want dummy . . . need my dummy. Kinda funny but . . . grrrr!

We go to bed about 2 hours after him, so it's a big chunk of our 'free' time!!

Thanks!

[tannedangel]

Does he come out for a reason everytime?? (I think I know the answer, but im not 100% sure)
I have a book here that I can quickly read and brief it out to you if this is the case.

[Olive]

arrhhhhh the fine art of stalling DD did the same!! i used two bedrails on her bed so she cant get out! will worry about that another day!

[tannedangel]

OK, Im back.
I just read through the chapter of the book, and it seems your doing what it suggests. But Ill just brief over what it says any way.
It says to keep taking him back to bed, the first few times saying something along the lines of "OOPS you got out of Bed, Let Mummy take you back." and nothing more. Try not to engage in any conversation. Also try not to make it seem like a big deal.
Add the dummy/drink/anything else he may use as an excuse to get out of the bed into his bedtime routine, and explain to him that he had a drink before bed, but there is a drink next to his bed for if he wants it, but he doesnt have it, and if he wants his dummy there is one next to his bed if he wants it but he doesnt have to have it.
You could try a teddy or nightlight (if he doesnt have one yet) or something special for him for when he goes to bed, and only when he goes to bed.

It may take a few nights of backwards and forwards, but if you dont make a big deal out of it then it should catch on eventually. I hope that helps a little bit at least.

[Tannis]

I know you don't want him to feel powerless but we have a gate on Jayden's door. I didn't like the idea of shutting his door (he can open it anyway) but he got really bad with getting up and playing (while we were at the other end of the house watching tv and didn't hear him for a while). He also got up in the middle of the night and was in the kitchen so we thought a gate was for his own safety. I was also pregnant and working FT, I couldn't handle getting up and putting him back to bed everynight. The gate is still up but he rarely wakes now.
Jayden used to say he needed to go to the toilet....even though we hadn't started TT'ing yet! So cute with all their excuses but gotta keep a straight face! haha

Good luck!

[Snacks]

I was going to suggest a gate too - that way he's not completely removed from you (i.e. you'll be able to hear if he is distressed) but he can't get out.