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Hi ladies
Thanks for the sweet posts and texts today. Today was an ok day. I started the day by giving my boy a big kiss and hug and in some weird way it made me feel a little better. I know only 2 sleeps until DH is home and we are all under one roof again.
Mel: Good luck with the test tomorrow. You so deserve some great news. I agree, if you are paying for the IUI then there is no reason in my opinion for it not to occur. Tell him Spring said you had to have IUI and if not then he can answer to me. I hope so much that this is your month, I have everything crossed for you. :crossfingers:
Klee: Wow, what a wonderful story. I will share a similar experience that I had. DH and I were in the car driving to pick up Harry's ashes and we pulled up at the lights. There was a blue semi-trailer beside us and it had a name printed across the back of the cab, the name was 'Harry's last ride'. DH and I both saw it and were just silent. I knew from that day forth that Harry was with me and always will be. It seems like Phoebe wanted to give Mummy a similar message.
Jo: I am with the other girls. Your SIL has every right to be excited about her baby, but that doesn't mean that she can forget about you and your feelings, especially leading up to Storms due date. I agree that a tactful email sounds like a good idea. Is she DH's sister? If so, perhaps he could talk to her for you. Big hugs sweetie, and I'll tell AF to back off for you.
Lynn: How are you feeling, has it sunk in at all? I meant to say earlier, if you want me to come with you to your scans just let me know. I understand if you want DH or your Mumma there, but if they can't go, then let me know and I'll organise the time off work. I figure you may be going back to the SAN and I can appreciate what a step that will be so if you want me there, I'm there. I can ask all those funky questions I asked at my scan and make sure they do a good job ;) Lord knows I've had enough scans in my time.
Deb: I have been lucky enough never to experience a migraine, but I have a friend who gets them so I am sending heaps of sympathy your way. I really hope that you feel better soon. Only 2 sleeps until you get to see Col again.
Well big love to everyone else, surprise, surprise, I am off to bed.
Lv Spring
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*Tissue Alert*
I just recevied this email from a friend. She has written this poem for me. I thought I would share.
From Mother to Son
Another month has passed,
And yet it seems like yesterday
That I held you in my arms
Wishing that you could have stayed
My love has never dimmed
And will never ever fade
You fill my heart, my soul, my mind
Every single passing day
I remember you with joy
I remember you with pain
I remember you in sunshine
In darkness, and in rain
My lovely angel child, my heart
My love, my little boy
My first born I will remember
And will forever adore
I need you with me always
Close to Mummy's heart, my love
Because I need to feel your strength
Shining down from up above
I will always remember
With pride, with tears, with love
My darling little angel
My son, forever young
Lv Spring
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That is so beautiful Spring - the line that got to me the most was the last "My son, forever young" :crying:
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Lol Mel, I think everyone is probably very confused by the Highpants thing. Thats OK, I geddit! I got a couple of replies about the VBA2C but I don't relly think it is for me. I have some major 'trust iss-ews' with my body after losing Asha. I just kind of feel like it didn't do what it was supposed to do and it robbed me of my baby IYKWIM. So not sure that I will trust it with another one:cry: I know that is a silly way to think, especially after tests revealed what happened to her was just 'bad luck' but I just don't have too much confidence at the moment. Maybe that will change later and I will look into it again. So tomorrow is the big day....how exciting.you guys better get jiggy-wid-it over the next few days, and I agree, harass the doc for the IUI, it certainly can't hurt can it? I think it would be good for you to know that you are doing everything possible. Good luck!:ttc: <----Lol, thats you guys, how cute!
Spring - Yay, No more lonely nights!! I bet the Frank and Vinnie will be happy to have dad home too.
Flowerchild - Your poor head. I hope you are feeling better soon.
Klee - Thats a sweet story, and as soon as I read it I thought of the one Spring just told you about Harry. It gave me chills, but the nice ones not the scary ones:hugs:
jlk - If you can't be a sook here, where can you? Not only that, I think we all have every right to be sooky every now and then. I hope you are feeling better soon.:hug:
Well, very sore boobie's today (not the most PC term, but that is what DS calls them,lol)
And very queasy...hooray! I have promised I am not going to complain about anything..well maybe the stretchmarks, haemeroids(sp?) and swollen feet.....nah, bring em on.
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:cry: Spring, that is really beautiful. What a great friend.
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MEL - WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE STILL?? GO AND PRO-CREATE!!!
(AND YES, I AM YELLING):p
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Its only 9 o'clock Bailey - LMAO :cryinglaugh:
Well as made up as this is gonna sound, the FS actually told us to do it "as late as possible" in the night and they have given us the earliest appointment which is 7.30am, which means we have to leave home at 6.30am... I am soooooo not a morning person :doh:
Bring on the :ms: - hey you forgot the varicose veins (not that I got them but know others who have). And dont pick on "boobies", thats what I call them too :redface:
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Lol Mel, you might have to have a little morning romp!
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Oh god no - that would mean waking up even earlier :o
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Do you have to stay laying down so as to not lose any of the 'goods'? Lol, sorry, I am just so excited for you:D
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Yeah I do, its in the instructions - too bad if I need to wee huh? LOL ;) I dont know if I am supposed to put my butt up on a pillow though, it doesnt say. Its so uncomfy doing that :rolleyes:
But I just had a look and I have lost the piece of paper :o I hope there is nothing else I have to do (apart from the obvious :lol:) - mind you its hardly rocket science!
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good luck for today Mel!
Well looks like there will be no bfp for me this month, i have started spotting :crying: So I guess by tomorrow AF will have started :cry:
Will come back later when I feel a bit better!
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Mel - :hug: :hug: :hug:
Spring - that poem is soooooo beautiful. It made me cry. You have such a special friend. One of your beautiful friends sent me the most special email. It was gorgeous. Thank you for the offer of coming to the scans with me. I learnt so much when I went with you so they better look out! I will make them look for everything!! At this stage I only have an appointment with my ob for next Tuesday which DH will come and then the week after (7weeks) we are seeing FS and he will do a scan and check that there is a heartbeat and everything is going well. I am absolutely scared s%&$less about going back to the SAN but I have to overcome the fear. I just don't know how I will sit in that waiting room again. DH won't be able to come to every scan with me because of work but he will come to most of them. The ones he doesn't come to my mum has put her hand up and I would really love for her to share in this experience seeing as though she didn't with Cooper........but I will keep you mind if I am stuck because I will definitely need someone!
Bailey - go the sore boobies!!!!! I'm like you. Once i get symptoms, I will not be complaining, I will be cheering! Others just don't understand do they? It is a hard onee - trying to have confidence in your own body, the body that failed us once before. I don't know if it is harder or not when we are told that it was just 'bad luck'. I know when I tell people that I lost Cooper to a cord accident they tell me how rare it is. I think it makes it worse knowing that something so rare still found me. Statistics mean absolutely nothing to be anyone. I think if it found me once, it can find me again. I think I am a bit scared at the moment because I believe that *Hope's* cord is developing now. I ORDERED THIS ONE WITHOUT A CORD!!!! I just hope that it isn't as long as Cooper's. :pray:
Jo - :SAAF: Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo I hope it is implantation spotting. Is there a chance it might be? I hope you are ok. I'm thinking of you and sending you the biggest hug. I really really wanted you to get a bfp on Storm's due date. I hate AF soooo much!! Doesn't she know she isn't welcome here.
Deb - I hope your miagrane is better today. One more sleep and you will get to see *Col* again - yipee!!!!
Well to answer your questions Spring, no it hasn't sunk in. I just don't feel pg. I don't feel any different to how I was a week ago. I am waiting for the results of my bt so hopefully the levels have gone up and that I might start to feel something. I think after my scan I will feel pg because at least I can see something. The waiting game continues! Seriously how long does it take to test some blood!!!! J/J I know there are other people, but they make you wait all day which is just cruel!
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I have been flat out today but Mel you have been especially on my mind.
Mel I hope that that lovely test went well... I am eagerly waiting to hear an update... I have to take DS to footy training (it is soooooooo wet up here but he is insisting and his Daddy is the coach so we have to be "good"!) but I will be back at about 5.30pm... I wil lcome back then. :hug:
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Jo - I am so sorry you have started spotting, hopefully Lynn is right and it is implantation bleeding. :crossfingers: for you.
Lynn - Have you got the results yet? I am so sorry btw, with everything today I didnt remember you BT :redface: Thanks for your support today.
Well the post-coit test was today - results were good and not good. The good part is the test was normal. He said CM is good consistency and under microscope there were at a guess 200 healthy active swimmers in the tiny sample that he took. He did an ultrasound that showed 1 large follicle ready to burst so apparrently I will ovulate tonight or tomorrow. Which seems a bit early cause today is only CD12. He said the lining is 10mm so really good for implantation. Everything looks "perfect" which I guess its good. I spoke to him about doing the IUI and explained how important it is and how desperate I feel (got teary in the process :rolleyes:) to get pg this month. He said if I really want it he is happy to do it but it really isnt going to be any more effective than DTD. He said that my CM is perfect for sperm to swim through so they are getting where they need to be. He said the washing isnt going to help all that much because the main reason they wash them is to take out the prostaglandin (?sp and I may have name wrong) because it causes abdo pain in women, whereas when DTD it separates and from sperm in cervix. So yeah he said we can try but he really doesnt believe its gonna be of any extra benefit. In saying all of that, this month we have to just sit and wait until AF either comes or doesnt cause he cant do anything atm cause he will risk disrupting any pregnancy that may occur in the next day or so. If AF arrives (which lets face it, she is gonna) I am booked in for a laparoscopy on 28th June which is under a general and he will look around and make sure there are no blockages, adhesions or infections that are preventing me from getting pregnant. If he finds anything wrong (which he said he highly doubts) he will fix it while he is there. If nothing is wrong, the next step is IVF! I just dont understand how this can be, I mean I got pregnant with Nicholas after stuffing up my pill - I hadnt even been trying! He said that unexplained fertility is in itself a medical condition, just noone can put a name on it. He said there is and always will be things that medical science cant explain and unfortunately I am one of those cases. He does think that we would have a really high chance with IVF because of there being no reason for the infertility. He said because they are implanting a fertilised egg all we have to do is hope that my body will hold the pregnancy and there is a great chance that it will. I am feeling a little sad and sorry for myself today - I never thought I would be going down this road. Maybe this is punishment for saying after Nicholas was born that nothing can hurt me now - maybe mother nature is trying to prove me wrong :cry:
Anyway, I was worse this morning - as the day has gone by I feel ok. I am starting to wonder if maybe for some reason unknown as yet I need to experience this. Hopefully it will be clear one day, what I do know is that when I am lucky enough to have my bub in my arms I am going to feel like the luckiest woman on earth!
Bye for now, going to buy some bread to have with soup for dinner. Be back later.
Mel
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Hugs Mel - I can imagine today was a lot to take in. It is great that that mucous is looking gorgeous and that there is a lovely ripe follie waiting to burst! This is all wonderful.
My love, if you don't conceive this month - which is certainly not a given it wouldnt' surprise me AT ALL! ;) Then the ivf may be the what you need in your bag of tricks... Hve you got some opk's? JUst that he can't be certain when you will ovulate so keep an eye out. My follies were ripe for 7 days before they erupted on one cycle. My obs couldn't believe it! So do some testing and dtd and we are all praying, hoping and sending positive thoughts for this to be your month... :hug:
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Mel: I am so sorry that today was a tough day for you. I have been thinking of you all day. Talking about IVF must be so confusing, it just doesn't seem fair and I hope that it is no more than a conversation and that you don't have to go down that road.
Now, lets try to be positive (almost impossible I know) but it is great that the follie is ripe, the lining is thick and the CM is good. Please oh please let this be your month.
This is not punishment babe, and you have every right to feel sad and sorry for yourself. I just want to reach through here and give you a big cuddle.
Jo: I seriously hope that the spotting is just implantation bleeding as Lynn said and AF stays the heck away.
Lynn: Hanging out to hear about your fantastic BT results. Hopefully they didn't make you wait too long.
Lv Spring
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Mel - what a hectic day you have had and pls believe that you have NOT been punished (i know it feels like it). You still have positives going your way - by the sounds of it your CM and follies look nice and healthy - what a great start - that in itself is positive. Chin up girl - it will happen - you will get that BFP very soon my love. At least you are investigating and getting some answers and progressing - another bonus. You will have that baby growing inside of you in no time - i know it. Big hugs to you.
Jlk - i do hope AF stays away - fingers crossed it is a BFP instead.
Hello to everyone else - hope you are well.
