TTC after Miscarriage or Loss ~ April 08

Hi Everyone

Its Saturday in Perth and it has been pouring with rain nearly all day. It actually feels nice to put a jumper on instead of sweating like the proverbial in 36+ degrees like we have all summer!

I decided today with DH (my decision really) not to go and have my second HCG test. I just figured that its up to my body and this baby for this pregnancy to work and all my energy needs to put towards making this baby grow big and strong - not chasing numbers from a blood test which I have no control over anyway. So I feel a lot better and relaxed and have been giving our bub little 'pep talks' (silly I know but hey if it works!) about growing strong and healthy. FUnnily enough I have had some m/s today! So thanks to everyone for your kind words and support!

KBowman - thank you so much hun for getting me that information. I really appreciate. Dirty 30's - I tried that and we fell pregnant. Maybe there is some truth to it!

Jodsan - glad to hear you found a good doctor sweetie. Its so important. And your Dr is right - exercise didnt cause you to m/c so dont do that to yourself. When I fell pregnant with DD I was competing at a national level from 1500m track to 21km road running. I even raced up until I was three months and then continued running up until the night before we were induced. I was so important for my body and especially my head. Unless your Dr says not too, keep up the exercise. At the worst you'll have a body you love!!

Trac73 - thinking of you for your blood tests on Tuesday. You are going to have a wonderful pregnancy I can feel it!

ll80 and JMG - :crossfingers: that your syptoms are a BFP!

Magda - how are you going??

Hi!
I am having a nice, lazy Saturday, chattiIng on the phone and generally chilling. The weather has been MAD here. It has gone from glorious sunshine with a real summer feel during the week, to -3 degrees at 9am this morning, then rain, then snow, and now lovely sun again! Weird!

Jodsan, I totally get what you mean about exercise. I had heard that you aren't supposed to let your heart rate go over 140 whilst pgt, but I wasnt really sure whether that was true or not. I went running a few weeks before my m/c and we were doing hill training. I treid to 'hold back' and just take it easy, but still ended up very out of breath. I did wonder whether that effected the outcome or not, but after reading this forum, I think not. Get back in the gym and feel good!:D

Mollycat- Thanks for your comments about not drinking cyber wine for 12 months. I was confused at first, but then got it! (9months of pgy and 3 breast feeding- right?) Sorry to hear that AF has popped up, you sound positive though, GL for April

TM- :hugs: Sorry about the BFN. I am going to give you the same advice that I was given last time- It's not over until it's over- there is still a chance, if AF is not here yet. I found that last month was a big dissappointment, as like you, DH and I had no trouble conceiving the first 2. I really thought that it would be a peice of cake and my hopes were just too high. If AF does come, GL for April.

MelA- Hi! Thanks for the info about spiders ( I also have spider dreams) I've not had them for a while, so I guess I dont have to re-build the web of my life just
now. That's good, 'cos I quite like my life now. (In fact I like it so much that I am trying to make a new person to share it with!) Oh, enjoy your beauty treatments- they sound lush!

AFM- Absolutely NO preggy symptoms. I feel OK about it, as I am fairly sure that this is not my month, but I dont know how I'll feel when AF gets here. It's an odd thing to admit, but I quite like being in the 2ww. It is an exciting time and even though I am fairly sure that I am not UTD, there is always a tiny speck of hope. Oooh, you may have noticed that I have found out how to change the colour of the font for names, I think that makes a post look quite pretty!

I hope that everyone is OK, Hi to all I havent mentioned (there are so many of us, but hopefully that will change soon)
It's time for another BFP to cheer us all up- come on girls!

Hello ladies. It's been a few days since I've posted, but I've been keeping up with everything! It's been a tough week for me. Went back to work on Wed. I work at my son's school as a noon duty aide--and, until Wed., I've been able to avoid most questions from the kids (most of whom knew that I was pg). One little girl in particular would ask me what I was having every time she saw me. I figured she knew by now about the m/c--it's been a month today. But she asked me on Wed., and completely threw me off guard. I told her I would talk to her about it later, b'cuz I was incapable of saying anything else. Then a little girl in my son's class (1st grade) walked up to me out of the blue and told me that her mom's baby died, too. This made me feel really bad, because I had previously complained about a couple other moms at the school that were pg., saying how hard it was for me to see these pg. women that were due around the same time as me. This woman in particular hadn't even seen her dr. or had her first appt. yet (at almost 3 mo's!) and I was feeling annoyed because of this (b'cuz I had just m/c and thought that I had been doing everything right, and here she was pg. and not even bothering to go to the dr!). Then her daughter tells me that her mom's baby died, too-and it felt like all the air had been sucked out of my body! Obviously, I had nothing to do with her m/c, and I never would've wished it to happen to her, but b'cuz I was annoyed with her for being pg, it's hard for me to not feel any guilt! Then yesterday I had to have one of the other noon aides tell the girl (the one that would always ask me what I was having) about the m/c so that she wouldn't ask me that dreaded question again! Of course, it was the first time I had even brought it up to any of the noon aides, so it was pretty hard. They've all been trying to be very respectful by not bringing it up to me at all, pretending like it never even happened, but that doesn't make it much better. The hard ones are the ones that didn't know about the m/c and ask me when I'm due!
So now I'm on CD 6. Went to Fertility Friend to figure out how to chart my cycle. It's weird b'cuz according to my chart my fertile days begin on Mon., and it says I should be O'ing by Wed.! Could that be right? Could I really O so soon after AF? Thought AF was done yesterday, but she tricked me and came back later in the afternoon, although much lighter than the previous 3 days! My first couple days were really heavy--though I figure that's probably common for the first period after m/c. So maybe we'll begin ttc tonight (which would make DF very happy as he's been "missing me"), since they say that if you bd 3 days prior to O there's a better chance for a girl! I'm not going to be picky, though, I'll take what I can get--as long as it's healthy! I just really want to "feel" pg. again! The things that annoyed me just a few mo's ago--peeing 3 times a night, insomnia, feeling starving all the time, waking up every morning at 6:00 and eating oatmeal (I usually skipped breakfast until I was pg!) b'cuz I was so hungry, big, perky boobs! I miss feeling all those things! I still sleep with my hands on my tummy--wishing my baby was still in there! Sorry guys--just needed to get that out. Just bringing it up to DF is hard on both of us. It's easier for men to ignore it in order to maintain the "norm". While for me, I try to act like I'm not thinking about it, but it's ALWAYS there, like a slideshow constantly running in the back of my mind. I find myself half listening to people when they're talking to me, because the slideshow is running in the other half of my mind at the same time. I find myself wondering if they know that I'm not really listening to them, because my mind is consumed by my baby--isn't that terrible? Again, I'm sorry for feeling so sorry for myself-it's helpful knowing that there are others out there that know exactly what I'm talking about! At least here I don't feel so abnormal! Thanks everyone, for listening and caring!
My prayers are with all of you!

Oh Jen, what you have described in ur post is all too familiar to me and I'm sure there would be others here that relate too. Having ur hands on ur tummy in bed and wishing that ur baby was still there is particularly memorable. Even in the months after while TTC I would put my hands on my tummy whilst in bed and focus so that my will was strong enough to put a baby in there. When I had my first m/c which was picked up at u/s i had to wait a day before i could have the D&C. That evening I just didn't want anyone taking my babies (twins) out of there cos I simply wanted to protect them in my own body even tho I knew they were dead. The cruelest thing too was that I was still getting m/s that evening - the sign that I usually attribute to a healthy pg. I can relate to ur sideshow (that is an excellent way to describe it!) and half listening to people. I feel for you for the range of emotions that come out while at ur DS's school - I don't have any helpful tips there nor with the FF fertility days. All I can suggest to you is to try to be strong and have faith that u will be pg again. I always think of my mum's favourite saying at times likes these and it does help me - "the personal success is how we deal with grace and dignity the atrocities of life" - hope it helps you in some way. Hugs hun.

Canary - hun we do need a BFP in here!! I had no pg symptoms whatsoever when I found out I was pg with DS - so for you it aint over til it's over!! If AF does come (I so pray it doesn't) then u will be only a couple of days behind me - we'll have some cyber wine together and drink to the BFPs we'll get next cycle - deal?

Natty - you are being so positive right now - that's so fantastic - good for you!!! The power of talking to your bub would be helping ur little one so much - keep it up!! :clap:

Hello and good morning to everyone else - :grouphug:

I'm on the first day of full flow and back for another go-'round.

kbowman: thanks for that hcg info!

Jodsan: yeah, they always talk about the importance of exercize and I really do believe them, but part of me gets scared I might overdo it.

plc1805: so how did the cardiac test go? did you get your results back (I'm a nurse--I always find this stuff facinating)

Natty: I'm impressed with our attitude, and I don't know if I'd be that strong not to check. But actually, your not worrying about it will probably make you more comfortable psychologically

Canary: I'm the opposite of you--I hate the TWW. Of course, I"m usually uncomfortable with ambiguity

jen805: I'm so sorry. I thinkg ikwym, however--I tend to withdraw a bit during times of grief and the getting back to "real life" is so hard. I always felt a little bit resentful (illogical, I know) that other people's lives were just rolling along even as I was facing some tragedy. Sending cyberhug

My goodnes you ladies have been busy posting. I haven't had much time to pop on lately and there is just too m uch to catch up on to do personals so I will just say a quick HI to everyone and sending :stickyvibesgirl::bluedust: to each and all of you.

I am at the start of the TWW. . . . I thought I was in it about a week and a half ago, but turns out my body is screwing with me and what I thought was O on CD14 was no and instead I O'd on CD33 (give or take a day) so it's a veeeeeeeeery long cycle. Stupid body :doh::doh: It's very mind consuming when you are waiting, but I really don't think that this month was the month for it to happen.

Hi Ladies..
I just came across this positive affimation on another forum and would like to share with you all as we go through this difficult process...

Affirmation

In this time of loss I call upon my spirit within to guide me to my strength so that I may find peace and completion.
I will use this strength to demand of myself and others my need to grieve completely, for this will be my first step to healing.
During my time of grief I will seek guidance not only from my inner spirit but from loving persons who may offer wisdom and comfort.
I need to understand that the soul as well as the physical body needs healing and to pay attention to this. I will learn to accept that the soul may never heal completely.
I will learn to live not in fear and once again see beauty in my world and purpose in my existence.
In spite of my new knowledge that things happen that cannot be controlled, I must call upon the places within me that tell me I do have control over much of my life and use this control to aid my healing.
Let me recognize the gift in my ability to conceive and carry life however briefly.
Let me take joy in my ability to love so deeply and desire to nurture a soul unbeknownst to me.
Let me find healing in the belief that this soul knew my love for it and that that love helped it to pass to another place.
Let me honor this short life not only with my love but in finding meaning in its existence.
Let me recognize this meaning in not only my ability to survive, but in my fullest appreciation of all the moments motherhood will bring me, along with my deeper compassion and sisterhood to other women who've experienced loss.
Let a part of this soul be reflected in the spirit of my future children, born or adopted, so that I may know it through them.
I will listen to and trust the place in my deepest heart that tells me I will once again be reunited with this soul and will fulfill the need to hold it in my arms.
I will help myself to feel comfort in the knowledge that there is a star in heaven that belongs to me.

Take Care..

Hi everyone

I haven't been in for a few days but have been keeping up to date with everything. I hope everyone is feeling great and trying to stay positive.

AFM I have been feeling a little off the last few days. Showing some simes of a BFP coming my way, but I am a little :confused:. AF is due tomorrow, but I haven't been able to help myself, so I have been POAS. Some have been a BFN, but some have had that faint 2nd line appear. So I guess I just need to suck it up and think about something else (Yeah right) for a couple of days before testing again, just to be sure, to be sure!
I have had symptoms of both pregnancy and AF so it could go either way, but I intend to stay positive no matter what the outcome.

Natty - Thanks for the :crossfingers:. I have everything crossed at the moment.
Good for you for deciding not to have the 2nd hcg test. Keep the unwanted stress and worry away any way you can.

Wishing everyone
:stickyvibesboy::stickyvibesgirl::stickyvibesboy:
and
:bluedust::bluedust::bluedust:
for our ttc journey.

Jen- :hugs: I read your post with a lump in my throat. It is so familiar to me, and I expect to all of us here. Dont worry about the pregnt lady who you 'complained' about. If she has been through a loss herself, I am sure that she will understand how you are feeling right now and will not hold it against you. For me, going back to work was hard at first, and a struggle not to burst into tears, but it does get easier. Gradually, work will be a distraction and the questions and comments from the kids will stop. IKWYM about half- listening to people- when I first went back to work in January, I did some things that I couldnt remember doing a week later! Remember to be KIND to yourself, and dont expect too much from yourself right now. As someone said a few posts ago, now is the time to be selfish. Take care, I hope that things get easier soon.

plc1805- Deal! AF is due on Weds, so I'll crack open a bottle of cyber wine then.

TM- I'm sorry that AF has reared her ugly head. GL for April

JMG- Yay!! I'm not sure whether we can say congrats on your BFP yet??? It sounds as though it is just around the corner though!

So I woke up this morning feeling like I've had a hard night on the grog, only, I was a good girl. Once I ate I felt fine but the penny dropped.

So was out at the shops this afternoon decided to buy a test.
POAS and BFP!! was feint but was there.
Feeling nauscious on and off all day. This was how it started with DD and only got worse. So whilst it's a good sign, i'm dreading it. So many emotions, excited, little scared but feeling positive, I just knew.

Luckily I alreacy had an appt. at gp tomorrow for blood test results so I hope they are good.

Just meant to be this month.
On a side note my notebook crapped itself so i'm using my pda, i'm such a techno geek I cried when it wouldn't start up, luckily my uni assignment was handed in. DH is an IT man so he's fixing it, still going but almost fixed. Had tojump on and tell someone.

Catch up with you all when my notebook is fixed

....LAURA

plc1805--Thanks so much for your post--just the fact that someone else knows exactly what I mean helps so much! Losing one was so hard, my heart breaks for you that you lost two at the same time! I can't even imagine, and almost feel stupid for complaining about my loss when yours (and so many others) had to have been so much harder to deal with! I've been feeling so lonely--DF and kids help somewhat, but they just don't know what to do or say around me. It's like everyone is walking on egg shells. I feel like I'm always 1/2 a second away from breaking down. Then I feel like it's been a month, so it should be getting easier--yet at times it just feels like I'm regressing. I truly don't feel like I'll be happy again until I get that BFP! Trying to stay strong and have faith is so hard when the slideshow just keeps going.... Thanks again for your post--everyone's posts are the only things keeping me sane right now!

tempus--I, too, tend to withdraw during these times. I just don't know what to do or say, or even how to act! Just can't seem to keep my emotions under wrap. I know I'm alive, because I'm breathing and moving, but inside I feel completely dead and just at a loss... It's amazing how everyone here makes me feel somewhat "normal", and much less selfish than I let myself feel. Thanks so much for your post!

Emmy-Lou--Thanks for the positive affirmation! I'm not kidding when I say that this forum is my saving grace!

JMG--Hope your signs are those of a BFP! Keep up the positive thoughts!

Canary--Thanks so much for understanding! Despite everything we've all been through, I have to think that things happen for a reason, and we've all been brought together by the grace of God to help each other through these tough times!

Laura--Congrats on the BFP! I truly hope this is the month for you! Good luck tomorrow at your appt! Wishing you a healthy, happy pg!

Natty--how did your interview go?

Forgot to ask on my last post, but I was wondering if anyone could tell me the significance of taking a baby aspirin a day? Does it help aid in conception, or is it something that I'll have to take even while I'm pg? Thanks....

One more thing, I was wondering if anyone could tell me how to add my ticker to my signature? It says I have to cut and paste the code--when I do that, the code shows up instead of my ticker! Help!

Hello Everyone!:hello:
Jen805~ Just thought that I would let you know that I also read your post and it really hit home for me also. It is hard not to feel like everyone is looking at you and analyzing how you are feeling and wanting to talk to you and all you want to do is crawl in a hole and hide until it doesn't hurt anymore...Time will heal us though and I believe we will both be on the BFP train again soon!:pray:

Last night, I had a similar pain...We went to dinner with some friends of ours and one of the girls was pg just a few weeks before me and lucky for me, last night she was already showing. At first, it hurt to even look at her-but eventually I was able to let it go....and then the unthinkable, right in front of me (and yes she knew I m/c) she actually started complaining about being pregnant and about growing fat and about what was she going to do with two kids now!!! I was so outraged and screaming on the inside and yet I had to stand there and try to smile...My DH and I got in the car and he immediately let me know that he had heard it too and that he was sorry...we were all going to our house and I told him if she complains one more time, I was going to have to say something because it was hurting my feelings....Back at the house, she didn't complain but the conversation was all about babies on and on-I almost felt like she was rubbing my face in it...It;s funny how some people are so caring and others are just downright insensitive...I was happy for her to go home at the end of the night but as a group, we did end up having a good time playing Apples to Apples (a fun group party game if you have never played). Thanks for letting me vent!!!!:(

On the symptoms side of things, I feel like there still might be a chance for me this month...I had bleeding light at 4dpo and then a little more on 5-7 and now it has stopped...I have some tightness in my abdomen and breasts are just slightly sore so I am really hoping maybe I will get a BFP-no testing until next Saturday-if I can help it...:pray:

Congratulations and Good luck to JMG and Laura-I hope your blood tests are big healthy numbers!:lol:

mmteacher--Can't believe how self-controlled you were last night! I think I would've lost it for sure! The world has too many selfish, insensitive people in it! Praying for you that your symptoms are those of a BFP!

mmteacher--who needs enemies when you have friends like that? I don't know how you held yourself together, you have much more restraint than I would've had! Hard to believe how selfish and insensitive people can be--especially when they know what you've been through!
I'm praying for you that this is your month! Symptoms sound very positive! Hope your right about the BFP train--I would love to be on that train with you! Good luck and stay positive!

lol--sorry for sending 2 posts in a row--couldn't find the first one after I typed it, so I re-typed it. Then, of course, once it was posted they were both there! I'll get this thing figured out one of these days!

Hi
My name is Mary. I found this board yesterday while searching online. We lost our baby Abigail Rosette at 19 weeks 4 days I delivered her on Feb.22nd. We found out that she had passed away in utero 4 days before that. The day just seemed like I was stuck in a nightmare. I just couldnt believe that she was gone. We have her ashes with us in the house and we have a box with her things as well as we have a rose plant in front for her. I just got my first period which I thought would make me relieved but it seemed to start the greif all over for me, actually surprised me how sad I have been. I was just sobbing and sobbing yesterday and been crying constantly. I had been trying to keep it to myself so my family wouldnt "suffer" but my husband got upset and I finally broke down and sobbed for over an hour with him. We are planning on trying again this month and hoping it will happen as quickly as The Lord allows. And we have trulley felt Gods presence with us through this entire thing, He has been so everpresent for us and we are so thankful for that. I dont know what else to say, but I hope to find some support and friendship here with people who understand. Thank you and God bless you all
Mary

Oh, Mary, I'm so sorry for your loss! Wish I could give you a big hug! Thanks so much for posting your story. Unfortunately, it's one that we understand all too well. Give yourself time to grieve--it's good to cry and get it all out. For me, just posting my story helped so much! It's been a tough month for me... I still break down sobbing and it's been a month since my m/c. The pain will never go away completely, but it will get easier every day. Some days are worse than others. Hoping and praying the Lord answers your prayers soon and your ttc journey is super short! You've come to the right place for friendship and support!

Hi All.

MM - I am so sorry you had to endure such an insensitive friend. I find it so amazing how people can be totally insensitive and not pick up on how uncomfortable they make people. I have been in similar situations and I always feel that if I walked away it would cause a scene so i just stand there and put up with it. We had a friend going on and on recently at a lunch at our house about how his girlfriend is now qualified to do 3D scans - and how it is really for women who are having their first baby or just want some reassurance. At first i didn't mind but after he had been going on about it for ages, I started to get uncomfortable. He didn't seem to get that he was talking about a very sensitive subject and that WE are exactly the people who will be anxious. All the other women at our place were dead silent - I am sure they knew he had gone on for too long. You did well to get through her whinging - and she just doesn't realise how lucky she is. :hug:

Jen - Hi. I can not remember if we have met. If not welcome and I hope your time here will be short but also supportive. Baby aspirin is usually for thinning the blood - so if you have been diagnosed with a clotting disorder they usually advise you to take aspirin. I have had pretty much every clotting test done and all were negative, so I am not taking aspirin for this pregnancy. I am not sure if there is any other reason for taking it. I would suggest you talk to you GP if you think you need to take it.

Laura - congratulations!!! Another BFP to add to the list. :stickyvibesboy: :bluedust: :stickyvibesgirl: I hope you continue to feel well 9even with the ms) and have a lovely and uneventful 9 months.

:bellygrowing: :happyforyou: :happyforyou: :happyforyou: :happyforyou: :happyforyou: :happyforyou: :bellygrowing:

Thank you so much Jen! Hugs to you as well. I am also so sorry for your loss. Thank you for the welcome.
Mary

Laura yey!!! :happyforyou: Hope the blood tests turn out to be really, really high. Sending you some :stickyvibesboy:

JMG - sounding really positive, a faint line is still a line! Let us know when you POAS again.

mmteacher - I am really sorry about your difficult evening. I'm sure your friend was not trying to be insensitive, she probably just didn't know how to handle it. She was probably feeling really uncomfortable out of guilt that her pregnancy is going well when yours didn't. That's probably why she thought she'd "downplay" her joy about it by pointing out the negatives of pregnancy. Some peope just dont have the right words. Sending you a big hug :hugs:

Mary - I'm so sorry for your loss. Thankyou for sharing your story with us. I cannot begin to understand your grief as my loss was so early but I know you will find the support you need here, there are many amazingly strong women with amazing words of wisdom. I have felt really understood here when many other people just dont get it and I hope that you will feel the same way. :hug:

Big hello to everyone else, hope your Monday is going well!

Have been reading all of the posts but haven't posted - struggling to keep up with all of the activity in here.

Laura - Congratulations - wishing you a happy, healthy & enjoyable pregnancy. :confetti:

JMG - sounds promising. Good luck, is probably just too early to tell yet. Hope to see a BFP next to your name over the next few days!

Welcome Mary - I am sorry to hear of your loss and I'm sure you will find good support in here. The ladies in here are great.

Hugs and :bluedust: for everyone. Am in the anxious tww now.

Thank you so much Jodsan and AJC for the welcome. God bless you
Mary

Jen805~Thank you for your kind words of support...It really helps to have you girls on my side!:)

Mary~So glad you found us and so sorry for your loss-healing will take some time but it will happen-hang in there!:hugs:

Katiegirl~Thank you also for your kind support-what you said made a lot of sense...maybe she was trying to down play it-I hadn't really thought of it that way...Hopefully that is true because it would make her a lot less inconsiderate.

Jodsan~Thank you-you made a good point also and I hope that it was the reason for the way she acted.

AJC~GL in the TWW...I am hoping for a BFP for you!:pray:

Back to Monday tomorrow for hopefully a quick rest of the TWW for me!:p

well, ive started bleeding, so i guess im out for another month...feeling really down, so im sorry for no personals...guess there will be no christmas present for me after all...i was so desperately praying for a xmas baby as i found out about my m/c on my bday last year(19/12), and had the DnC on boxing day, so i was hoping to make this xmas a happier one...guess its not meant to be...

Mary-M....Welcome, one day at a time and like you I have faith in God - we will hold our babies one day but for now in our hearts...

tina_k...sorry you won't have the xmas pesent you wanted...thinking of you and take care..

Laura and Il80 - CONGRATS LADIES...:dance:

Hello to everyone else...
Well as for me AF should arrive tomorrow if my cycles are back to normal!!! Here's hoping she won't arrive though...

oxoxoxox

mary - welcome and sorry to hear of your loss.
hi to everyone else

I cannot cannot cannot believe it - I just spent an hour if not more on this huge post and somehow it got eaten up - GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!

I simply don't have the energy to repeat it all but profoundest, deepest, heartfelt condolences, words of encouragement, feelings of empathy, and the like were conveyed to you all - to those in TWW, to those with AF approaching, to tina who just got AF (I don't know why x amount of AFs arrive before a BFP honey, just gotta believe it will happen for us), to those challenged by the ignorance of others (mmteacher - my mother's favourite saying "the personal success is the way in which we deal with grace and dignity the atrocities of life" - u r testimony to that!), to those with very very recent grief (mary - welcome, my previous post was so much more eloquent but, even given my misfortune, i truly respect the grief of those suffering loss beyond the first trimester (with the utmost respect to the rest of my friends in here) - when one allows oneself to think all is ok and then it isn't - allow urself to grieve without apology - ur angel girl will forever live in ur heart, never forgotten). Hello to everyone - all i have to say about me is that i have 8 sleeps to go til i get that green light to TTC, times in nicely with o but can't allow myself to believe in such perfection, conceiving in my first cycle back. DHs SA cam back normal so at least it's not him as well :rolleyes:
Huge :grouphug: everybody!

Oh boy I can't believe that I forgot to mention that I had also congratulated -

ll80 - :confetti::confetti: HUGE CONGRATS hun - well deserved and another successful win for the team!!!! :confetti::confetti:

JMG - i offer you a CONGRATULATORY HUG without saying the words til u actually confirm what you and I know what even a faint 2nd line means ;) - :hug:

Hi all
Well AF turned up, there was no need for primulot to start AF. Now we are back in the game and playing hard. We are at day 18 and TTWaiting. I've got a day 21 blood test on wednesday so lets hope O has happend, the DH can go back off duty. I have cross fingers, I felt a little sick on sunday and went to bed at 8:30 I woke up soooooo tired this morning. :pray: this is a good sign.

Till soon

Warm and sunny smiles Mel

Hi Ladies

I cant believe how many posts in such a short time!

mmteacher - I cant believe how insensitive your 'friend' was. Although I learnt from our m/c that a lot of it wasnt deliberate insensitivity but embarrassment because they didnt know how to act/behave/what to say. Maybe she feels really bad and was trying to cover up how much she actually hurts for you by saying that being pregnant wasnt that great etc???

MaryM - I am so sorry to hear your story. I hope your stay here is short and you get your BFP soon.

1180 - WOW - congratulations!!!:clap::clap::clap:

Jen085 - Keep smiling hun. Its hard I know but the difficult and uncomfortable situations will lessen and your wounds wont be reopened so often...

Emmy-Lou - thanks for the affirmation. It was very true.

JMG - :pray: that the BFP is brighter and stronger for you tomorrow.

TinaK - cyber hugs to you sweetie. Fingers crossed for a New Years baby for you.

Canary, plc805, tempur moriendi, Katiesgirl, Jodsan and everyone else I might have not mentioned (sorry) - :) hope your all going well.

As for me well I bumped into the midwife today in the corridor and she asked why i didnt do the blood test and then ordered me down to have it done (I work in a hospital). Anyway it came back at 3950 and my Obstetrician is very happy with the result as it is doubling every 48 hours.

Then I went to my interview and they have offered me the job so just have to wait for their HR people to write up the letter of offer. Now have to figure out what to do as I wont have much of a maternity leave but the money would finally make us comfortable (they are doubling my salary). You know, you only get your kids once in your life but then you want to be able to afford to take them to the movies, buy them decent clothes, be able to afford a car that hasnt done 220,000km with a broken airconditioner and radio. Its hard on women I think because nowadays its hard financially for us to look after our family's without our income and its hard on the men because they feel that they should be able to provide for their family without their wife working but the reality is with house prices, interest rates, petrol prices etc etc I dont know very many women who can afford not to work.:wall:

Anyway, I hope you are all well and happy or as happy as you can expect to be.:)

Hi everyone!

MaryM: Welcome! I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my baby girl later in pregnancy too and know just how difficult it is. Although I don't post here super often, I've found just reading the posts has helped me a lot, hopefully it gives you some comfort too!

Everybody else: :stickyvibesgirl::bluedust: for all of you!!

AFM: As some of you know, I'm currently TTC again and have yet another newbie question for you all (eventually I'll be a pro at this- but there are just so many questions!!). Sorry if this is TMI, but it's my understanding that when you ovulate your cm is quite sticky and then if you are not pregnant it goes away. I o'd about a week or so ago but I still have a lot of cm (some of it slightly tinged). Does this mean I could be pg? Maybe I'm just getting my hopes up, or maybe my body is just being odd!!

Good morning everyone.

MaryM - I am so sorry for your loss and I hope you find comfort and support here. I also lost my baby boy later in pregnancy (20 weeks) so I do understand how hard that is. I have found that the women on this site have helped me through some very dark days. There is also a thread for late losses which you are more than welcome to join as well. I post in both threads, as the loss of a baby no matter the age is a devastating experience and we all are able to help each other.

Tutmae - hi I don't think we have met. With CM, you may find that it continues after you have O'ed but it should change in appearance and texture (lovely!). So whilst O is eggwhite and sticky (also stretchy), the CM post O and prior to AF is more likely to be white and crusty on your underpants. Sorry for TMI but this is the best I can explain. You should generally feel dry in that region and not notice the CM too much. If you are still having eggwhite CM than I would keep BD to ensure you time O correctly. I hope that helps - and I hope I am correct! I practised Natural Family Planning for a while so that is generally how i was taught to check for fertility etc.

Natty - so happy to hear the HCG levels were excellent. I hope this means you can relax a bit. I know that relaxing at times seems the hardest thing, but try and take the good news and enjoy it (something I struggle with).

Hello to Everyone

Welcome to all the newies i am very sorry for your losses and i hope your visit here is a short one.

To all TWW i hope your wait flies by quickly and you receive the results that you want.

To all the BFP's i hope you are all doing well and keeping healthy

AFM - I had my blood test today to confirm pregnancy and shoul receive the results tomorrow. I know that it will be positive as we did another POAS on Sunday one day after period due and the line came up before i could even put it on the counter to read as well as the pg line was double the darkness than that of the test working indicator. I spoke to dr today about all this and he is thinking that we might be a little further along than we thought as my last period was late as well as light. but to be honest with you i am happy that i have a BFP. We have twins in both sides of our families and we thought maybe that is why the line appeared so quick and dark....well that is what DH is wanting to happen. I will let everyone know the results tomorrow.

Take Care Everyone

Hello Lovelies

Just wanted to let you know that I am moving on....

EDD 20 November... :bellygrowing:

Measuring 7wks + 6, so I was pretty spot on with my dates. Nice, healthy heartbeat.

And yes, whilst it is still early days, we are a step ahead of our last pregnancy and tonight I am going to bed happy and content for the 1st time in almost 3 months. I just want to cry with relief...

Good luck to you all and I hope that we will meet again soon in the PAML thread!!!

Hi again

ll80 - Good on you for the positive result. It may be feint, but feint is great news. It could have been no line at all. :dance:

Natty - Congratulations on the hcg count from your blood test and the new job. I agree with you on the money side of things. Money worries are one of the worst worries to have. Money doesn't always bring happiness, but it can help you and your family on the way to becoming comfortable.

Trac73 - Congratulations of the positive test and good luck with the blood tests tomorrow. :crossfingers: for a great hcg count.

Brockstar - Great news. Good luck in the new thread. Hopefully we can catch up with you in there some day soon.

AFM well I have kept a bit of a low profile and waited to POAS because I got the 'not pregnant' result from the digital test I did the other day I waited to do another one. (Although couldn't resist using a few normal tests while I waited!) This morning I decided to do 1 normal HPT and 1 digital when I first woke up.
They both were :bfp:, but I was particularly excited with the digital test saying 'pregnant' so I took a photo!!
I am going to my doctor next Monday to confirm everything as I want to just wait it out a little more before seeing him. I am very happy and as I am in a much less stressful job this time around I am much more confident that this pregnancy could just well stick. I don't want to move on just yet if that's okay. I just might stick around for another week or 3!!!

:goodluck: and :grouphug: for everyone else hoping for a :bfp: this month.

Woohoo - JMG. CONGRATULATIONS!!!:happyforyou:

trac73, Natty & Brockstar - glad to hear you and your bubs' are doing well. :confetti:

tutmae - Hi, I don't think we've met before. I guess all of our bodies are different but I always get CM even after O. I do remember that last time I was pg it was more watery than usual which was one of the signs which encouraged me to POAS. Good luck and I hope it is pg CM that you have. :goodluck:

tinak - sorry about af. A big pg belly would be a nice Christmas present too - that's what I am telling myself anyway. I know that won't make me feel better if af arrives in 10 days.

MelA - GL for test tomorrow and hope it's a BFP for you this cycle. I'm going for my test am - I like to get it over and done with. Strange thing is I'm actually looking forward to it because I feel like I am 'doing' something rather than just waiting?!?! If that makes sense?

:bluedust: for the TTC'ers and
:stickyvibesboy: for the PG ladies
:grouphug: for everyone !!!

Ok let me formally congratulate u then JMG - woohoo!!! :confetti::confetti::confetti: well done sweet!!

Brockstar - it was so lovely having you in our fold for the time u were here and I hope to join u again sometime soon in the paml thread!! Take care!!

Tempus - thanks so much for asking re the heart monitoring - I had my follow-up appt tonight and all clear. I think that that is mainly to do with the fact I didn't have any palps while the monitor was on. Doc said if i have any more episodes to try to get to a hosp asap so i can get monitored appropriately. Otherwise, all good! Hope ur doin ok hun!

tutmae - sweet for the life of me I can't remember whether I welcomed u so welcome!! and I offer my heartfelt sympathies to u and DP/DH for ur loss.

Hey everyone else!!!

Hi all, just a quickie to say congratulations JMG! :happyforyou:
:stickyvibesboy: :stickyvibesgirl:

I'll pop back in tomorrow to do some personals. Til then, sending some :bluedust: