I dislike bridal showers - you're already getting a wedding gift, now you want a bride one too? I don't like the whole concept. I know a friend who had one and I didn't attend. It's supposed to be old kitchen stuff given to the bride so she starts with a fully stocked kitchen.

My kitchen stuff is STILL my mum's old stuff that I went to Uni with! Well, aside from the NEW kitchen stuff I had on my wedding list. I am NOT giving away my only potato masher so someone else can have something I've used since a tot and love.

A tea party is a nice idea - I didn't have a "go out and get drunk" night but a nice meal out two weeks before the wedding. That was lovely. And no sleepover prior either. I wouldn't have liked that: I wanted an early day, knowing I was going to be "on" all the next day and I'd need to be rested.

I would have loved (and told Sis and Mum, who both pooh-poohed this) a day/weekend at a spa with facials and mud baths etc. Not very "hen party" by today's standards but I'd have loved it! DH did have the sleepover, but only cos it was a drunken night (I made sure the lads had water and toast when they got in and heard all about it) then paintballing the next day.

Maybe ask your sister what SHE wants to do and organise that?