Trying to Conceive after Miscarriage or Loss May 2007

Hi everyone,

Welcome Trying. I am sorry for your loss. I wonder if you can get your typo in your name fixed up by the mods? I hope you find the support you need here. I don't know what I would have done since I had my recent m/c (also in March). After mine I had my first AF 29 days later (didn't temp so don't know if I Od) and my next was a 24 day cycle with me Oing on CD13. I'm now into my third cycle since it happened so it will be interesting to see how this one goes.

Bun - thanks for the info re aspirin. I probably wont do that anyway as I'm pretty sure I'd forget to take it anyway. Life is pretty hectic & stressful at the moment and my memory is suffering right now. I hope your follie holds on til you manage to BD.

Las - I believe the idea with green tea is to drink it before Oing. As Salt pointed out you need to watch your folate intake when drinking green tea as something in it can hinder your absorption of folate, so you have to take a folate supplement if you are going to drink it. Seeing that most Chinese people have been drinking green tea for centuries without any obvious increase in abnormalities I don't see that it can be too dangerous in moderation. Maybe the Chinese diet is also high in folate.... who knows. What I read suggested as little as 1/2 a cup of green tea per day can double your chances of conceiving..... that's probably an exaggeration but it sounds pretty good to me so I'm willing to give it a try.

Jenjams - things are sounding promising but I've lost track of where you are in your cycle.... what CD are you at now?

:)

I've had a pretty good day today. Work kept my mind off things. Had the FIL over for dinner tonight so cooking & tidying up distracted me as well. It's my birthday tomorrow so I have a couple of nights of dinner out planned which should be lots of fun..... but first I have to get through the load of work I have to do tomorrow.

Hi TTBP, welcome to the site... I'm pretty new here to and people have been so lovely to me over the past 6 weeks since my D&C. Are you charting on FF? (See my signature for mine).. my temps were wonky last cycle (the one after my D&C). I don't think I O last cycle but my hCG was 45 about 10 days ago so I'm not sure when/if it's hit 0 to compare. I got told it can take a little while for things to go back to normal and not every woman O each month.

Hi everyone, just popping in to say Hi and that I read your posts everyday but don't usually have much to add.

Satya - Sorry to hear about your mum. I hope you have a good day tomorrow though. Maybe just treat yourself to something nice like a massage on you birthday. You deserve it.

Trying to be Positive - Welcome :) And I like your name.

Rachael - Great to see you in here! And all the best for this month.

Jenjams - Congrats! Sounds like a BFP to me. Hoping this one sticks for you.

Sorry to all the lovely ladies I've missed, and hope things are going well for you.

I'm starting to figure out things, like was really chuffed to learn what EWCM means and that I can maybe tell when I'm fertile. Now in the tww and keep seeing (or imagining) pg signs every where. Trying not to get my hopes up, but they're sky high already.

Morning all,

I have added a ticker now trying to be positive :)

Satya, I am on about 15DPO or about CD34. My BFP test yesterday was darker than the previous day. I have been showing them to DP and he said yesterday it was definately darker.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Bekz, I will hopefully be joining you in the PAML after my BT. I know a lot of people have cramps but I am still a little scared.

Spreading the baby dust to all....

http://i208.photobucket.com/albums/b...d/birthday.jpg

Hi ladies, can I join your thread?

Here's my story:

Sadly, I miscarried on Tuesday of this week, 22 May. I was 5 weeks and 5 days. It was our very first month of TTC.

We saw our GP on Monday, was sent for a blood test to confirm and she called me later to tell me my HCG was only 13 when it should be in the 100's. I'm having another BT on Monday to check my HCG again to ensure it gets back down to 0.

I've told my boss my whole sad sorry story and he has given me the rest of the week off work, he is wonderful.

My GP has suggested we leave TTC until AF returns next cycle. I am trying to be positive but feel sad at the same time.

In the space of a week we have experienced incredible highs and incredible lows. DH has been wonderful, this is a shared experience and although bad, has brought us even closer than before.

I guess the good thing is that we know we can get pregnant. It just wans't meant to be this time.

I called my FS also and the nurse also told me to take precautions this month and then have a HyCoSy next cycle, we will also start BT's for ovulation tracking again.

So my question is: I don't think I'll need a D&C, so how long until AF should return? Also, I've read that some GP's and FS's say you can TTC as soon as you finishing miscarrying, yet my directions are to wait until AF returns?

:heartbeat:
shoegal

Hi Shoegal, :hug: sorry to hear of your loss...you have come to the right place...

It is a good sign (IYKWIM) that you bhCG is as low as 13 already, mine is still at 29 and that is 7 weeks after my D&C but in saying that AF came for me yesterday!!

So when AF will come is like guessing how long a piece of string is...it differs so much for everybody...

Yes, there is a lot of differing opinion about when to start TTC again, and whether to wait for AF...my GP says wait for at least one AF as this gives the lining of your uterus a chance to rebuild nicely, and my ObGyn said wait for one AF as when you have just lost, your uterus can be a little 'irritable' and not as sticky.....but in saying that plenty of people have conceived straight away and have had problem free pgs..:D

I guess the usual advice is to get as much advice as you can then make a decision thatis best for you and that you feel comfortable with..

You are welcome to join the Waiting for AF after MC or D&C Club, in the M&L Thread - lots of ladies at the same stage as you...very welcoming and superbly helpful..

Take care of you
Love Alex
xx

Hi girls, sorry I've been out of touch. Just had a quick read - and it's nice to see that mostly everyone is feeling positive!!!!!!!!!

I have been busy getting ready for my wedding this Saturday. We are getting married in our garden, amongst the lavender and roses, and having a nice lunch with a few friends and our children (except our baby boy, very sad). But, I'm sure somehow he will be with us, he certainly has a strong presence in our hearts and how we go on....

I did an OPK this morning and it was pretty faint. Should I just keep doing one every day till they get darker (and then assume I'm about to O). I'm on CD12, so expect to O in the next couple of days. I know, the timing is perfect, and I pray we will have a permanent reminder of our wedding. Also, should we start the BD now? What would you girls do re the timing of it all?

On a sadder note, our baby boy, it seems, contracted pneumonia after birth - most likely from something aspirated, which then turned into pneumonia. I thought he may have had an infection, it's tragic that it was some gunk that went down into his lungs that killed him. Even more tragic is that he could have been saved if he'd been monitored and checked, the doctor and hospital have much to answer for, and we will be pursuing this line till the end.

I'll report back in soon..

Much love,

Lee xo

Hi TTBP
I just wanted to let you know that I have just experienced the same thing as you and had my first af on the 22nd of April and have had blood tests done and I have still not o'd. My ob/Dr reckons this is fine and it may take a couple of cycles to get it's self back in order but if you are concerned as I was I would talk to you doctor and see what they say.
Good luck TTC and Welcome!

Hello,

I'm sorry, I don't really know what to write.

I'm just having trouble understanding why, if what we are all designed to do is have children, is it so difficult to actually have them?!

I can not believe how much 'bad luck' everyone has had and the thought never crossed my mind that it could actually happen to me!

It's only after it happens that you realise it's possible for things to go so badly wrong; I guess that's how we all protect those who do manage to concieve and have a normal pregnancy, keeping the innocence and all that jazz.

Anyway, I've been reading this thread for so long, actually becoming quite accicted to scanning each new entry with the hope of discovering that someone on here has actually fallen pregnant, that I thought I should perhaps make my presence known :)

I suppose I just find it so comforting to know that it does actually happen :)

Sorry for the interruption, but I just wanted to thank you all and wish you luck!

XO

Hi Lovely Ladies,

Shoegal - Welcome and I am sory to hear of your loss. I have had 2 m/cs now. The first being most relevant to your situation. I m/c at 5/6wks and did not have a d and c. I got AF 2wks after the m/c, but it took 3 cycles for everything to go back to normal. My cycles were all over the place, long, short and Oing and not Oing. In saying this I had also just stopped breastfeeding DD and I think this delayed my body going back to normal quickly. Everybody is different and you may just find that your cycles will bounce back, all the best.

Patience - Welcome and sorry for your loss. I am sure you will be made very welcome.

Hi to everyone else.

Sharon - Haven't heard from you in a while, how are you?

We can't start TTC yet and are waiting to until after two cycles. This is driving me crazy, my best friend that miscarried right before I did is pregnant again and that is all that she talks about. I am happy for her but I am jealous. I know that waiting will increse our chances of it being a healthy pregnancy next time. My fiance and I are getting married june 9th, so i am trying to focus on that for the time being, but after that I am going to go crazy. My other friend from highschool just called me all excited because she is "pregnant, too", and I had to tell her that I a not pregnant anymore. I feel awful. I keep thinking that maybe after I have my next period that we could try again, but the dr told me to wait. So I know that I should. Sorry for my rant.

Good luck to everyone here and I hope that everyone gets pregnant soon.

Jenjams - sounding very positive, I understand your hesitation, but it is looking promising! Still got everything crossed for you!

Trying to be positive - Sorry you need to be here, but welcome! It's a fantastic and supportive group. Sometimes it can take a bit for your body to get back to normal, I hope it's not long before it does and you can start ttc again.

satya - thanks for clearing that up! I should start drinking the green tea now, have plenty here, on day 3 of clomid and due for first scan next Monday. I like those odds too, and as you said, there's no history of anything going wrong by doing it! Anything is worth a try. I take folate anyway and have been for a while. Happy Birthday to you too!! Hope you have had a wonderful day!!

shoegal - sorry for your loss :( Advice is always differing on when to start ttc again. I guess really it depends on when you feel ready, the plus of waiting for AF is that you know exactly where you are in your cycle. My cycles are generally long and it took 38 days to come back, hope yours is here a lot sooner!

Lee - good luck with your wedding this weekend! How exciting, and yes, even more special if you conceive a wedding baby! Sperm can survive for up to 48 hours, so if you think you are close to 'O'...maybe it wouldn't hurt to start! So sorry to hear again about your precious baby :(

Patience - sorry for your loss also :(

Sharon - how are you going sweet????

Hi to everyone else :)

Hi girls,

Happy birthday Satya!!!! I hope you have a fantastic day! :happybirthday:

Patience - welcome. I am glad you have enjoyed reading our little thread! Feel free to post anytime you like - it can feel good to get it all out, and we understand what you are going through. It is so sad that we will never again experience the joy of a BFP or feel the confidence and excitement of pregnancy. After a m/c, it is just never the same. I would love to be one of those people for whom it works out and to never have felt this pain and uncertainty. I just keep telling myself that will only make it more special when it works out, as we truly understand what a miracle it really is.

Lee - wow - your wedding is so close now! Your little boy will be there with you in spirit. I would BD tonight if you can be bothered, just to give yourself the best chance, but it is up to you. It would be great if you only BD'ed on your wedding night, and got pg, then you would know it was a wedding night bub!

shoegal - welcome and sorry to hear of your loss. There are way too many girls in here and I wish no one had to go through this ever. 22 May was actually the EDD of my first loss, so it is a date I will always remember. I'm not sure when AF will come, but it is a good sign that your HCG is so low - I would expect AF anyday. The opinions on when to TTC again are all different - I got told anything from starting again straight away to waiting 3 months (one dr told me there is a higher chance of m/cing again if you fall within 3 mths of a m/c, but I have since confirmed that this is rubbish - so who knows who to believe if even the drs have no idea!). I reckon just wait for one AF to give your body a chance to recover, and wait longer if you feel you need more time emotionally. :hug:

jen - :confetti: woo hoo! Love your ticker!!! So happy for you!!! I can understand you being scared, but all is sounding great - you will be having a beautiful baby!!!

pash - the TWW is torture, isn't it? I am glad you feel you are figuring things out, it is all so confusing at first. I can't believe how much I have learnt over the last year or so, but it takes a while to understand it all. Fingers crossed!

TTBP - welcome and sorry to hear your news. I lurked here for ages before posting as I was too shy too! Don't worry - we are all very nice and would love to get to know you. I found my first cycle after each m/c was strange and was longer than normal, I think that's pretty common, but it should go back to normal soon. Don't worry, it is unlikely to be a sign of other problems, just your body getting itself back to normal again.

Sharon - how are you going?

Salt - 8DPO already! It is so hard trying not to look for symptoms and reading too much into things. I really do hope this is the one for you, and it is sounding very positive so far :crossfingers: One of the things I found when pg was a very calm feeling which I don't usually get, so maybe that's a good sign?

I got a phone call from the clinic last night and was told to get another BT this morning. I am so sick of the early starts to get BTs before work, and am not sleeping well - I am soooo tired. We were not told to BD last night, so I must not have O'ed yet, but we did BD anyway (naughty naughty). They will phone again this afternoon and tell me what is happening, but apparently I should O very very soon, I am hoping today or tomorrow. DH is funny - he told me that after BD, I should lie on my back and hug my legs to help the spermies reach their destination. I told him that's not necessary, but he made me do it anyway! Next thing he will be having me do headstands against the wall after BD!

WOW! What an incredible thread. Thankyou for your responses heybacko, BekZ, saltprincess, *las* and Bun.

I really value your opinions since we have only told immediate family and they are supportive but don't have the knowledge of what we are going through.

I am having a good day today. Only one big cry, I think this thread has really given me strength. Now I must wait for AF to arrive...

Thankyou again, I am floored by your incredibly encouraging words.

:heartbeat:
shoegal

Hi everyone,

I kind of burst on to the scene with a big vent in another thread, but thought I would introduce myself properly in here and well, soak up the lovin' that everyone dishes out so well in here.

AF arrived, so May was a no go for us, but June will definately be our month :crossfingers:

We have been TTC since October 2004, and since this time have had 6 m/c - all of them before 8 weeks and only 3 requiring a d/c. I have had every test under the sun (thanks to a great OB), but the cause is unexplained and therefore incredibly frustrating.

Anyway, you seem like an really really nice bunch of people so thanks - finally I can delurk and join in the "fun"!!

Cheers Mel

Hi everyone,

Welcome Mel, Shoegal and imwiththedj - I am so sorry for your losses and I hope your stay here is really short. Bun is right there are way too many of us in here :(

Happy birthday satya - I hope you've had a really nice day and been spoilt rotten :)

Bun - LOL at your DH!! That's bummer about not sleeping well, I know how you feel. I haven't had a decent night sleep for ages now because of all the turmoil I've been in and also I think because I know I have to try to get some sleep to do my temp the next morning. But I hope it all turns out to be worth it for you this month when you get your BFP!

saltprincess - blah to the TWW!! I'm in it now too and just about over it!

BekZ - I hope everything is going well for you

Lee - I'm so so sorry about your little boy :( It really makes you wonder how a hospital and doctor can let this happen. And yep, just keep going with the OPKs until you get a positive - I hope it happens for you in the next couple of days. And all the best for your wedding this weekend, we had a garden wedding when we got married (a few years ago now! LOL) and it was lovely. Fingers crossed for a honeymoon baby for you!

jenjams - congratulations, sounds very promising to me! I also wanted to reasssure you about the cramps as well - in the early stages of my pregnancy with DD I had doubled over in pain type cramps and eveything went on to be OK. As long as there's no bleeding, try not to worry too much OK? All the best to you.

pash - all the best for your TWW - fingers crossed!

Well I'm also nearing the end of the TWW, 9 DPO today. And feeling really well apart from a sore tongue where I bit it when DD headbutted me in the chin while she was having a hissy in our local shopping centre because there was already another kiddie in the Big Red Car ride she wanted to go on! Ouch! LOL the joys of toddlers!

My normal LP is 10 days, but it has been all over the place lately, so I guess AF could be due any time after Saturday. I'm not really expecting it to arrive that early, but probably early next week instead - who knows? I'm planning to hold out on the testing until early next week - Monday or Tuesday I think. I don't feel particularly pregnant, but I don't feel like I'm not either KWIM? I think when I was pregnant with DD from memory, I didn't have any signs except for needing to go to the loo a lot, and I'm pretty sure that was by the time I was about 5 weeks along - I didn't find out until I was 6 weeks along with her. So I don't know, but I'm still feeling really positive, we timed BDing really well this month (unlike last!) so until AF shows up I'm staying hopeful! :)

Anyway, I'll check back in next week hopefully with some good news - fingers crossed!!

All the best to everyone I've missed :)

Hi everyone,

Thanks for all the birthday wishes. Today has been pretty good. I got a beautifully worded card from my DF this morning before he rushed off to work. Have to wait for the present when he gets home with his daughter very shortly. Had cake at work, had to endure them all singing happy birthday.... how embarassing.

Sharon - how are you going?

jenjams - I'm glad the lines are getting darker. I have my fingers & toes crossed for you.

Shoegal - Welcome. I'm so sorry for your loss. Your AF can return within 2 to 10 weeks but usually between 4 & 6 weeks.

Lee - Good luck with the wedding & Oing. Let's hope you can combine the two and have a honeymoon baby.

Patience - Welcome. I'm sorry for your loss. I hope you find the support you need here.

Salt & Las - I did some more research on green tea. I've found heaps of sites that say don't have it at all but others that say it's OK as long as you take a supplement and that it could be best to stop all together if you know you are pregnant. I'm only going to drink it up til O time and only a cup or two at most per day. I also came across heaps of bad stuff about caffeine - possibly causing SIDs, miscarriages & even birth defects if you drink a heap of it each day. Heaps of pg women still drink coffee, tea & cola. I'm already off the cola & coffee & only drink moderate amounts of tea.

Jacobsmum - so glad to see that you've joined us. We are a very supportive group here.

Megsum - fingers crossed that your AF stays away.

Bun - those blood tests must be driving you mad. I guess that's one of the reasons I'm hesitant about going to a FS - it can really impact on your day to day life. I'm hoping that if I go to a gyn it might be a little less intrusive.

Anyway I'd better get going. Sorry to anyone I've missed.